[lindil]

The Attack

FG-A-01
Now when the {seventh} summer [of the treason of Maeglin] had gone {since the treason of {Meglin} [Maeglin]},
In all chronologies from the "The Earliest Annals of Beleriand" to the last version of "The Tale of Years" Maeglin's treachery occurs the year before the fall of Gondolin, not seven years and and some months before its fall as in FG. I have slightly changed a phrase and moved its position to create the required new information.

FG-A-02 Maeglin's discovery of the hidden way:
{; and by reason of the folly of certain of the quarrymen, and yet more by reason of the loose words of certain among his tin to whom word was somewhat unwarily spoken by Tuor, he gathered a knowledge of the secret work and laid against that a plan of his own}
These words should possibly be deleted. In QS77 there is an account of the preparation of the Secret Way which ends with the words: "and no whisper of it came to Maeglin's ears." But I cannot find sources for most of this passage and suspect it to be a CT/Guy Kay editorial addition. If no-one else can find a source then the story of Maeglin's discovery should perhaps be retained.

FG-A-03 Gladness in winter:
... yet the fountains played ever on Amon {Gwareth} [Gwared]{ and the two trees blossomed}, and folk made merry till the day of terror that was hidden in the heart of {Melko} [Morgoth].
The two trees of Gondolin are now metal images, not live blossoming trees.

FG-A-04 The two festivals:
So came and passed with revelry of children the festival of {Nost-na-Lothion or} the Birth of Flowers, and the hearts of the {Gondothlim} [Gondolindrim] were uplifted for the good promise of the year; and now at length is that great feast /*Q30 they named*/ {Tarnin Austa or} the Gates of Summer near at hand.
Nost is dubious for 'birth', but could be kept as the stem still appears in "Etymologies" with meaning 'beget', but Tarnin Austa is almost certainly not valid, and so stylistically it makes sense to drop the Elvish names of both feasts.
We could possibly make keep a Sindarin name for 'Gates of Summer' using _annon_=gate, and a Sindarin form of either Q. _Laire_ or Q. _Saiwen_, just to give us another option; but I agree that deleting both names is the way to go.

FG-A-05
/*Q30 At last, and {Eärendel} [Eärendil] was then seven years of age, Morgoth was ready, and he loosed upon Gondolin his {Orcs} [Orks] and his Balrogs and his serpents; and of these, dragons of many and dire shapes {were} new devised for the taking of the city. The host of Morgoth came over the Northern hills where the height was greatest and the watch less vigilant, and it came at night at time of festival.*/ For know that on a night it was their custom to begin a solemn ceremony at midnight, continuing it even till the dawn of {Tarnin Austa} /*Q30 the Gates of Summer*/ broke, and no voice was uttered in the city from midnight till the break of day, but the {dawn} /*rising sun*/ they hailed with ancient songs /*Q30 at its uplifting*/. For years uncounted had the coming of summer thus been greeted with music of choirs, /*Q30 all the folk of Gondolin*/ standing upon their gleaming eastern wall; and now comes even the night of vigil and the city is filled with silver lamps, while in the groves upon the new-leaved trees lights of jewelled colours swing, and low musics go along the ways, but no voice sings until the dawn.
The sun has sunk beyond the hills and folk array them for the festival very gladly and eagerly − glancing in expectation to the East. {Lo!} /*Q30 But*/ even when she had gone and all was dark, a new /*Q30 red*/ light suddenly began, and a glow there was, but it {was} /*Q30 mounted*/ beyond the {northward heights} /*hills in the North and not in the East*/, and men marvelled, and there was a thronging of the walls and battlements. Then wonder grew to doubt as that light waxed and became yet redder, and doubt to dread as men saw the snow upon the mountains dyed as it were with blood. And thus it was that the fire-serpents of {Melko} [Morgoth] came upon Gondolin.
Light in the North.
For know that on a night it was their custom to begin a solemn ceremony at midnight, continuing it even till the dawn of {Tarnin Austa} the Gates of Summer broke, ...[/quote]Merging of the two accounts. I removed the word "were" as a detailed account of the devising will have already appeared from FG. This is the only place where directions in the old FG account should not be reversed.

