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Old 05-09-2018, 03:14 PM   #2
Shade of Carn Dūm
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Excellent chapter! Anything to which I do not respond, I agree with.

AE-SL-05: This footnote is actually Christopher's, and feels too commentative. I agree that the information is worth keeping, but I would edit it thus:
[Footnote: (Sīr) Angren was the Elvish name of the river Isen. Ras Morthil AE-SL-05{, a name not otherwise found, must be}was the great headland at the end of the northern arm of the Bay of Belfalas, which was also called Andrast (Long Cape). The reference to "the country of Amroth where the Nandor Elves still dwell" {can be taken to imply}shows that the tale of Aldarion and Erendis was written down in Gondor before the departure of the last ship from the haven of the Silvan Elves near Dol Amroth in the year 1981 of the Third Age {; see pp. 252 ff}.]
I moved the marker to the beginning of the footnote. I feel that this version turns Christopher Tolkien's comments into an in-universe narrator's comments (possibly Bilbo, or Findegil the scribe) and works better in the scope of the project.

BL-HL-07: I am not sure this headline fits. This is a very strange heading to put anywhere, since it conveys nothing about the story. It's only used in UT because the further course of the narrative is so unclear, so CT sets it apart with the headline, but in our version, we've made it clearer, so now the heading seems out of place. Are you sure we need it?

AE-SL-43: I use this marker because there is none other at the place. But I wish to refer to this section's use of two alternate stories. Do we wish to give both versions? I personally find it somewhat unorthodox to do so, since this is the only time in the entire project where two alternate courses of truth would be given thus. I personally think we should pick one.

AE-SL-44: I think, just as I said last note, that we should give only one version. I chose the version involving Soronto, since there was hints earlier that he would become important once again before the end, and without these versions, he would not even reenter the story. Therefore I combined both versions involving Soronto thus:
It was however to Hallacar that Ancalimė was wedded in the end. AE-SL-44.1 {From one version it appears that the persistence of Hallacar in his suit despite her rejection of him, and the urging of the Council that she choose a husband for the quiet of the realm, led to their marriage not many years after their first meeting among the flocks in Emeriė. But elsewhere it is said that she}She remained unmarried so long that her cousin Soronto, relying on the provision of the new law, called upon her to surrender the Heirship, and {that} she then married Hallacar in order to spite Soronto. AE-SL-44.2 {In yet another brief notice it is implied that she wedded Hallacar after Aldarion had rescinded the provision,}She did this also in order to put an end to {Soronto's}his hopes of becoming King if {Ancalimė}she died childless.
AE-SL-44.3 {However this may be, the story is clear that} Ancalimė ...
These were the only ones I felt the need to comment on. Marvelous job Fin! This was a very long work, and the ending was quite difficult to wrangle. The Druedain additions were great! I hadn't thought to include them before!

Last edited by ArcusCalion; 05-09-2018 at 03:23 PM.
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