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Old 07-22-2001, 06:03 PM   #3
jallanite
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Re: No more metal monsters.

<u> Omitting the Metal Monsters</u>

In FG Tolkien, as will apear in a quotations below, distinguishes between three kinds of monsters:
***1. Those made of linked iron that flow like rivers of metal and are hollow within.
***2. Those of bronze and copper with spirits of blazing fire and with great feet, blasting and trampling all in their path.
***3. Extremely hot creatures of pure flame before which iron and stone melt and on which Balrogs ride.

This third kind is no problem later, as in the accounts in the battle it does not appear openly that the &quot;fire-drakes&quot; are composed of pure flame, and not simply a type of dragon of hotter and more firey metabolism. Indeed in &quot;Turambar and the Foalóke&quot; is written:<blockquote>Quote:<hr> Now the least mighty**- yet were they very great beside the Men of those days*** are cold as is the nature of snakes and serpents, and of them a many having wings go with uttermost noise and speed; but the mightier are hot and very heavy and slow-going, and some belch flame, and fire flickereth beneath their scales, and the lust and greed and cunning evil of these is the greatest of all creatures: and such was the Foalóke whose burning there set all the places of his habitation in waste and desolation.<hr></blockquote>So a fire-drake is now simply one of these latter kinds of dragons, still more adapted to be hot and firey.

As for the second kind, in &quot;Turambar and the Foalóke&quot; it is written of Glorund:<blockquote>Quote:<hr> ... and a great worm was with them whose scales were polished bronze, and his name was Glorund.<hr></blockquote> So some metalic imagery might be maintained for dragons of flesh though I do not do this here

In this first attempt all mechanical and metallic description is removed.

I code changes here as FG-D followed by a two-digit number. D of course stands of &quot;Dragon&quot;. As previously the following symbols are used:
[ ]*****Normalized, usually used for proper names indicating they are here in final form, not as in original text. Eg. &quot;M[orgoth]&quot; probably represents an original &quot;Melko&quot;, &quot;[ea]stward&quot;, represents original &quot;westward&quot;
{ }*****Material to be deleted.
<u>Underline</u> Material inserted for grammatical reasons or as editorial bridge.

The following complex of changes are understood to occur throughout and are not listed separately for each case: &quot;serpent(s) of (bronze and) iron&quot; to simple &quot;serpent(s)&quot;.

FG-D01: Deleting from Maeglin's advice to Morgoth.<blockquote>Quote:<hr> {From the greatness of his wealth of metal and his powers of fire h} <u>H</u>e bid him make {beasts like} snakes and dragons of irresistible might that should overcreep the Encircling Hills and lap that plain and its fair city in flame and death.<hr></blockquote>Maeglin now advises Morogth to make snakes and dragons (by which should be understood more of the normal kinds of snakes and dragons) but of great strength, as the best means of bringing Gondolin to the ground.

FG-D02: Devising of the dragons.<blockquote>Quote:<hr> Yet these years are filled by M[orgoth] in the utmost ferment of labour, and all the thrall-folk of the Noldo[r] must dig unceasingly for metals {while Melko sitteth and deviseth fires and calleth flames and smokes to come from the lower heats}, nor does {he}<u>Morgoth</u> suffer any of the Noldo[r] to stray ever a foot from their place of bondage. Then on a time M[orgoth] assembled all his most cunning {smiths and} sorcerers, and {of iron and flame} they wrought a host of monsters such as have only at that time been seen and shall not again be till the Great End. Some {were all of iron so cunningly linked that they} might flow like slow rivers of metal or coil themselves around and above all obstacles before them, and those {were filled in their innermost depths with} <u>carried on their backs</u> the grimmest of Or[k]s with scimitars and spears; others {of bronze and copper} were given hearts and spirits of blazing fire, and they blasted all that stood before them with the terror of their snorting or trampled whatso escaped the ardour of their breath; yet others were creatures of {pure} flame that writhed like ropes of molten metal, and they brought to ruin whatever fabric they came nigh, and iron and stone melted before them and became as water, and upon them rode the Balrogs {in hundreds[?]}; and these were the most dire of all those monsters which M[orgoth] devised against Gondolin.<hr></blockquote>The Noldor are now presumably mining metal to arm Morgoth's troops, not to create dragon. The revised acount leaves obscure how these monsters were devised: by breeding or by pods or other method. That they were only seen at that time would mean, in this new context, the time of the end of the First Age, not merely the time of the fall of Gondolin.

