[Aiwendil]

Don't know if you're still around at all, Findegil, but here are my latest thoughts on unresolved points.

BL-RG-40:

But reading this again I see that I my have a wrong pronauciation of 'Gor-THAU-r's BATS.' Which most likley is realy 'GOR-thaur's BATS.' But then it is not better than your suggestion.

Ah, I see the confusion. I had indeed assumed the stress is on the first syllable in 'Gorthaur'. And this is the pronunciation that Encyclopedia of Arda gives, for what that's worth.

So, I think that in terms of stress and syllable-count, 'Sauron' and 'Gorthaur' are identical.

BL-SL-05:

We know that Morgoth heard of Luthiens wandering, so why shouldn't Sauron have heard? And since he is talking about a border skirmish at Doriath why not mention her?

It still seems a little awkward to me. I suppose that a train of thought leading from a skirmish on the border of Thingol's realm to Thingol's daughter makes some sense. But what still seems out of place then is:

Why laughs he not to think of his lord
crushing a maiden in his hoard,

In the original, he has just been talking about Boldog's mission to bring Luthien to Morgoth. But in our proposed version, no one has yet said anything about her being in Morgoth's hoard. What about:

'Boldog, I heard, was lately slain
warring on the borders of that domain
where Robber Thingol and outlaw folk
cringe and crawl beneath elm and oak
in drear Doriath. Heard ye not then
of that pretty fay, of Lúthien?
BL-SL-05 {Her body is fair, very white and fair.
Morgoth would possess her in his lair.
Boldog he sent, but Boldog was slain:
strange ye were not in Boldog's train.}
Fierce is your chief, his frown is grim.
Little Lúthien! What troubles him?
{Why laughs he not to think of his lord
crushing a maiden in his hoard,
that foul should be what once was clean,
that dark should be where light has been?}

Thus we remove the non sequitur but retain the mention of Luthien as a way of eliciting a reaction from Beren.

Also, I think BL-EX-10 can in fact be improved slightly further with:

<GA But Finrod, ere he bade farewell,
{But this I say}spoke thus to Celegorm the fell,
by{ the} sight{ that is given me} allowed him in {this} that hour:
{that}By neither {thou}thine nor any power
{son of Fëanor}shall thy kin {regain the Silmarils ever unto world's end.}their Jewels regain
before the End; yea, all in vain
you swore. And this that we now seek
shall come {indeed} from 'neath the triple peak,
but never to your hands shall fall.
Nay, your oath shall devour you all,
Fëanor's sons, and {deliver} to other {keeping} care
shall Lúthien’s great{the} bride-price {of Lúthien}bear.'>

This takes ever so slightly more liberty with the text from GA but makes the third and eighth lines of the section better metrically.