The sign over the door reads "Welcome to the Prancing Pony Inn and Bar." Gandalf, after deftly dis-arming (pun intended) a local troublemaker with his staff, slides into a booth in the dark smoky bar with a rowdy atmosphere and a passable band covering a popular tune in the background. Frodo and the other three hobbits slide in next to him. Already lounging in the booth across from them is Aragorn and Arwen.
Aragorn: Name's Aragorn, captain of the Milennium Rangers. Arwen here tells me you're in need of a guide to Mordor.
Gandalf: Yes, indeed...if it's a fast guide.
Aragorn: Fast guide? You've never heard of Aragorn the Ranger?
Gandalf (raising an eyebrow): Should I have?
Aragorn: I'm the Ranger that made the Fornost to Rivendell run in less than 12 leagues! (Gandalf looks askance, doubtful) I've outrun men on horseback -- not the local cart-nags, mind you, I'm talkin' 'bout the big Rohirrim horses now. (a beat passes) I'm fast enough for you old man. What's the cargo?
Gandalf: Only passengers. Myself, the Boyd, three other hobbits...and no questions asked.
Aragorn (grinning): What is it, some kind of local trouble?
Gandalf: Let's just say we'd like to avoid any Mordorian entanglements.
Aragorn: Well, that's the real trick isn't it? And it's going to cost you something extra. (another beat) The kingship of Arnor, all in advance.
Frodo (incredulous): All Arnor? We could hire our own eagle for that!
Aragorn: Yeah, but who's gonna fly it shorty? You?
Frodo: You bet I could! My Uncle Bilbo rode eagles before! Why, I...(Gandalf shushes him)
Gandalf: We can get you the Shire now, plus all Arnor and Gondor, once we reach Mordor.
Aragorn: All Arnor and Gondor? (Gandalf nods) OK, you guys got yourselves a guide. We'll leave as soon as you're in, Prancing Pony room 94. (Gandalf nods and he and the hobbits exit the booth and the bar. Aragorn and Arwen exchange meaningful glances.) All Gondor and Arnor! Those guys must really be desperate! With that kind of real estate your dad is sure to let us marry...
[ November 05, 2002: Message edited by: Thenamir ]
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The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane. ~~ Marcus Aurelius
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