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Old 07-24-2003, 01:46 AM   #5
piosenniel
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Sting

Here is a suggestion for the game presented by Elora.

Please note my comments in Bold Caps:

_____________________________________________

Elora’s suggestions:

Here's the rough outline I mentioned. Very much subject to suggestion, revision and perhaps complete re-work (I am known to obliterate much of my work if I decide it's not up to scratch)...

  • Naiore fled Mordor in the ruin that followed Sauron's downfall at the end of the 3rd Age. Unable to take ship to Valinor (Cirdan would likely eviscerate her upon sight, I daresay, making the oceans an altogether risky form of travel), she is trapped within Middle-Earth.
  • Naiore's identity is a closely guarded secret. Myths and horror stories circulate, commencing in proper at the Battle of Gladden Fields and growing and evolving through the Third Age. A very small circle know the reality of the person behind it. That select group is: Sauron, the White Council, Aragorn, those rare few of Naiore's kindred who live still and acknowledge that they know her (such is the shame upon her head that many do not - her parents included).
  • There is much to mop up at the beginning of the Fourth Age, cities to re-build, countries as well. Naiore disappears in the chaos and goes to ground, knowing that the hunt will certainly follow and that she no longer can use Mordor as a protection. She is alone for the first time in her long life, and she knows it (and loathes those that brought this to her - never her fault).
  • Her haunts in the south of habit are being watched for any fugitives. This forces Naiore into a course of action not of her choosing, and enrages her as control shifts from her grasp.
  • Her hatred of the Free Peoples grows apace. Forced to move north, Naiore is forced back through now unopressed and hostile lands. Where she can, she uses what remnants of Mordor's networks survive to help her escape, and then destroys them herself to prevent them from betraying her. A chain of inexplicable deaths, some welcomed and some not (hidden operatives working for Mordor that no one suspected) starts to emerge.
  • The authorities realize that someone of rank and authority, someone important, has escaped their net on Mordor, and they realize with dread just who it may be.
  • As a precaution, Menecin is moved to Lothlorien so that should Naiore be indeed alive and active, he is protected from her desperate rage.

    HOW MUCH PROTECTION WILL LOTHLORIEN AFFORD, SINCE GALADRIEL WILL HAVE LEFT AT THE END OF THE THIRD AGE?
  • Naiore, who despises aimless wandering and a general lack of organization, soon settles on a new project - the destruction of her people and those descended from Numenor. The other "rabble" (common Men, Dwarves and Hobbits) are beneath her concern and she's to leave them to their own devices.
  • Naiore runs greater and greater risks, hunted and hunting, for there is nothing else for her than the ignominy of a life on the run (like an animal) or execution. Part of her wishes to force her people to execute her, for the sadness and grief in that act will cut as surely as her blades can.
  • Vanwe, in the chaos of Harad now suddenly released from Mordor's oppression, escapes and follows rumours north in a way more highly placed hunters can't. Vanwe, as a vagabond, gets all sorts of information from all manner of footpads, as she moves in search of answers and her parents.
  • Naiore reaches north, caught precariously between the Grey Havens and Cirdan, and Imladris and Elrond. Why she remains, though, is the untapped and untainted Shire. It's ripe for the picking, and Naiore is a woman with nothing to loose.

    THE SHIRE IS NOT RIPE FOR PICKING AT THE END OF THE WAR – IT IS UNDER THE PROTECTION OF THE HIGH KING, AND BECOMES A CLOSED COMMUNITY. YOU WILL NEED TO CONSIDER WHERE YOU CAN MOVE THE STORYLINE TO ACCOMMODATE THIS.
  • Her hand, though, is held in the Shire – AGAIN, THIS WILL NEED TO BE CHANGED TO ANOTHER LOCATION by two discoveries. The first is the discovery that Vanwe has somehow followed her (a threat that needs to be dealt with). The second, through those that follow Vanwe, is that Menecin is in Lothlorien.
  • Naiore uses her daughter to gain safe passage to Lothlorien. Vanwe is duped by the appearance of a kind and loving mother, the one she had wished for. Naiore's pursuers realise that Vanwe, an innocent, could die if Naiore is cornered.
  • Naiore is successful in getting to Lothlorien, where Galadriel is waiting for her. There, Vanwe learns perhaps the saddest truth of her neglected life: Naiore cares not one whit for her.

