Okay, you've outlined the character of Amroth quite well. Let me try Tharonwe.
Tharonwe is justified in his own mind, to take the actions he takes, because he is convinced that he has been wronged. He does not see himself as evil, but as doing what is necessary since middle earth does not converge to bring about that which he considers to be just and fair: namely, Nimrodel to him, and Amroth out of the picture.
He considers all non-Elvish life-forms to be inferior, and values them little; nevertheless, he is aware that Amroth does not see other life-forms this way, and counts on him to care what happens to humans, horses, and even dogs. He will test Amroth in this way, and expects that Amroth's warm heart will keep him from allowing Tharonwe to do much harm - because Tharonwe does not care to do much harm, only what is necessary to achieve the necessary outcome. Believe it or not, when and if Amroth refuses to bend in the face of Mellonin's defacing, Leafa's injury, and Gwyllion's death, Tharonwe will believe that Amroth is ignoble, and does not deserve Nimrodel, if he ever did.
Let me re-iterate: Tharonwe does not do violence or lie any more than seems necessary.
All that having been said, Option 1 seems workable, but not in terms of Tharonwe lying fast and hard enough; rather, seeing himself as actually more noble than Amroth, because Amroth does not do what must be done in the face of necessity, as does Tharonwe. Amroth is unreasonable and arrogant and selfish, in Tharonwe's lights, to allow the women to be victimized all for the sake of getting Nimrodel back; and therefore, Tharonwe will feel all the more justified in "punishing" Amroth for his wrongfulness. And then he can think of calling up Mellondu, and breeding mutiny among the human men.
What do you think?
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