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Old 09-04-2017, 05:10 PM   #4
Shade of Carn Dm
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 389
ArcusCalion has just left Hobbiton.
If we are to add in the Dwarves and Men material (which I would argue we should not) I have composed a draft of how it might be done.

The first paragraph of Of the Kindreds and Houses of the Edain must be greatly altered, due to the fact that I missed the change in order of the arrival of the tribes in Beleriand, and also the note in Ros about their sojurn by the sea of Rhun.

13. Soon after the departure of Felagund the other Men of whom Bor had spoken came also into Beleriand. First came NE-KE-0.2 <Moved up Marach {led}[leading] his people over the Mountains; and they were a tall and warlike folk, and they marched in ordered companies; and the Green-elves hid themselves and did not waylay them. NE-KE-0.5<DM They were a more numerous people; each host was as great as all the Folk of Bor, and they were better armed and equipped; also they possessed many horses, and some asses and small flocks of sheep and goats. They had crossed Eriador and reached the eastern feet of the Mountains (Ered Lindon) a year or more ahead of all others, but had not attempted to find any passes, and had turned away seeking a road round the Mountains, which, as their horsed scouts reported, grew ever lower as they went southwards.> And Marach hearing that the people of Bor were dwelling in a green and fertile land, came down the Dwarf-road and settled his people in the country to the south and east of the dwellings of Baran son of Bor. There was great friendship between the peoples NE-KE-01{, though they were sundered in speech, until they both learned the Sindarin tongue.}[.]> NE-KE-01.2 <Ros Note 13: The Atani had never seen the Great Sea before they came at last to Beleriand; but according to their own legends and histories the Folk of {Hador}[Marach] had long dwelt during their westward migration by the shores of a sea too wide to see across; it had no tides, but was visited by great storms. It was not until they had developed a craft of boat-building that the people afterwards known as the Folk of Hador discovered that a part of their host from whom they had become separated had reached the same sea before them, and dwelt at the feet of the high hills to the south-west, whereas they {[the Folk of Hador]} lived in the north-east, in the woods that there came near to the shores. They were thus some two hundred miles apart, going by water; and they did not often meet and exchange tidings. Their tongues had already diverged, with the swiftness of the speeches of Men in the Unwritten Days, and continued to do so; though they remained friends of acknowledged kinship, bound by their hatred and fear of the Dark Lord (Morgoth), against whom they had rebelled. Nonetheless they did not know that the Lesser Folk had fled from the threat of the Servants of the Dark and gone on westward, while they had lain hidden in their woods, and so under their leader Bor reached Beleriand at last many years before they did.> The next year, however, [came] <Moved down the Haladin; NE-KE-0.3 <DM They were probably more numerous than the Folk of Bor, but no certain count of them was ever made; for they came secretly in small parties and hid in the woods of Ossiriand[;] {where the Elves showed them no friendship.}> but meeting the unfriendship of the Nandor they turned north and dwelt in Radhrost, in the country of Caranthir son of Fanor; and there for a time they had peace, though the people of Caranthir paid little heed to them.
Then the second to last paragraph must be changed as well.