    GALADRIEL LEAVES MIDDLE EARTH IN 3021 THIRD AGE – HER LEAVING, ALONG WITH THE OTHER RINGBEARERS IS THE HERALDING IN OF THE FOURTH AGE.
  • I envisage a showdown, in which Naiore attempts to strike at the heart of Lothlorien and get at Menecin. Vanwe, destroyed, throws all caution to the wind and herself upon the uncertain kindness of those who wish to see Naiore stopped. Vanwe has not had a good experience with her own kin or Rangers in the past, and so for her it is a risk she takes for there is much suspicion as to Vanwe's character (implicated in her mother's escape from the Shire).

    AT THIS TIME, 4TH AGE, THERE WILL NOT BE MANY ELVES LEFT IN LOTHLORIEN – MANY WILL HAVE GONE WEST OR POSSIBLY TO ITHILIEN.
  • Vanwe is surprised by the mercy of those she turns to, and Naiore is prevented from killing Menecin. Menecin and Vanwe reunite, Naiore slips free by the skin of her pearly teeth.
  • The hunt is close behind, and perhaps with some poetic symmetry, Naiore is cornered on Gladden Fields attempting to elude her pursuers. This time, there is no marauding Black Army. She realizes that there is no escape, attempts to take as many out with her as she can. She dies in battle, fierce, unrepentant and uncowed, refusing to return in chains to the ignominy of a trial run by those she considers inferior to her.
  • Vanwe is left with the tattered remains of her family, a people she does not know, no home to speak of and the uncertain promise of freedom and life free of evil (much like what awaits those who survived Sauron).
  • Menecin, bereft, takes ship to Valinor, his daughter choosing to remain behind in mortal lands.
__________________________________________________ _____

Now, assuming all this hasn't put you to sleep here's what I see. Naiore's involvement will be in the plot, and become more and more frequent as the plot develops.

However, I see much more interesting developments in the characters and stories of those that hunt her. Why and how they hunt her. Menecin will only be a supporting character (a device to get Naiore back to Lothlorien and from there on a slippery steep, downward sliding free fall).

The stories of Kaldir, Lespheria, Amandur, Silvanis, Benia (if you think she's involved) are starting to mesh together, and they are a fascinating blend of characters. I would use Vanwe as my chief character vehicle.

Initially, most references to Naiore will be historical (accounts to her crimes in the past, perhaps from survivors or those who pursue her), memory based (again survivors, and her daughter), and briefly outlined so as to place her in relation to other characters. Occasionally, depending on what she's up to, I'd elaborate on what she's actually doing to shed some light on her complex nature (an evil Elf is not easily explained, e.g Maeglin).

YES, I WOULD NEED TO SEE A FAIRLY WELL DRAWN ACCOUNT OF HER MOTIVATIONS – AND LET’S AVOID CALLING HER AN EVIL ELF


Perhaps a hint that Vanwe or her hunters picked up would pin point Naiore in some way as being in some place. Not until they all reach the North would Naiore emerge more prominently, as until then she is in hiding (unhappily so - it's not fitting for a personage of noble blood and high rank in the competitive world of Mordor to skulk about like a starving wolf).

CAN YOU PICK OUT FROM THIS STORYLINE PERHAPS ONE SEGMENT OF THE ACTION - PARE IT DOWN - SO THAT YOU CAN ACCOMPLISH A SET GOAL FOR YOUR GAME?

THE WORKSHEET WILL BE YOUR MAP AND MINE OF HOW THE GAME WILL IN GENERAL DEVELOP – I AND THE OTHER PLAYERS WILL NEED TO SEE HOW YOU ARE PROCEEDING ON TO YOUR END DESTINATION/GOAL.

THERE IS ALWAYS ROOM FOR DEVELOPMENT OF CHARACTER AND SUBPLOT WITHIN A GAME, BUT NONETHELESS IT MUST MOVE TOWARD A DEFINED END POINT.

ALSO, THINKING AHEAD, IF YOU WISH, YOU CAN PROPOSE ANOTHER GAME SEGMENT ONCE THIS ONE IS ENDED WHICH CARRIES ON THE STORYLINE OR DEVELOPS IT IN ANOTHER DIRECTION.


[ July 24, 2003: Message edited by: piosenniel ]
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