I am tempted to keep &quot;of bronze and copper&quot; and modify to &quot;with scales of bronze and copper&quot; here and elsewhere. It would be possible to distinguish iron-scaled and bronze-scaled dragons, but this feels too obviously &quot;clever&quot; to me. The omission of the number of Balrogs is questioned as something that should belong to another thread of change that chances to overlap this thread at this point and should not be considered in this discussion.

FG-D03: Description of the enemies.<blockquote>Quote:<hr> ... and go naked into the open against enemies of {steel and} fire, whose trampling shakes the earth ...<hr></blockquote>

FG-D04: Flexible dragons pressed into service.<blockquote>Quote:<hr> ****But now Gothmog, lord of Balrogs, captain of the hosts of M[orgoth], took counsel and gathered all his {things of iron} <u>creatures</u> that could coil themselves around and above all obstacles before them.<hr></blockquote>The word &quot;things&quot; doesn't really work at all if &quot;of iron&quot; is removed, as it doesn't seem to refer to the dragons sufficiently. It sounds like the account is talking about some kind of siege devices, like ropes with grapling hooks. Hence I emend to &quot;creatures&quot;. Too daring?

FG-D05: Hollowness of the iron beasts.<blockquote>Quote:<hr> Then the engines and the catapults of the king poured darts and boulders and molten metals on those ruthless beasts, and {their hollow bellies clanged} <u>they screamed</u> beneath the buffeting, yet it availed not, for they might not be broken, and the fires rolled off them. Then {were} <u>from</u> the topmost {opened about their middles, and} an innumerable host of the Or[k]s, the goblins of hatred, poured {therefrom} into the breach;<hr></blockquote>Minimal change here in the kind of noise that came from the beasts. If felt to be too daring then eliminate &quot;and their hollow bellies clanged beneath the buffeting,&quot; entirely.

Some deletions and movement of the word &quot;from&quot; in the last sentence to make it appear the Orks have climbed the stacked beasts as the great-footed dragons will soon do.

FG-D06: The great-footed dragons prepare to attack Gondolin.<blockquote>Quote:<hr> ****Now then the plan that they made was to hold what they had won, while those serpents {of bronze and} with great feet for trampling climbed slowly over {those of iron} <u>the others</u>, and reaching the walls there opened a breach wherethrough the Balrogs might ride upon the dragons of flame: yet they knew this must be done with speed, for the heats of those drakes lasted not for ever{, and might only be plenished from the wells of fire that Melko had made in the fastness of his own land}.<hr></blockquote>I think the replacement of &quot;those of iron&quot; with &quot;the others&quot; is a minimal change. That the fire of the dragons can only be replenished by wells of fire in Angband works for me with the original bronze dragons, but not with live creatures. But the idea that the flame of the dragons dies out after use and must be replenished (now presumably by rest) can be retained.

FG-D07: Breaking of the Walls.<blockquote>Quote:<hr> ... one of those {brazen} snakes <u>with great feet</u> heaves against the [ea]stern wall and a great mass of it shakes and falls, and behind comes a creature of fire and <u>a[?]</u> Balrog{s[?]} upon it.<hr></blockquote>We need something too connect the bronze serpent here to those previously mentioned. Since the attribute of bronze is gone, I repeat instead &quot;with great feet&quot; from the previous description. Again, the Balrog change belongs to another thread of consideration, hence the queries here.

FG-D08: Imprisonment of the Noldor.<blockquote>Quote:<hr> ... and many, if occasion let, they bound and led back and flung {in the iron chambers} amid the dragons of iron, that they might drag them afterward to be thralls of M[orgoth].<hr></blockquote>The prisoners are flung, presumably tied, to be guarded by dragons, not flung into cells within the dragons' bodies.

FG-D09: At the gate.<blockquote>Quote:<hr> Fire-drakes are about it and monsters {of iron} fare in and out of its gates, and great is that sack of the Balrogs and Or[k]s.<hr></blockquote>This is equivalent to FG-C08 in the main fall of Gondolin discussion. The change of course should now be considered as part of this discussion and not as part of discussion of the general closing changes.

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