Lord of the Rings by Monty Python
SCENE 1
[Enter the 9 Ringwraiths, Servants of Sauron in search of the One Ring]
[eerie music]
WITCH KING: Ni! Ni! Ni! Ni!
GOLLUM: Nooo…who are yousss?
WITCH KING: We are the Nazgul, Servants of Sauron!
GOLLUM: No! Not the Nazgul, Servants of Sauron!
WITCH KING: The same!
GOLLUM: What issss it you wantsss ?…yes
WITCH KING: We are the Seekers of the One Ring of Power
GOLLUM: My precioussss, yesss…..
WITCH KING: Whats that?
GOLLUM: Whatsss isss what?
WITCH KING: Your precious. What is it you speak of?
GOLLUM: uhhh nothingsss.. yesss…
WITCH KING: Then you leave us no choice, we shall unleash the most powerful weapon of the Dark Lord, Sauron upon thee. [Witch King snaps his fingers]
8 RINGWRAITHS: Ni! Ni! Ni! Ni!
GOLLUM: Noooo, sssstopss it!
WITCH KING: Out with it.
GOLLUM: Precioussss is ring.
WITCH KING: The One Ring ?
GOLLUM: Preciousss is one ring, not two!
WITCH KING: Where is it?
GOLLUM: I don not knowssss
WITCH KING: [begins to snap his fingers]
GOLLUM: Bagginsss! SsssshIre!!
[eerie music]
[The 9 Ringwraiths depart to the Shire]
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"It needs more to make a king than a piece of elvish glass, or a rabble such as this."
-the Mouth of Sauron
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