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Old 03-15-2004, 08:33 PM   #147
Eidolon of a Took
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Join Date: Sep 2002
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Soon after becoming acquainted with the floor, and becoming rather more well acquainted with each other than they'd have liked, the Three-Females-Eight-Males-And-Two-Its-Ship disentangled themselves from each other and brushed the dirt and cobwebs from their accoutrements and coiffures. (That is, all except Earnur, who was more or less at the bottom of the pile, as usual, and was unconscious, as usual — and the animals, who didn’t have accoutrements or coiffures.)

It took a few moments longer than was strictly necessary for Orogarn Two and Kuruharan to disentangle from Merisu. Vogonwë, ever the unlucky one, had become entangled with Grrralph and the Gateskeeper, and the three of them were trying to remedy the situation in as swift and manly (or half-elvenly, thingwraithly, and wizardly) fashion possible. Vogonwë and the Gateskeeper were also slightly revolted to come in contact with Grrralph in particular, and though Vogonwë later denied this, he ran around the room flapping his arms and screaming, “His eyes! His eyes! Oh my Eru! His eeeeeeeyes!” The Gateskeeper invoked a strong cleansing spell to remove any spíwarë, trôján horses, or cűkies he may have caught from touching Grrralph’s cloak.

Pimpi swooped to the ground, cradled in the scaly embrace of Chrsyi, who was telling her how well he could have flown out of there to safety had she not been impeding his wings. The horses consisted of a fourth grouping; Falafel kicked Pinkjin in the nether regions, and the twins Tweedledee and Tweedledum lay there blinking at each other in a fashion that others would have labeled blankly. They were actually sending intricate messages to each other in that special way twins do:

Tweedledee: Grass?

Tweedledum: Where?

Tweedledee: Grass?

Tweedledum: Where?

Et cetera.

The cart, unfortunately, shattered when it hit the pavement, and the Thighs rolled to a dank and dreary corner of the room.

When Vogonwë came to his senses, he stopped and realized that he did not know where Harvey was. This prompted him to run around the room flapping his arms and screaming, “Where did he go? Where did he go? Oh my Eru! Where did he goooo?” He stopped in front of Chrysophylax and grabbed his lapels (or rather, some loose flabs of scaly skin on the sides of his neck) and said, “Have you eaten him, you stupid beast?”

Chrysi merely blinked and belched out a sulfurous stream of air from deep in his stomach, and Vogonwë tripped and fell backwards; coughing, sputtering and hacking for a moment or two. Pimpi rushed over to thump his back and say, “In with Mister Good Air, out with Mister Bad Air, in with Mister Good Air, out with Mister Bad Air,” until he had recovered enough to wheeze:

“You didn’t put him in a stew, did you?”

Pimpi thumped his back a little bit harder than was strictly necessary and said, “Pull yourself together, Vogie! We’ve been down here for a grand total of five minutes, give or take a few. How could I have put your rabbit in a stew?”

“You’re right, it was the dragon,” Vogonwë said, fingering his arrows (which had managed to stay innocuously in their quiver despite the fall — thank Eru for small favors.)

“Actually, I think he was squashed and then rolled to a thin paste by one of the Entish Thighbeams,” Pimpi said, patting his arm sympathetically.

For a moment Vogonwë looked as if he were going to be seriously ill, but then Pimpi began to laugh in a mischievous, hobbity chuckle, which sounded somewhat like an evil chortle. She drew Harvey out from one of her skirt pockets. “There you go, sweetie. I found him trying to wiggle out from underneath Earnur.” She paused and looked down at the tender little animal nibbling on an alfalfa sprout in her hands, and her desire could not have been clearer had Vogonwë retrieved a magick marker from his pen box and written hasenpfeffer across her forehead.

Vogonwë snatched the bunny and cradled it in his arms. “That great smelling lump of a heavy oaf. He had better not have bruised Harvey.” In his mind’s eye he saw Gravlox holding Harvey and exclaiming ”How did he get these bruises?” in an Orcsome roar, and he shuddered. Luckily, Earnur was in la la land and did not hear the insult, though it is not clear how he would have reacted had he been in clearer state of mind. Experts speculate that he might not have even realized the assessment pertained to him, as “clearer” is, of course, a relative term.

Last edited by Diamond18; 03-15-2004 at 08:39 PM.
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