Simon Tolkien: Dad, Bono is in a band, U2.
Christopher: No, not me too, I've never been in a band.
Simon Tolkien: No, U2 is the name of a band Bono is in.
Christopher Tolkien: Bilbo's cousin is in a band?
Simon Tolkien: Who is Bilbo's cousin?
Christopher Tolkien: Bono Baggins from Archet, one of the Bree Bagginses.
Simon Tollkien: Dad, the gentleman who called, his name is Bono. He is a famous rock star.
Christopher Tolkien: What, like The Beatles?
Simon Tolkien: Yes, but a few decades newer.
Christopher Tolkien: Rock and roll is still a thing?
Simon Tolkien: Evidently...
Christopher Tolkien: Well, in any case, I am not interested in joining his band.
Simon Tolkien: Dad, Bono didn't want you to join his band.
Christopher Tolkien: No? It's just as well, I don't play an instrument. Although I did play bassoon in primary school. I wasn't very good...
Simon Tolkien: Ummm...I'll give you a ring tomorrow, Dad, have a good night.
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And your little sister's immaculate virginity wings away on the bony shoulders of a young horse named George who stole surreptitiously into her geography revision.
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