FG-A-06
Mighty was the array of the house of the king and their colours were white and gold {and red}, and their emblems the moon and the sun {and the scarlet heart}.
The embalmed heart of Turgon's father which became his symbol early vanished from the legendarium. I suppose he could still have the heart as a symbol, but now with some other origin. But such is never mentioned. Removing all information on colors and emblems here is difficult because the information is given for every other house and at the end we are told: "This was the fashion and the array of the eleven houses of the Gondothlim with their signs and emblems, ...." Unfortunately Tolkien, so far as I know, did not create a colored heraldic design for Turgon as he did for many of the other Noldorin princes.

FG-A-07 The Comming of the Host.
And now came the Monsters across the valley /*Q30 and there was no stay in the advance of the foe until they were beneath the very walls of Gondolin*/ and the white towers of Gondolin reddened before them/*Q30 , and Gondolin was beleaguered without hope*/

Merging two accounts.

FG-A-08 Maeglin's plotting.
{Learning much of the secret delving of Tuor (yet only at the last moment had he got this knowledge and he could not discover all) he said nought to the king or any other, for it was his thought that of a surety that tunnel would go in the end toward the Way of Escape, this being the most nigh to the city, and he had a mind to use this to his good, and to the ill of the Noldoli. Messengers by great stealth he despatched to Melko to set a guard about the outer issue of that Way when the assault was made; but he} [He] himself thought now to take {Eärendel} [Eärendil] and cast him into the fire beneath the walls, and seizing Idril he would {constrain her to guide him to the secrets of the passage, that he might} win out of this terror of fire and slaughter and drag her withal along with him to the lands of {Melko} [Morgoth]{. Now Meglin was afeared that even} [with] the secret token which {Melko} [Morgoth] had given him{ would fail in that direful sack, and was minded to help that Ainu to the fulfilment of his promises of safety}.
These outer deletions need not be made if it is decided that the QS77 declaration that Maeglin did not discover the delving is taken as valid. Unless someone can find the passage that says so and is the souce of the QS77 I think they should be retained.
In any case, the last part of it is seemingly a backflash to when Maeglin first discovered the Tuor's tunnel, at which point he then, and only then, sent to Melko concerning the Way of Escape. This is odd, why wait till then to mention this possible exit? And as CT questions, who would Meglin be able to trust to send on this mission? This also depends on whether the Way of Escape is considered openable at this time, or whether all such mentions should be ignored. I think probably a separate Way of Escape discussion is needed on this theme, like Balrogs and metal dragons it is a thread of incidents that needs to be treated as a whole, and which does not effect anything else in the tale.

FG-A-09
… snakes heaves against the {western} [eastern] wall and a great mass of it shakes and falls, …

Ambiguous Balrogs

FG-B-01 Balrogs on the dragons of flame.
... and {upon} with them {rode} [came] the Balrogs {in hundreds};
Eliminates reference to Balrogs riding dragons. These Balrogs may or may not be capable of flight. Also, if we change the mechanical dragons to real ones, they may no longer serve as transport.
Possibly adding [as captains]

FG-B-02 Balrogs shoot arrows of fire.
... yet a worse matter was it that {a company} [one] of those demons climbed upon the coils of the serpents of iron and thence loosed unceasingly from {their bows and slings} [his bow] till a fire began to burn in the city to the back of the main army of the defenders.
I have changed the company of Balrogs to a single Balrog. This links to the next item. Removal of words "of iron" are per the modification of the dragons, and should not be considered part of the changes to be considered in this discussion.
I can find nothiing better to do with this passage, unless we decide to cut out Rog's slaying of a Balrog (which we may very well have to do.)