33. All these were caught in the net of the Doom of the Noldor; and they did great deeds which the Eldar remember still among the histories of the Kings of old. And in those days the strength of Men was added to the power of the Noldor, and hope was renewed; and the people of the three houses of Men throve and multiplied. NE-KE-03 <DM{Greatest was the House of Hador Golden-head, peer of Elven-lords. Many of his people were like him, golden-haired and blue-eyed; they were tall and strong, quick to wrath and laughter, fierce in battle, generous to friend and to foe, swift in resolve, fast in loyalty, joyous in heart, the children of Ilvatar in the youth of Mankind. But the people of the House of Bor were dark or brown of hair; their eyes were grey and keen and their faces fair and shapely. Lithe and lean in body they were long-enduring in hardship. Of all Men they were most like the Noldor and most loved by them; for they were eager of mind, cunning-handed, swift in understanding, long in memory; and they were moved sooner to pity than to mirth, for the sorrow of Middle-earth was in their hearts. Like to them were the woodland folk of Haleth; but they were shorter and broader, sterner and less swift. They were less eager for lore, and used few words; for they did not love great concourse of men, and many among them delighted in solitude, wandering free in the greenwoods while the wonder of the lands of the Eldar was new upon them. But in the realms of the West their time was brief and their days unhappy.} The Folk of {Hador}[Marach] were ever the greatest in numbers of the Atani, and in renown (save only Beren son of Barahir descendant of Bor). For the most part they were tall people, with flaxen or golden hair and blue-grey eyes, but there were not a few among them that had dark hair, though all were fair-skinned. [Footnote: No doubt this was due to mingling with Men of other kind in the past; and it was noted that the dark hair ran in families that had more skill and interest in crafts and lore.]
Nonetheless they were akin to the Folk of Bor, as was shown by their speech. It needed no lore of tongues to perceive that their languages were closely related, for although they could understand one another only with difficulty they had very many words in common. The Elvish loremasters [Footnote: With a knowledge of the language of the Folk of Bor that was later lost, save for a few names of persons and places, and some words or phrases preserved in legends. One of the common words was atan.] were of opinion that both languages were descended from one that had diverged (owing to some division of the people who had spoken it) in the course of, maybe, a thousand years of the slower change in the First Age. Though the time might well have been less, and change quickened by a mingling of peoples; for the language of {Hador}[Marach] was apparently less changed and more uniform in style, whereas the language of Bor contained many elements that were alien in character. This contrast in speech was probably connected with the observable physical differences between the two peoples. There were fair-haired men and women among the Folk of Bor, but most of them had brown hair (going usually with brown eyes), and many were less fair in skin, some indeed being swarthy. Men as tall as the Folk of Hador were rare among them, and most were broader and more heavy in build. [Footnote: Beren the Renowned had hair of a golden brown and grey eyes; he was taller than most of his kin, but he was broad-shouldered and very strong in his limbs.]
In association with the Eldar, especially with the followers of King Finrod, they became as enhanced in arts and manners as the Folk of {Hador}[Marach], but if these surpassed them in swiftness of mind and body, in daring and noble generosity, [Footnote: The Eldar said, and recalled in the songs they still sang in later days, that they could not easily be distinguished from the Eldar - not while their youth lasted, the swift fading of which was to the Eldar a grief and a mystery.] the Folk of Bor were more steadfast in endurance of hardship and sorrow, slow to tears or to laughter; their fortitude needed no hope to sustain it. But these differences of body and mind became less marked as their short generations passed, for the two peoples became much mingled by intermarriage and by the disasters of the War.
The Folk of Haleth were strangers to the other Atani, speaking an alien language; and though later united with them in alliance with the Eldar, they remained a people apart. Among themselves they adhered to their own language, and though of necessity they learned Sindarin for communication with the Eldar and the other Atani, many spoke it haltingly, and some of those who seldom went beyond the borders of their own woods did not use it at all. They did not willingly adopt new things or customs, and retained many practices that seemed strange to the Eldar and the other Atani, with whom they had few dealings except in war. Nonetheless they were esteemed as loyal allies and redoubtable warriors, though the companies that they sent to battle beyond their borders were small. For they were and remained to their end a small people, chiefly concerned to protect their own woodlands, and they excelled in forest warfare. Indeed, for long even those {Orks}[Orcs] specially trained for this dared not set foot near their borders. One of the strange practices spoken of was that many of their warriors were women, though few of these went abroad to fight in the great battles. This custom was evidently ancient; [Footnote: Not due to their special situation in Beleriand, and maybe rather a cause of their small numbers than its result. They increased in numbers far more slowly than the other Atani, hardly more than was sufficient to replace the wastage of war; yet many of their women (who were fewer than the men) remained unwed.] for their chieftainess Haleth had been a renowned amazon with a picked bodyguard of women.>
34. The years of ...... had beheld the Light.
The Pukel and Drug sections I think must be separated, as they contain much reference to the Second and Third ages. However, besides the note from Ros, I do not think the Dwarves and Men material should be added, simply because the essay contains much about the Second and Third ages of Men that is said nowhere else, and to discard it and chop it up without real reason seems a shame to me.

Last edited by ArcusCalion; 09-04-2017 at 05:18 PM.
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