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Old 03-10-2003, 04:32 PM   #37
antoine2
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Join Date: Jun 2002
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Sting

I post some of my work merge with Maédhros
and Awendil Idea.

AINU-01
This was made by Rúmil of Túna in the Elder
Days. {It is here written as it was spoken in
Eressëa to Ælfwine by Pengoloð the Sage.} To it
are added the further words that Pengoloð /*the Sage*\
{spoke} [wrote] {at that time} concerning the Valar, the
Eldar and the Atani; of which more is said hereafter


AINU-02
{First he recited to him the Ainulindalë as Rúmil made it.}

AINU-03
But {thou must understand, Ælfwine, that} when the Ainur had beheld this habitation in a vision
I’m just following the Published Silmarillion here.

AINU-04
But the other Ainur looked upon this habitation in the Halls of {Aman} [Eä]
Here the reading of D is "Halls of Aman", which was not corrected to "Ea" with the general change Aman>Ea. Christopher notes that this "was obviously an oversight". It should be corrected to "Halls of Ea".

AINU-05
Now to water had that Ainu whom {we} [the Elves] call Ulmo

AINU-06
but the delight and pride of Aulë was in the deed of making, and in the thing made, and neither in possession nor in his own mastery; wherefore he {gives} [gave] and {hoards} [hoarded] not, and is free from care, passing ever on to some new work.
Changing of the tenses of the verbs: gives to gave, hoards to hoarded.

AINU-07
Behold the snow, and the cunning work of frost! [Behold the towers and mansions of ice!]
Christopher notes the omission of "Behold the towers and mansions of ice!" and says that it may have been inadvertant. We must decide whether to add this back in or not.
I would leave it out.

AINU-08
And therefore{, Ælfwine, we name them} [they are named] the Valar, the Powers of the World.
Following the Published Silmarillion.

AINU-09
But {think not, Ælfwine, that} the shapes wherein the Great Ones array themselves are at all times like unto the shapes of kings and queens of the Children of Ilúvatar

AINU-10
Great Ones array themselves are at all times like unto the shapes of kings and queens of the Children of Ilúvatar; for at whiles they may clothe them in their own thought, made visible in forms terrible and wonderful.[Note *]{And I myself, long years agone, in the land of the Valar have seen Yavanna in the likeness of a Tree; and the beauty and majesty of that form could not be told in words, not unless all the things that grow in the earth, from the least unto the greatest, should sing in choir together, making unto their queen an offering of song to be laid before the throne of Ilúvatar.}

(Note *) /*And I myself, long years agone, in the land of the Valar have seen Yavanna in the likeness of a Tree; and the beauty and majesty of that form could not be told in words, not unless all the things that grow in the earth, from the least unto the greatest, should sing in choir together, making unto their queen an offering of song to be laid before the throne of Ilúvatar.*\ [Quoth Pengoloð.]

I regret losing the bit about Yavanna taking the form of a tree, to use Pengoloð insert can be a solution.

AINU-11
Thus began the first battle of the Valar and Melkor for the dominion of Arda; and of those tumults {we} [the Elves] know but little; for {know thou, Ælfwine}, what {I have} [has been] declared {unto thee} is come from the Valar themselves, with whom {we of} the Eldalië spoke in the land of Valinor, and {we were} [by whom they were] instructed {by them}; but little would {they} [the Valar] ever tell of the days of war ere the coming of the Elves. But this {said Rúmil in the end of the Ainulindalë which I have recounted to thee} [is told among the Eldar]
Here I mostly follow Christopher. Some of the changes might seem a little daring, but I think they are, at the worst, covered by the principle that allows us to use text created by Christopher Tolkien. If we end up removing the Pengolodh sections at the end, we may also want to remove this, as it is clear in Ainulindale D that these are the words of Pengolodh, not of Rumil. Or we might follow the '77, leaving this in, as emended, and assuming that these actually are Rumil's words.

AINU-12
{But of all such matters, Ælfwine, others shall tell thee, or thou shalt read in other lore; for it is not my part at this time to instruct thee in the history of the Earth.} And now behold! here is the habitation of the Children of Ilúvatar established at the last in the deeps of Time and amidst the innumerable stars. And here are the Valar, the Powers of the World, contesting for the possession of the jewel of Ilúvatar{; and thus thy feet are on the beginning of the road}.
This eliminates only that which has no significance outside of the Pengolodh-Aelfwine framework. We might also go with Christopher Tolkien's emendation: "And thus was the habitation of the Children of Iluvatar established at the last in the Deeps of Time and amidst the innumerable stars."

AINU-13
/*End of the Ainulindalë {spoken} [written] by Rúmil {to Ælfwine} [.]*\

Here are the words of Pengoloð {to Ælfwine}
{And when he had ended the Ainulindalë, such as Rúmil had made it, Pengoloð the Sage paused a while; and Ælfwine said to him:} Little{, you say, would} [was tell by] the Valar {tell} to the Eldar of the days before their coming[.] {: but do not the wise among you know more of those ancient wars than Rúmil has here set forth? Or will you not tell me} [But it can be write] more of the Valar as they were when first {your} [the] kindred [of the Noldor] beheld and knew them{?}[.]
{And Pengoloð answered: Much of what I know or have learned from the elders in lore, I have written; and what I have written thou shalt read, if thou wilt, when thou hast learned better the tongue of the Noldor and their scripts. For these matters are too great and manifold to be spoken or to be taught in speech within the brief patience and heedfulness of those of mortal race. But some little more I may tell to thee now, since thou askest it of me.} This tale {I have heard also among} /*have learned from*\ the lore masters [of the Noldor] in ages past. {For they tell us that the}[
The] war began before Arda was full-shaped …

Editorial introduction of Pengoloð section

AINU-14
{Palúrien} [Kementári]
§31b & §35

AINU-15
And the {children} [servants] of Manwë and Varda {are} [were] {Fionwë Úrion their son,} [Eonwë] and Ilmarë {their daughter}; and these were the {eldest} [highest] of the {children} [servants] of the Valar.
There is also the matter of tense here, which we may or may not want to address. I have taken the liberty of changing the are to were as to preserve tenses.
I change eldest by highest, there is not notion of birth and age for the Ainur .

AINU-16
Now all is said {to thee, Ælfwine, for this present,} concerning the manner of the Earth and its rulers in the time before days and ere the world became such as the Children have known it. {Of these thou hast not asked, but a little I will say and so make an end.}
This must be removed.

AINU-17
{End of the Ainulindalë spoken by Rúmil to Ælfwine}
Use previously

[ March 10, 2003: Message edited by: antoine2 ]

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