NA-RG-38: I don't know whether "seven" had some definite reference in the original; in any case, you're right that if we count properly, the number is suitable.
NA-RG-44: Okay, we can go with "fearful".
A few more comments for now:
NA-RG-57: I'm at a loss here; I can't think of anything except:
Quote:
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NA-RG-57{Flinding}[Gwindor] {go-Fuilin} the faithful, to his feet striding.
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But I think that now we are really stretching the "faithful" epithet.
NA-RG-58: I think that
Quote:
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Whither, O NA-RG-58{Flinding}[friend], our feet now turn we,
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. . . is fine now, since he really is Turin's friend. But no need for capitalization.
NA-RG-60: A straightforward Flinding>Gwindor substitution works here, I think:
Quote:
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said NA-RG-60{Flinding}[Gwindor], 'my feet would fain wander,
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NA-SL-12: I think we must phrase this:
Quote:
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of Feanor}[that Finrod] founded {when they fled southward}] following Thingol;
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. . . since alliteration on the last stress is not permitted (at least, that's my understanding). But I'm not sure that "following Thingol" is a suitable description for Finrod's founding of Nargothrond.
NA-RG-62: Here I would use "Elves" instead of "Noldor", since the sense is not hurt by it.
NA-RG-63: Again, I think "Gwindor" is a suitable substitute for "Flinding", leaving simple alliteration.
NA-RG-64: Perhaps we could use:
Quote:
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NA-RG-64{Flinding}[Gwindor] {go-Fuilin}, a Noldo of {the} Narog's folk {of Narog} {1780}
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NA-SL-12.5: A minor typo; should be:
Quote:
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and NA-SL-12.5{the son of Húrin}[a son of Men] his sworn comrade
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NA-RG-65, -67: I'm at a loss for both of these.