[antoine2]

-- 1 --

Specific Changes:

quote:
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FG-TG-04
{, and it was made of Gnome-steel overlaid with silver; but his helm was adorned with a device of metals and jewels like to two swan-wings, one on either side, and a swan's wing was wrought on his shield}
Use previously
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I'm not sure what this change means, so I ommited it, in this draft.

it s used in Transition part, see FG-T-12.


-- 2 --

I agree to deletet FG-M-09.


-- 3 --

In this one, I have deleted the {sons of the} Orcs part, it seems out of touch with the legendarium.

very good !
I agree


-- 4 --

I would rather use the Q77 instead of the Quenta. In the Quenta, there is no mention of the Fall of Doriath nor of Nargothrond.

quote:
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Tidings were brought by Thorondor Lord of Eagles of the fall of Nargothrond, and after of the slaying of Thingol and of Dior his heir, and of the ruin of Doriath; but Turgon shut his ear to word of the woes without, and vowed to march never at the side of any son of Fëanor; and his people he forbade ever to pass the leaguer of the hills.
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I agree, but wait opinion of Lindil and co [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]


-- 5 --

lindil and Aiwendil Suggestions:


quote:
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This whole section feels wrong. More specifically, there is not the same sense of vigilance we find in UT as he enters through the gates. There is a boasting that seems out of place for any of the latter elves, and the reference to the gondolindrim guarding the encircling mntns themselves w/ no mention of the eagles except that some had better eyesight!
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I agree with Aiwendil that the boasting is not necessarily out of order.
I really liked your suggestion that the eagles are missing and that Aiwendil's suggestion is a good one:
FG-TG-03.5

quote:
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[And no spy or creature out of Angband could come there because of the vigilance of the eagles, and Morgoth was thwarted in the fulfillment of his designs.]
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*********


-- 6 --

Hmmmmm. I rather we keep the original reference and eliminate the mention of the wings or say that Turgon gave to Tuor a gift of an axe and a helm.

You forgot find some armor and some helm (Ulmo's gift) : see transition part.

-- 7 --

FG-TG-05.5
Now came days when Tuor had dwelt {among the {Gondothlim}[in Gondolin] {many years}[for seven years]. Long had he known and cherished a love for the king's daughter,

I agree.

-- 8 --

FG-TG-01.5
But Turgon, who knew that Tuor, mortal as he was, had the favour of the Valar, marking his stout glance and the power of his voice sent to him and bade him dwell in Gondolin and be in his favour, and abide even within the royal halls if he would, [for Tuor was held in honour, for his kindreds sake]. GA.

i agree

[ July 21, 2003: Message edited by: antoine2 ]