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In regards to Morgoth's 'might' and when the Valar would choose to attack. It is I think specious to say that they had to wait. Why? they did not have to wait in the war of the powers?
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Well, if they didn't have to wait, then why did they? Feanor didn't lead the Noldor our of Valinor the minute after Melkor killed his father. He went home, and then came back to get his people.
The Valar had enough time to start acting. They could've been organizing their forces and sending word out to the leaders that they were going to move in on Melkor. If they were going to immediately go after Melkor, they could've said something instead of just sitting there.
I honestly believe that if the Valar would've immediately stood up and said something like "Feanor, don't go running off by yourself. We're going to go take care of Morgoth right away, you can go with us and fight him", I think Feanor's misguided anger towards them would've been appeased.
Plus, if they had intended on making war on Melkor immediately, they would've told the Teleri to let the Noldor hitch a quick ride so they could start the fight against him.
No, I don't believe the Valar ever seriously entertained the thought of going to war with Melkor immediately. If we think along the lines of what phantom said about fulfilling ones destiny and playing ones part, then the Valar knew they were supposed to wait, just as the Noldor knew they were supposed to go. Ideally, neither should have hindered each other.