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Old 09-23-2017, 04:31 PM   #4
Findegil
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Join Date: Jul 2002
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Okay, lets try to give some feedback on this chapter. I agree that this chapter is more difficult than many others. For some time I thought about skipping all that was done and start all over again with AAm as basis text. I have reinstalled all the changes that we had to do from QS too LQ without editing marker. I will not discuss these, but in my point of view we have to document these. But their all enough other additions I had propose. Now to the changes in detail. To all changes which I don’t comment on (there are a few left, even so it is nearly beyond belief seeing then length of this post), I agree:

SM-01: The change you propose is very radical. I would try to hold more of the text and just adapt it to the later storyline:
Quote:
SM-EX-02 <LT Suddenly there {is}was a sound of wings in that place, for {Sorontur}[Sorontar] King of Eagles {is}was come again on strong wings through the dusk, and behold alighting on the boughs of darkened {Silpion}[Telperion] he {tells}told how {Melko}[Morgoth] {is}was now broken into the world and many evil spirits {are}were gathered to him: ’but,’ quoth he, ‘methinks never more will {Utumna}[Utumno] open unto him, and already is he busy making himself new dwellings in that region of the North where stand the Iron Mountains very high and terrible to seeSM-01<editorial addition , where of old his fortress Angband had been>. Yet O Manwë Lord of the Air, other tidings have I also for thy ear, for lo! …
SM-01.5: In the farther message of Sorontar we have to change ‘some’ to ‘all’. Because in all later sources it is recorded that Fëanor set the fleet to fire not drift it away.

SM-01.6: Why did you stop there? The saying of the Elves and Men about the burning of boats cold also be taken:
Quote:
... that the {Noldoli}[Noldor] were gone forever and their ships burned or abandoned, and {Melko}[Morgoth] too was in the world SM-01.6{, and the hunt of no avail}; and belike it is in memory of those deeds that it has ever been a saying in the mouths of Elves and Men that those burn their boats who put all hope from them of change of mind or counsel.>
§74 When the {Gods}[Valar] learned that the Noldor had fled,…
{Qerkaringa}[Quercaringa]: Agreed.

SM-01.7, SM-02.1 to SM-02.7; SM-03.5; SM-04.1 and SM-05.1: Cullulin and Silindrin must be dry, otherwise Yavanna would not need the Silmarills to rekindle the trees. And with that also the useless ‘watering’ of the trees and so forth.
Quote:
Only the light of the stars remained SM-01.7{, save where a glow lay about the fountain of Kulullin playing still or a pale gleam lingered nigh deep Telimpe, vat of dreams. Yet even these were dimmed and tarnished, for the Trees bore dew no more for their replenishment}.
Wherefore {does}did Vána arise and seek Lóriën, and with them {go}went SM-02 {Urwendi}[Árië] and Silmo and many of both {Vali}[Maiar] and the Elves; SM-02.1{and they gather much light of gold and silver in great vessels and fare}[fared] sadly to the ruined Trees. There {singeth}sang Lóriën most wistful songs of {magic and }enchantment about the stock of {Silpion}[Telperion] SM-02.2{, and he bid water his roots with the radiance of Telimpe; and this was lavishly done, albeit small store thereof remained now in the dwellings of the Gods}. In like manner {doth}did Vána, and she {sings}sang old golden songs of the happier days, and {bids}bid her maidens dance their bright dances even such as they were used to dance upon the sward of the rosegardens nigh {Kulullin}[Culullin] SM-02.3{, and as they danced she flooded the roots of Laurelin with streams from out her golden jars}.
Yet all their singing and enchantment {is}was of little worth, SM-02.4{ and though the roots of the Trees seem to drink all that they may pour,} yet {can}could they see no stir of life renewed nor faintest gleam of light; nor withered leaf {glows}glowed with sap nor blossom {lifts}lifted its drooping stem. SM-02.5{Indeed in the frenzy of their grief they had poured out all the last remaining stores of brightness that the Gods retained, had not of}Of a fortune Manwë and Aulë come upon them in that hour, being drawn thither by their singing in the gloom, and stayed them, saying: ‘Lo, O Vána, and thou O Lóriën, what is this rashness? And wherefore did ye not first take counsel of your brethren? SM-02.6{ For know ye not that that which ye spill unthinking upon the earth is become more precious than all the things the world contains; and when it is gone perchance not all the wisdom of the Gods may get us more.}’
Then Vána said: ‘Pardon, O Manwë Súlimo, and let my sorrow and my tears be my excuse; SM-02.7{yet aforetime did this draught fail never to refresh the heart of Laurelin, and she bare ever in return a fruit of light more plentiful than we gave; }and methought the {Gods}[Valar] sat darkly in their halls and for the weight of their grief essayed no remedy of their ills. But behold now have Lóriën and I put forth our spells and naught may they avail,’ and Vána wept.


