I found a slightly different copy of this in some comments on a comic strip, and they had a few different ones.
Quote:
Ask the nearest ring-nut if he thinks Gandalf went to Hogwarts
At some point during the movie, stand up and shout: "I must go! Middle Earth needs me!" and run and try to jump into the screen. After bouncing off, return quietly to your seat.
At the end, complain that Gollum was offensive to Ethiopians.
When Shelob appears, pinch the guy in front of you on the back of the neck.
Ask people around you who they think is the next "Terminator" sent from the Middle Earth of the future to assassinate Frodo Baggins.
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Here's the link in case you want to see it.
Link
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Do not trifle with Dragons, as you are small, and crunchy, and taste good with ketchup.
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