While working on other texts I found that I possibly over did it in the intro to the
Narn. I eliminated all references to English even so some were to the actual text we produce. Since our Product is clearly in English we should probably keep these references. The second § taken von
Aelfwine & Dírhaval A would read then:
Quote:
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This version into 'modern' English, that is forms of English intelligible to living users of the English tongue (who have some knowledge of letters, and are not limited to the language of daily use from mouth to mouth) does not attempt to imitate the idiom of {Ælfwine, nor that of} the Elvish which often shows through especially in the dialogue. But since it is even to Elves now 'a tale of long ago', and depicts high and ancient persons and their speech (such as Thingol and Melian), there{ is in Ælfwine's version, and clearly} was in {Dírhavel}[Dírhaval]'s day{,} much archaic language, of words and usage, and the older and nobler Elves do not speak in the same style as Men, or in quite the same language as that of the main narrative; there are therefore here retained similar elements. It is for this reason that, for example, Thingol's speech is not that of our present day: for indeed the speech of Doriath, whether of the king or others, was even in the days of Túrin more antique than that used elsewhere. One thing (as Mîm observed) of which Túrin never rid himself, despite his grievance against Doriath, was the speech he had acquired during his fostering. Though a Man, he spoke like an Elf of the Hidden Kingdom, which is as though a Man should now appear, whose speech and schooling until manhood had been that of some secluded country where the English had remained nearer that of the court of Elizabeth I than of Elizabeth II.>
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Since these changes wer never discussed throughly, it seems time to do so. Up to now we skipt the reference to English in the first sentence by replacing it by 'language' and we skipt the comparision of Túrins spech with that of a man of the time of Elizabth I. But I think both is unneccessary. When we take up some linguistic stuff as we probably may do, then we will keep English aquivalances of meaning or sound for sure. Therefore I think we should keep it here as well.
Respectfully
Findegil