… Then did Manwë call together all the folk of Valinor once more; and that great throng was gathered even in Vána's bower amidst her roses, where {Kulullin's}[Culullin’s] fountains SM-03.5{were}had once been, for the plain without lay now all cold and dark. …


… Then told he them concerning those stores of radiance they still possessed; for of silver light they had no great store save only that SM-04.1{that yet lay in Telimpe, and a lesser }measure that Aulë had in basins in his smithy. SM-04.2{Some indeed had the Eldar lovingly saved in tiny vessels as it flowed and wasted in the soils about the stricken bole, but it was little enough.}
Now the smallness of their store of white light was due to many causes, …

Yet even of this golden radiance was there no SM-05.1{unfailing} source, now that Laurelin dripped her sweet dew no more. SM-05.2 <moved from aboveSome indeed had the Eldar lovingly saved SM-05.2<editorial addition< of both lights> in tiny vessels SM-05.3{as it flowed and wasted in the soils about the stricken bole}, but it was little enough.>< SM-EX-03.5 <LT ‘Behold,’ said Manwë, ‘this is now the third essay of the {Gods}[Valar] to bring light into dark places, and both the Lamps of the North and South, and the Trees of the plain, {Melko}[Morgoth] hath brought to ruin. SM-05.3{Now in the air only hath Melko no power for ill, wherefore}Wherefore it is my rede that we build a great vessel brimming with SM-05.4{golden }light and the hoarded dews SM-05.5{of Laurelin}, and this do set afloat like a mighty ship high above the dark realms of the Earth.
SM-04.2, SM-05.2, SM-05.25 & SM-05.3: I used this for the store of the jewel-smith of the Noldor. We need at least a tiny bit for the phials that Yavanna held and used in here trial to heal the Trees.

SM-03: The ‘Magic Sun’ does not go. I think we should change that to ‘Enchanted Sun’.

SM-05.3: Melkor attacked at least Tilion. So this must go.

SM-05.4 & SM-05.5: I would not specify gold or silver.

‘‘Lo, O Tuivána, and ye beside of the {Vali}[Valar?/Maiar?] and of the Elves, …‘: I think it is ‘people of the Valar’ here that covers the old meaning best.