FG-B-03 Rog's men attack
... but the men of Rog leapt even upon the coils of the serpents and came at {those Balrogs} [that Balrog] and smote {them} [him] grievously, for all {they} [he] had {whips} [whip] of Same and claws of steel, and {were} [was] in stature very great. They battered {them} [him] into nought, {or} [and] catching at {their whips} [his whip] wielded {these} [it] against {them} [him], that they tore {them} [him] even as {they} [he] had aforetime torn the Gnomes; and {the number of Balrogs} that [this Balrog] perished was a marvel and dread to the hosts of Melko, for ere that day never had any of the Balrogs been slain by the hand of Elves or Men.
Then Gothmog Lord of Balrogs gathers all his demons [and monsters] that were about the city and ordered them thus: a number made for the folk of the Hammer and gave before them, but the greater company rushing upon the flank contrived to get to their backs, higher upon the coils of the drakes and nearer to the gates, so that Rog might not win back save with great slaughter among his folk.
This leaves the Rog situation as it was; I'll discuss this later. My (risky) addition to the second paragraph, I think, nicely sidesteps the question of Balrog numbers. I wonder if it is justified.

FG-B-04 Rog's slaughter
Fearful too they were for that slaughter Rog had done {amid} [to] the {Balrogs} [Balrog], {because} of those demons they had great courage and confidence of heart.
Now then the plan that they made was to hold what they had won, while those serpents of bronze and with great feet for trampling climbed slowly over {those of iron} [the others], and reaching the walls there opened a breach wherethrough the Balrogs might {ride upon} [come with] the dragons of flame …
I doubt that the first sentence should be deleted, but I can at the moment think of nothing better. At any rate, Rog, whether he kills a Balrog or not, cannot be said to have done slaughter amid them. The change in the second paragraph eliminates Balrogs riding on dragons.

FG-B-05 Entrance into the city
… and behind comes a creature of fire and Balrogs [and monsters] {upon} [with] it.
If we eliminate the dragon-riders altogether, the ‘s' on the end of ‘Balrogs' can stand. My ‘and monsters' is dubious, but follows the trend of this proposed revision. I don't think there's any problem with dropping it, though - there's no reason, even if there were only four Balrogs, that not more than one could have been in the square.

FG-B-06 Ecthelion against the Balrogs
{Of those demons of power Ecthelion slew three} [And he drove them back], for the brightness of his sword cleft the iron of them and did hurt to their fire, and they writhed
This (rather innocuous looking) bit is quite troublesome. My proposal is probably not justified, though I think would work well. Jallanite's proposal is, of course, good; but the mention of ‘three', as innocent as it looks, says things about how many Balrogs there are and aren't.

FG-B-07 The Great Market
… where a force of Orcs {led by Balrogs} came on them at unawares …
We use Jallanite first proposal

FG-B-08 To the Square of the King

… and seven dragons of fire are come with Orcs about them {and Balrogs upon them} down all the ways …
This Balrog must be kept, and must be Gothmog, as he appears in the next paragraph. I have eliminated the dragon-riding.

FG-B-09 The king and his guard
... the royal house laid on and the king came down in splendour among them and hewed with them, that they swept again much of the square, {and of the Balrogs slew even two score,} which was a great prowess indeed:

Mechanical and metal monsters

FG-D-01 Deleting from Maeglin's advice to Morgoth.
{From the greatness of his wealth of metals and his powers of fire he }[He] bid him make {beasts like} snakes and dragons of irresistible might that should overcreep the Encircling Hills and lap that plain and its fair city in flame and death.
Maeglin now advises Morogth to make snakes and dragons (by which should be understood more of the normal kinds of snakes and dragons) but of great strength, as the best means of bringing Gondolin to the ground.

