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Old 02-13-2013, 04:07 PM   #98
Findegil
King's Writer
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 1,694
Findegil is a guest of Tom Bombadil.
FG-C-22:
Quote:
Here in the Land of Willows where the grass is long and green −
I am fingering my harp-strings, for a wind has crept unseen
And is speaking in tree-tops, while the voices of the reeds
Are whispering reedy whispers as the sunset lights the meads;
They echo musics subtly magic that wind and waves weave − 5
It was in the Land of Nevrats that once Ulmo came at eve.
That is okay for me.

FG-D-04, -29: Okay, for me these changes seem important. So we will keep them. But reading the passage again, I think we leave FG-D-17:
Quote:
... but even as Tuor comes nigh driving the Orcs, one of those brazen snakes heaves against the western wall and a great mass of it shakes and falls, and behind comes a creature of fire and Balrogs FG-B-05 {upon}[with] it. ...
...
But so it is that few cannot fight always against the many, and Ecthelion's left arm got a sore rent from a whip of the Balrog’s and his shield fell to earth FG-D-17 { even as that dragon of fire drew nigh amid the ruin of the walls}.Then Ecthelion must lean on Tuor, and Tuor might not leave him, though the very feet of FG-D-18 the trampling beast were upon them, and they were like to be overborne: but Tuor hewed at a foot of the creature so that flame spouted forth, and that serpent screamed, lashing with its tail; and many of both Orcs and {Noldoli}[Noldor] got their death therefrom.
This was a change for clarity, as 2 §§ earlier there were two dragons mention a type 2 (mechanical bronze dragon) and a type 3 (serpant of fire). Then next we have the approach of the type 3. And after that he have Tuor hewing the foot of a dragon, which by the simple logic that the serpents of fire (type 3) have no feet must be the type 2. We did skip the mention of the type 2, but I think that is unneccessary. If we can sort this out, our readers can do the same. We should simply leave the passage as it stood in the original.

FG-C-03 KO: Okay, as no body knows, I will simply delet the KO.

Respectfully
Findegil
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