SM-EX-03.5: This was only marked by moved from later: which in my opinion is not that clear.
Quote:
Now was the time of faintest hope and darkness most profound fallen on Valinor that was ever yet; and still did {Vana}[Lóriën] weep, {and she twined her golden hair about the bole of Laurelin and her tears dropped softly at its roots;}> SM-EX-03.5 <LT and he touched the wound in the bole of the Tree.
SM-09: I think we should use a bit more here.
Quote:
… Now Lóriën would suffer none to draw near, and this will he rue forever: for the branch upon which the Rose hung yielded all its sap and withered, nor even yet would he suffer that blossom to be plucked gently down, being enamored of its loveliness and lusting to see it grow mightier SM-09{than the fruit of noon, more glorious than the Sun}.
Then snapped the withered bough and the Rose of Silpion fell, …
SM-11.5: Again a case were light from Telimpe was used:
Quote:
… Of virin now he built a marvelous vessel, and often have men spoken of the Ship of the Moon, yet is it scarce like to any bark that sailed on sea or air. Rather was it like an island of pure glass, albeit not very great, and tiny lakes there were bordered with snowy flowers that shone, for the water of those pools that gave them sap was the radiance of SM-11.5{Telimpe}[the last Rose of Teleperion]. Midmost of that shimmering isle was wrought a cup of that crystalline stuff that Aulë made and therein the magic Rose was set, …
SM-EX-04.2: This was only marked by moved from ealier: which in my opinion is not that clear.
Quote:
SM-EX-04 <LT Yet {even so }{Lorien}[Vána] {is}was not appeased, {not though}[and] the darkness of the mountains {creep}crept across the plain, and a mist {bloweth}blew in from off the sea and a vague and flitting twilight {gathers}[gathered] once more in Valinor, but long {he sits}she sat pondering why the spells of Yavanna wrought only upon {Laurelin}[Telperion].> SM-EX-04.2<LT and still did Vána weep, and she twined her golden hair about the bole of Laurelin and her tears dropped softly at its roots; …
SM-12.5: Again a case were light from Culullin is used:
Quote:
Then that the Ship of the Heavens might be made ready unto the last, the unfading petals of the latest flower of Laurelin were gathered like a star at her prow, and tassels and streamers of glancing light were hung about her bulwarks, and a flash of lightning was caught in her mast to be a pennant; but all that vessel was filled to the brim with the blazing radiance of gold SM-12.5{Kulullin and mingled therein drops }of the juices of the fruit of noon, and these were very hot, and thereafter scarcely might the bosom of the Earth withhold her, and she leapt at her cords like a captive bird that listeth for the airs.
When we come back to our basis text, the transition is not very smooth. I think we have to do that better:
Quote:
And Manwë hallowed {them}the two vessels, and SM-EX-04.4<editorial addition thus> Aulë and his folk had made vessels to hold them and preserve their radiance, as is said in SM-EX-04.5 <AAm the Narsilion,> the song of the Sun and Moon. These vessels the {Gods}[Valar] gave to Varda, that they might become lamps of heaven, outshining the ancient stars SM-EX-04.6 <AAm , being nearer to Arda>; and she gave them power to traverse the region of the stars, …
SM-EX-04.4: The ‘thus’ was already in the original draft, I only added the past perfect ‘had’.
SM-EX-04.5: In the draft this change was not marked.
SM-EX-04.6: Same here.

A source that was not used in the original draft is Myths Transformed. But I think there are passages that should be used:
Quote:
§75 Isil the Sheen the {{Gods}<LQgods>}[Vanyar] of old named the Moon SM-EX-07 <AAm , flower of Telperion,> in Valinor, and {Urin the Fiery}<LQ Anar Fire-golden> SM-EX-07.2 <AAm , fruit of Laurelin,> they named the Sun; but the {Eldar}[Noldor] named them <LQ also> Rána the wayward, the giver of visions, and SM-EX-07.4 {{Anar}<LQ[Urin >] Naira>, the heart of flame,}<AAm Vása> that awakens and consumes. For the Sun was set as a sign for the awakening of Men and the waning of the Elves; but the Moon cherishes their memory. SM-EX-07.5<MT; 2
Now the Sun was designed to be the heart of Arda, and the Valar purposed that it should give light to all that Realm, unceasingly and without wearying or diminution, and that from its light the world should receive health and life and growth. Therefore Varda set there the most ardent and beautiful of all those spirits that had entered with her into Eä, and she was named {Ār(i),[Footnote to the text: An s is pencilled over the r of Ar(i).]}Árië and Varda gave to her keeping a portion of the gift of Ilúvatar so that the Sun should endure and be blessed and give blessing. The Sun, the loremasters tell us, was in that beginning named Âs (which is as near as it can be interpreted Warmth, to which are joined Light and Solace), and that the spirit therefore was called Āzi{?} (or later {Āri?}Árië).> The {maiden}[youth] {from among their own folk by the Valar}<LQ whom the Valar chose from among the Maiar> to {guide the ship of the Sun was named Arien; and the youth who steered}sterr the floating island of the Moon was Tilion. {[Footnote to the text: hyrned AE]} In the days of the Trees {Arien[Footnote to the text: Daegbore]}[Árië] had tended the golden flowers in the gardens of Vána and watered them with the radiant dew of Laurelin. Tilion was a young hunter of the company of Oromë SM-EX-08 <AAm . He was a lover of silver,> and he had a silver bow SM-EX-08.5<AAm and he begged to be given the task of tending ever the last Flower of Silver>. He loved {Arien}[Árië], …
SM-EX-07.2, SM-EX-07.4 & SM-EX-08.5: All three were already in the first draft, I only added this the markers.