FG-D-02 Devising of the dragons.
Yet these years are filled by Melko in the utmost ferment of labour, and all the thrall-folk of the {Noldoli} [Noldor] must dig unceasingly for metals{ while Melko sitteth and deviseth fires and calleth flames and smokes to come from the lower heats}, nor does {he} [Morgoth] suffer any of the {Noldoli} [Noldor] to stray ever a foot from their places of bondage.
…
Then on a time {Melko} [Morgoth] assembled all his most cunning {smiths and} sorcerers, and {of iron and flame} they wrought a host of monsters such as have only at that time been seen and shall not again be till the Great End. Some {were all of iron so cunningly linked that they} might flow like slow rivers of metal or coil themselves around and above all obstacles before them, and these {were filled in their innermost depths with} [carried on their backs] the grimmest of the Orcs with scimitars and spears; others {of bronze and copper} were given hearts and spirits of blazing fire, and they blasted all that stood before them with the terror of their snorting or trampled whatso escaped the ardour of their breath; yet others were creatures of {pure} flame that writhed like ropes of molten metal, …
The Noldor are now presumably mining metal to arm Morgoth's troops, not to create dragon. The revised acount leaves obscure how these monsters were devised: by breeding or by pods or other method. That they were only seen at that time would mean, in this new context, the time of the end of the First Age, not merely the time of the fall of Gondolin.
I am tempted to keep "of bronze and copper" and modify to "with scales of bronze and copper" here and elsewhere. It would be possible to distinguish iron-scaled and bronze-scaled dragons, but this feels too obviously "clever" to me. The omission of the number of Balrogs is questioned as something that should belong to another thread of change that chances to overlap this thread at this point and should not be considered in this discussion.
It feels a little artificial to me to keep the great mining and work of his thralls, but to entirely change its purpose. Still, it seems only logical that arms would be smithied in preparation for a battle. I think we might consider eliminating the whole passage, but it needs some thought.

FG-D-03 Description of the enemies.
... and go naked into the open against enemies of {steel and} fire, whose trampling shakes the earth ...

FG-D-04
but the stoutest were in dread seeing those dragons of fire and those serpents {of bronze and iron}

FG-D-05 Flexible dragons pressed into service.
But now Gothmog lord of Balrogs, captain of the hosts of {Melko} [Morgoth], took counsel and gathered all his {things of iron} [creatures] that could coil themselves around and above all obstacles before them.
The word "things" doesn't really work at all if "of iron" is removed, as it doesn't seem to refer to the dragons sufficiently. It sounds like the account is talking about some kind of siege devices, like ropes with grapling hooks. Hence I emend to "creatures". Too daring?

FG-D-06 Hollowness of the iron beasts.
Then the engines and the catapults of the king poured darts and boulders and molten metals on those ruthless beasts, and {their hollow bellies clanged} beneath the buffeting, yet it availed not for they might not be broken, and the fires rolled off them. Then {were} the topmost {opened about their middles, and} an innumerable host of the {Orcs} [Orks], the goblins of hatred, poured {therefrom} into the breach;
Minimal change here in the kind of noise that came from the beasts. If felt to be too daring then eliminate "and their hollow bellies clanged beneath the buffeting," entirely.
Some deletions and movement of the word "from" in the last sentence to make it appear the Orks have climbed the stacked beasts as the great-footed dragons will soon do.

FG-D-07 The great-footed dragons prepare to attack Gondolin.
Now then the plan that they made was to hold what they had won, while those serpents {of bronze and }with great feet for trampling climbed slowly over {those of iron} [the others], and reaching the walls there opened a breach wherethrough the Balrogs might {ride upon} [come with] the dragons of flame: yet they knew this must be done with speed, for the heats of those drakes lasted not for ever{, and might only be plenished from the wells of fire that Melko had made in the fastness of his own land}.
I think the replacement of "those of iron" with "the others" is a minimal change. That the fire of the dragons can only be replenished by wells of fire in Angband works for me with the original bronze dragons, but not with live creatures. But the idea that the flame of the dragons dies out after use and must be replenished (now presumably by rest) can be retained.

FG-D-08 Breaking of the Walls.
… one of those {brazen} snakes heaves against …
We need something too connect the bronze serpent here to those previously mentioned. Since the attribute of bronze is gone, I repeat instead "with great feet" from the previous description. Again, the Balrog change belongs to another thread of consideration, hence the queries here.

FG-D-09 Imprisonment of the Noldor.
... they bound and led back and flung {in the iron chambers} amid the dragons{ of iron}, that they might drag them afterward to be thralls of {Melko} [Morgoth].
The prisoners are flung, presumably tied, to be guarded by dragons, not flung into cells within the dragons' bodies.

