[Nogrod]

The men of Númenor consider themselves a rare if not unique people – and they are right in a sense. They share the original capacities of the first men; endurance, strength, stamina, character and size, but unlike their ancestors, they are also refined, literate, sophisticated, proud and well, just cool. And they know that the mankind has fallen after the fall of Númenor: after the Second Age the world has been waning and so has the race of men producing ever lesser and lesser men. The exceptional majesty king Elessar showed in the third age in comparison to other men of his age made the old kings and queens of Númenor shake their heads and sigh after the glory of their times totally lost in this world. To Númenorians Elessar’s character looks as commanding as a wannabe teenage-knight’s stature who had to pray the stars to enter the Númenorean cavalry’s lowest ranks in their time.

That of course is their opinion. An opinion of a proud people, but not without a string of truth in it.

Númenor was the powerhouse of football during the first Arda Cups 08-09, getting into the bronze match on -08 and winning the title on -09 with a dream team rarely seen. After that is has been less graceful for the Númenorians, even if most nations and teams would be proud of the record of getting into the quarterfinals on two years in a row. But to Númenorians that has not been good enough. The Númenorians care for the win, and only for the win.

There was an interesting article in the Armenelos Post last week, where the editors noted that the only win in the Arca Cup to a Númenorean team (team Armenelos) came on a year when Elros was not himself in the team (-09). And in the fourth place winning side from -08 Elros was a goalkeeper – since replaced by much sharper Tar-Atanamir who has been consistently one of the best goalies in all tournaments after that. So how about it was time to show the door to the otherwise highly esteemed king and let the sporting success prevail once more?

This understandably caused a huge stir on the island of divided loyalties. Even if the strong ties of blood and pride bring the númenorians together, the issue of loyalties and the shared history of the tears shed takes them apart from each other at the same time. And the suggestion of sacking Elros wasn’t going to go down well with the “elf-friends” – while it was strongly applauded in the ranks of the “King’s Men”.

Soon it became obvious that the row was getting out of the hand as street-fights and open brawls in other public places were reported in ever shortening intervals. It was then that the great press conference was held at Armenelos yesterday.

And AKM was there, naturally.



The Númenorian investment group, Meneltarma Capital was represented by it’s co-chairs Ar-Pharazôn and Tar Atanamir. Elros was there as well as was the great Tar Minastir.


Ar-Pharazôn: On behalf of Meneltarma Capital I bid you welcome to this short press conference. We wish to assure you all Númenoreans, that there is no ill will or strife between our best players or uncertainty with our financial interests. But because of financial limitations we have made some decisions that may not please all of you, but which were forced on us.

Tar Atanamir: Yes. But we’re still building back the legendary team Armenelos for this year, more or less in the shape it was on 08-09. Sure we’re not allowing Sauron to step into the soil of this island anymore and king Elros has begged to be relieved…

Elros: That’s true. I have some plans of my own. And I assure you the article on Armenelos Post had nothing to do with it… And I’m actually staying as a minority shareholder of the Menetarma Capital. So I will support the decisions it makes and will stand behind the Númenorian excellence in football.

Tar Minastir: You know my credentials my fellow countrymen. I’m not going to play for team Armenelos this year either, and I know it is a big disappointement to many. But you can cheer for me and my good friends; the old war-horse Tar Ciryatan, Tar Meneldur the astronomer and his foresighted son Tar Aldarion on another team we have a nice holding as an investment group as well.

Ar-Pharazôn: Yes indeed. With the decision of the Meneltarma Capital we have decided to divide the talent of our island funding a few players to join a team of seafarers in the making under the captaincy of none else than Ulmo himself. So all the money by you small investors will be channelled to the greater glory of Númenor, just in two different ways, with team Armenelos and the Sea-team, whatever their name will be in the end.

Tar Atanamir: I am proud to say that even with these traito… erm… trades to Ulmo’s team, team Armenelos will refuse to go down to any team in this year’s cup.

Ar-Pharazôn: But we also wish you all to support both teams with Númenorean talent in them. We’re all of the same family. Aren’t we Elros?

Elros: For the honour of Númenor!

Everyone (suddenly standing): For the honour of Númenor!

Romenna Herald: Tar Minastir is undoubtedly one of our shiniest players, and he is taking that much of grace with him to Ulmo, and even Elros is not playing for us? Do we have any Good players left in our team of the island?

Ar-Pharazôn: Those reneg… eh… renaissance talents sure are a loss, but Tar Telperiën will lead our defence once again and the Lord of the West, Ar Adunakhôr, will help score the goals.

Tar Atanamir: And you forget the brilliance of Tar Ancalimon, Tar Calmacil and Ar Gimilzôr who formed the backbone of our midfield on 08-09. They’re back in those positions to make us run the game once more – like we used to.

The AKM: But who will feed you Mr. Pharazôn and your mate Adunakhôr? Sauron was the organizer and the passing machine on the legendary -09 team, and Elros did that job last year with Westernesse team. Who will fill that gap? Surely your team is great: an Arda-class goalkeeper, solid defence, holding midfield and great strikers, but you need someone to organise the game and feed you guys in the front to score, don’t you? Who’s taking that?

Ar-Pharazôn: A Númenorian will always rise to the occasion. Don’t you outlanders worry about that.



The AKM will leave its educated readers the drawing of conclusions from that press-meeting as it doesn’t want to endanger it’s good relations with the Númenorian hegemony. But whatever the inner rifts between the islanders, they have the talent and the capital to run far in the tournament this year as well. That is one thing there will be no doubt about.