SM-EX-07.5: Here begins the Addition from MT. We used already the gift of Eru to Varda. Therefore it should be included here as well.

SM-EX-10.2 to SM-EX-10.97:As said at the start of this post, I think that AAm would probably have been the better basis text. Therefore now follow some changes that bring the text of LQ nearer to AAm:
Quote:
But Tilion was wayward and uncertain in speed, and held not to his appointed course; and at times he sought to tarry {Arien}[Árië], whom he loved, though the flame of Anar withered the sheen of Telperion's bloom, if he drew too nigh, and his vessel was scorched and darkened. Because of SM-EX-10.2 <[/b]AAm[/b] the waywardness of >Tilion, therefore, and yet more because of the prayers of Lóriën and {Niënna}<LQ Estë>, who said that all night and sleep and peace SM-EX-10.3 <[/b]AAm[/b] and rest >had been banished from the earth, SM-EX-10.4 <[/b]AAm[/b] and the stars were hidden,> Varda changed her {design}<LQ counsel>, and allowed a time wherein the world should still have shadow and half-light. SM-EX-10.5{The Sun}<[/b]AAm[/b] Anar> {rests}<LQ rested>, therefore, a while in Valinor, lying upon the cool bosom of the Outer Sea. So Evening, which is the time of the descent and resting of the Sun, {is}<LQ was> the hour of greatest light and joy in Valinor. But soon the Sun {is}<LQ was> drawn down into {Vaiya}[Ekkaia] by the servants of Ulmo, and SM-EX-10.6{brought in haste}<[/b]AAm[/b] went then in haste under the Earth, and came so unseen> to the East, and {mounts}<LQ mounted> the sky again, lest night be overlong and evil strengthened. But the waters of SM-EX-10.7{Vaiya}}<[/b]AAm[/b] the Outer Sea> {are}<LQ were> made hot and {glow}<LQ glowed> with colored fires, and Valinor {has}<LQ had> light for a while after the passing of {Arien}[Árië]; yet as she {goes}<LQ went> under the earth and {draws}<LQ drew> towards the East the glow {fades}<LQ faded> and Valinor {is}<LQ was> dim, and the {Gods}[Valar] {mourn}<LQ mourned> then most for the death of Laurelin. At dawn the shadows of their Mountains of Defense {lie}<LQ lay> heavy on the land of the Valar.
Quote:
[The Wood at the World’s End; Artist; no. 60; p. 63]
The Wood at the World's End
§78 Varda commanded the Moon to SM-EX-10.8{rise only after the Sun had left heaven, but he {travels}<LQ traveled> with uncertain pace, and still {pursueth}<LQ pursued> her, so that at times they both {are}<LQ were> in the sky together, and still at times he {draws}<LQ drew> nigh to her, and there {is}<LQ was> a darkness amid the day.}<[/b]AAm[/b] to journey in like manner, and passing under Earth to arise in the East, but only after the Sun had descended from heaven. But Tilion went with uncertain pace, as yet he goes, and was still drawn towards Arien, as he shall ever be; so that oft both may be seen above the Earth together, or at times it will chance that he comes so nigh that his shadow cuts off her brightness, and there is a darkness amid the day.
§177 Therefore by the coming and going of Anar the Valar reckoned the days thereafter until the Change of the World.> But Tilion {tarries}<LQ tarried> seldom in Valinor, loving rather the great lands; and mostly he {passes}<LQ passed> swiftly over the western land, either {Arvalin}[Avathar] or {{Eruman}<LQ Aruman>}[Araman] or Valinor, and {plunges}<LQ plunged> into the chasm SM-EX-10.9{between the shores of the earth and}<[/b]AAm[/b] beyond> the Outer Sea, and {pursues}<LQ pursued> his way alone among the grots at the roots of the earth. SM-EX-10.95{There sometimes he {wandrers}<LQ wandered> long}<[/b]AAm[/b] There he would oft wander long, and late would return >, and stars that had taken hiding there {flee}<LQ fled> before him into the upper air. Yet it {happens}<LQ happened> at times that he came above Valinor while the Sun {is}<LQ was> still there, and he descended and {meets}<LQ met> his beloved, for they left their vessels for a space; then there is great joy, and Valinor {is}<LQ was> filled with silver and gold, and the {Gods}[Valar] {laugh}<LQ laughed> recalling the mingling of the light long ago, when Laurelin flowered and Telperion was in bud.