FG-D-10 At the gate.
Fire-drakes are about it and monsters {of iron} fare in and out of its gates, …

Ambiguous Balrogs

FG-B-01 Balrogs on the dragons of flame.
... and {upon} with them {rode} [came] the Balrogs {in hundreds};
Eliminates reference to Balrogs riding dragons. These Balrogs may or may not be capable of flight. Also, if we change the mechanical dragons to real ones, they may no longer serve as transport.
Possibly adding [as captains]

FG-B-02 Balrogs shoot arrows of fire.
... yet a worse matter was it that {a company} [one] of those demons climbed upon the coils of the serpents of iron and thence loosed unceasingly from {their bows and slings} [his bow] till a fire began to burn in the city to the back of the main army of the defenders.
I have changed the company of Balrogs to a single Balrog. This links to the next item. Removal of words "of iron" are per the modification of the dragons, and should not be considered part of the changes to be considered in this discussion.
I can find nothiing better to do with this passage, unless we decide to cut out Rog's slaying of a Balrog (which we may very well have to do.)

FG-B-03 Rog's men attack
... but the men of Rog leapt even upon the coils of the serpents and came at {those Balrogs} [that Balrog] and smote {them} [him] grievously, for all {they} [he] had {whips} [whip] of Same and claws of steel, and {were} [was] in stature very great. They battered {them} [him] into nought, {or} [and] catching at {their whips} [his whip] wielded {these} [it] against {them} [him], that they tore {them} [him] even as {they} [he] had aforetime torn the Gnomes; and {the number of Balrogs} that [this Balrog] perished was a marvel and dread to the hosts of Melko, for ere that day never had any of the Balrogs been slain by the hand of Elves or Men.
Then Gothmog Lord of Balrogs gathers all his demons [and monsters] that were about the city and ordered them thus: a number made for the folk of the Hammer and gave before them, but the greater company rushing upon the flank contrived to get to their backs, higher upon the coils of the drakes and nearer to the gates, so that Rog might not win back save with great slaughter among his folk.
This leaves the Rog situation as it was; I'll discuss this later. My (risky) addition to the second paragraph, I think, nicely sidesteps the question of Balrog numbers. I wonder if it is justified.

FG-B-04 Rog's slaughter
Fearful too they were for that slaughter Rog had done {amid} [to] the {Balrogs} [Balrog], {because} of those demons they had great courage and confidence of heart.
Now then the plan that they made was to hold what they had won, while those serpents of bronze and with great feet for trampling climbed slowly over {those of iron} [the others], and reaching the walls there opened a breach wherethrough the Balrogs might {ride upon} [come with] the dragons of flame …
I doubt that the first sentence should be deleted, but I can at the moment think of nothing better. At any rate, Rog, whether he kills a Balrog or not, cannot be said to have done slaughter amid them. The change in the second paragraph eliminates Balrogs riding on dragons.

FG-B-05 Entrance into the city
… and behind comes a creature of fire and Balrogs [and monsters] {upon} [with] it.
If we eliminate the dragon-riders altogether, the ‘s' on the end of ‘Balrogs' can stand. My ‘and monsters' is dubious, but follows the trend of this proposed revision. I don't think there's any problem with dropping it, though - there's no reason, even if there were only four Balrogs, that not more than one could have been in the square.

FG-B-06 Ecthelion against the Balrogs
{Of those demons of power Ecthelion slew three} [And he drove them back], for the brightness of his sword cleft the iron of them and did hurt to their fire, and they writhed
This (rather innocuous looking) bit is quite troublesome. My proposal is probably not justified, though I think would work well. Jallanite's proposal is, of course, good; but the mention of ‘three', as innocent as it looks, says things about how many Balrogs there are and aren't.

FG-B-07 The Great Market
… where a force of Orcs {led by Balrogs} came on them at unawares …
We use Jallanite first proposal

FG-B-08 To the Square of the King

… and seven dragons of fire are come with Orcs about them {and Balrogs upon them} down all the ways …
This Balrog must be kept, and must be Gothmog, as he appears in the next paragraph. I have eliminated the dragon-riding.

FG-B-09 The king and his guard
... the royal house laid on and the king came down in splendour among them and hewed with them, that they swept again much of the square, {and of the Balrogs slew even two score,} which was a great prowess indeed:

[ September 22, 2002: Message edited by: antoine2 ]

[ October 11, 2002: Message edited by: lindil ]

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[ February 11, 2003: Message edited by: lindil ]