§79 Still therefore SM-EX-10.97<[/b]AAm[/b] , after the Long Night,> the light of Valinor {is}<LQ was> greater and fairer than upon Middle-earth, because the Sun {resteth}<LQ rested> there, and the lights of heaven {draw}<LQ drew> nearer to the land in that region; moreover, the Valar {store}<LQ stored> the radiance of the Sun in many vessels, and in vats and pools for their comfort in times of dark.
After that passage I added the next snippet from MT:
Quote:
SM-EX-11 <AAm §179 But Morgoth hated the new lights and was for a while confounded by this unlooked-for stroke of the Valar.> SM-EX-11.1 <MT; 2 But Melkor, as hath been told, lusted after all light, desiring it jealously for his own. Moreover he soon perceived that in Âs there was a light that had been concealed from him, and which had a power of which he had not thought. Therefore, afire at once with desire and anger, he went to Âs{ [written above: Asa]}, and he spoke to Árië, saying: 'I have chosen thee, and thou shalt be my spouse, even as Varda is to Manwë, and together we shall wield all splendour and mastery. Then the kingship of Arda shall be mine in deed as in right, and thou shalt be the partner of my glory.'
But Árië rejected Melkor and rebuked him, saying: 'Speak not of right, which thou hast long forgotten. Neither for thee nor by thee alone was Eä made; and thou shalt not be King of Arda. Beware therefore; for there is in the heart of Âs a light in which thou hast no part, and a fire which will not serve thee. Put not out thy hand to it. For though thy potency may destroy it, it will burn thee and thy brightness will be made dark.'
Melkor did not heed her warning, but cried in his wrath: 'The gift which is withheld I take!' and he ravished Árië, desiring both to abase her and to take into himself her powers. Then the spirit of Árië went up like a flame of anguish and wrath, and departed for ever from Arda;[Footnote to the text: {[marginal note] }Indeed some say that it was released from Eä.] and the Sun was bereft of the Light of Varda, and was stained by the assault of Melkor. SM-EX-11.15{ And being for a long while without rule it flamed with excessive heat or grew too cool, so that grievous hurt was done to Arda and the fashioning of the world was marred and delayed, until with long toil the Valar made a new order.[Footnote to the text: [marginal note] Also some of the Wise have said that the ordering of Arda, as to the placing and courses of its parts, was disarrayed by Melkor, so that the Earth was at times drawn too near to the Sun, and at others went too far off.]} But even as Árië foretold, Melkor was burned and his brightness darkened, and he gave no more light, but light pained him exceedingly and he hated it.> SM-EX-11.2<LT; The End of the Tales {Telimektar and Ingil pursue him, and they remain now in the sky to ward it, and Melko stalks high above the air seeking ever to do a hurt to the Sun and Moon and stars (eclipses, meteors). He is continually frustrated, but on his first attempt - saying that the Gods stole his fire for its making - he upset the Sun, so that Urwendi fell into the Sea, and the Ship fell near the ground, scorching regions of the Earth.} The clarity of the Sun's radiance has not been so great since, and something of {magic}[entchantment] has gone from it. Hence it is, and long has been, that the {fairies}[Elves] dance and sing more sweetly and can the better be seen by the light of the Moon - because of the death of {Urwendi}[Árië]. The 'Rekindling of the {Magic}[Entchanted] Sun' refers in part to the Trees and in part to {Urwendi}[Árië].
{Fionwe}[Eonwë]'s {rage}/was anraged/ and {grief.}[griefed] SM-EX-11.25<LT; The Tale of the Sun and the Moon , for he had concieved a great love for that bright maiden long ago, and her loveliness{ now}, when bathed in fire she sate as the radient mistress of the Sun, set him aflame with the eagerness of the {Gods}[Valar].> In the end he will slay {Melko}[Morogth].>
SM-EX-11.3 <MT; 2 Outline But Melkor gathered in the Void spirits of cold SM-EX-11.32{&c.} and<AAm shadow> and suddenly assailed {it}the Moon, b]SM-EX-11.34[/b] <AAm and there was strife in Ilmen beneath the paths of the stars, >driving out the {Vala}[Maiar] Tilion. The Moon was thereafter {long}[a] while steerless and vagrant and called Rána{ (neuter)} SM-EX-11.36 <LQ the wayward>.>
{But}Therefore the light is not the light which came from the Trees before the poisoned lips of {Ungoliantë}[Ungoliant] touched them. That light lives now only in the SilmarilsSM-EX-11.37<AAm and they are lost> {. Gods and Elves, therefore, look forward yet to a time when the Elder Sun and Moon, which are the Trees, may be rekindled}<LQ ; though there shall yet come a time, maybe, when they are found again and their fire released, and the ancient joy and glory return. Ulmo foretold to the Valar that this would only come to pass through the aid, frail though it might seem, of the second race of earth, the Younger Children of Ilúvatar. But Manwë alone heeded his words at that time; for the Valar were still wroth because of the ingratitude of the Noldor, and the cruel slaying at the Haven of the Swans. Moreover, all save Tulkas for a while were in doubt, fearing the might and cunning of Morgoth. {Therefore at this time they fortified all Valinor anew, and set a sleepless watch upon the mountain-walls, which now they raised, east, north, and south, to sheer and dreadful height. Their outer sides were dark and smooth, without ledge or foothold for aught save birds, and fell in precipices with faces hard as glass; their tops were crowned with ice. No pass led through them save only at the Kalakilya wherein stood the mound of Kor. This they could not close because of the Eldar who were faithful; for all those of Elvish race must breathe at whiles the outer air of Middle-earth, nor could they wholly sunder the Teleri from their kin.}
SM-EX-11.4 <AAm But SM-EX-11.42{Arien}[Âs] Morgoth feared with a great fear, and dared not to come nigh her, having indeed no longer the power. For as he grew in malice, and sent forth from himself the evil that he conceived in lies and creatures of wickedness, his power passed into them and was dispersed, and he himself became ever more earth-bound, unwilling to issue from his dark strongholds. With shadow therefore he hid himself and his servants from SM-EX-11.44{Arien}[Âs], the glance of SM-EX-11.46{whose eyes}[which] they could not long endure, and the lands nigh his dwelling were shrouded in fumes and great clouds.>
SM-EX-11.5 <MT; 2 When {they}the Valar perceived that Melkor would now turn darkness and night to his purposes, as he had aforetime sought to wield flame, they were grieved; for it was a part of their design that there should be change and alteration upon Earth, and neither day perpetual nor night without end.[footnote to the text: For it is indeed of the nature of Eä and the Great History that naught may stay unchanged in time, and things which do so, or appear to do so, or endeavour to remain so, become a weariness, and are loved no longer (or are at best unheeded).] For by Night the Children of Arda should know Day, and perceive and love Light; and yet Night should also in its kind be good and blessed, being a time of repose, and of inward thought; and a vision also of things high and fair that are beyond Arda, but are veiled by the splendour of Anar. But Melkor would make it a time of peril unseen, of fear without form, an uneasy vigil; or a haunted dream, leading through despair to the shadow of Death.>
SM-EX-11.6 <MT; 2 Outline The Sun remained a Lonely Fire, polluted by Melkor, but after the death of the Two Trees}Then Tilion returned to the Moon, which remained therefore an enemy of Melkor and his servants and creatures of night — and so[u] was[/b] beloved of Elves later{ &c}.>SM-EX-11.7 <AAm {Then he assailed Tilion, sending spirits of shadow against him, and there was strife in Ilmen beneath the paths of the stars, and}[u]And so[/b] Tilion was the victor: as he ever yet hath been, though still the pursuing darkness overtakes him at whiles.>
SM-EX-11.8<AAm §180 But seeing the assault upon SM-EX-11.85<Árië and> Tilion the Valar were in doubt,…
SM-EX-11.1: The assault on Árië was denied in AAM and LQ, but MT is the later text. The problem is that in MT the attack is much earlier when Melkor is not so much sunk to the Morgoth state. But is he already so much down, that he cannot ravish a Maiar? I don’t think so.

SM-EX-11.15: This ‘explanations’ for desserts and cold times, must go. They clearly belong to a round earth version.

SM-EX-11.2: We have used the references to the ‘magic sun’ already, so here with Árië gone we have the reason why the sun has lost the ‘magic’.

SM-EX-11.25: Árië seems to have been a hot girl! Already in LT she had tow guys loving here (with out hope).

SM-EX-11.3, SM-EX-11.32, SM-EX-11.34 and SM-EX-11.36: The Assult on Tilion is here combined from MT and AAm. The change back to the basis text brings in here the loss of Árië and Tilion from Sun and Moon as additional reason for the lesser light in Valinor.

SM-EX-11.37: Again a case were I bring the text nearer to AAm.

SM-EX-11.38: His has to come later.

SM-EX-11.4: That Morogth feared the light of the sun after the encounter with Árië is told in MT and here in AAm the reasons are given.

SM-EX-11.42, SM-EX-11.44 and SM-EX-11.46: After the encounter with Árië Morgoth and his servants have to fear the Sun (Âs) and not Arien.

SM-EX-11.5: We had inserted this earlier when Melkor destroyed the Lamps but here it fits much better.

SM-EX-11.6 & SM-EX-11.7: The time that Tilion left the Moon is much short then it was planed in MT, but that does fit our flat earth version very well, since LQ and AAm say that ‘Tilion was the victor: as he ever yet hath been’.

SM-EX-11.8: Back to AAm, but since that is not our basis text I added this marker.

SM-EX-11.85: I added the assault on Árië because it had even the greater effect.

Quote:
… Therefore in the {Kalakiryan}[Calacirya] they set strong towers and many sentinels; and at its issue upon the plains of Valimar a host was encamped; for the armories of the Valar were opened, and the Maiar {and the Sons of the Valar} were arrayed as for war.> SM-14 But the Eldar were set to guard that pass unceasingly: <LQ rebuilt with Ossë’s aid, >the fleet of the Teleri kept the shore, the remnant of the {Gnomes}[Noldor] dwelt ever in the deep cleft of the mountains{, and upon the plain of Valmar, where the pass issues into Valinor, the Lindar were camped as sentinels, that no bird nor beast nor Elf nor Man, nor any creature beside that came from Middle-earth could pass the leaguer. SM-EX-11.9<AAm Neither bird nor beast nor Elf nor Man, nor any other creature beside that dwelt in Middle-earth, could pass that leaguer.>
§80 In that time, which songs call the Hiding of Valinor, the Enchanted Isles were set, and filled with shadows and bewilderment, and all the seas about were filled with shadows; and these isles were strung across the Shadowy Seas from north to south before Tol Eressea, the Lonely Isle, is reached, sailing west; and hardly might any vessel come between them in the gloom or win through to the Bay of {Elvenhome}<LQ Eldanor>. For a great weariness comes upon mariners in that region, and a loathing of the sea; but all such as set foot upon those islands are there entrapped and wound in everlasting sleep. Thus it was that the many emissaries of the Gnomes in after days never came to Valinor - save one, the mightiest mariner of song}SM-EX-11.95<AAm §181 And in that time also, which songs call Nurtalë Valinóreva, the Hiding of Valinor, the Enchanted Isles were set, and all the seas about them were filled with shadows and bewilderment; and these isles were strung as a net in the Shadowy Seas from north unto south, before Tol Eressëa, the Lonely Isle, is reached by one sailing west. Hardly might any vessel pass between them: for in the dangerous sounds the waves sighed forever upon dark rocks shrouded in mist. And in the twilight a great weariness came upon mariners and a loathing of the Sea; but all that ever set foot upon the islands were there entrapped, and slept until the Change of the World. Thus it was that, as Mandos foretold to them in Araman, the Blessed Realm was shut against the Noldor, and of the many messengers that in after-days they sent into the West none came ever to Valinor - save one only: the mightiest mariner of song> or tale.
SM-EX-12 <LT Now when Manwë gazing in sorrow from high Taniquetil …
SM-EX-11.9 and SM-EX-11.95: If LQ is our basis text we have to show were the passages from that text have gone. And I took the last words up again into our text.

Puh, that was a long analyses and a long post. But as we both have found, this seems to be a more difficult chapter then it seems at first glance.

Respecfully
Findegil
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