[Mithadan]

Gravlox led his band into Gol Dulldor ahead of the arrival of the Itship. He was greeted at the gate by a messenger Orc. "Sourone wants to see you," he was told.

Bidding goodbye to his troops, he made his way back to Sourone's office. He knocked at the door, then entered. Sourone was behind his desk reviewing some papers. He looked up as Gravlox entered. "Ah, Gravlox, sit down, sit down," said the Dark Lord.

Gravlox sat on one of the red leatherette chairs and looked expectedly at his master. Sourone removed his wire rim bifocals and rubbed his eyes before he spoke.

"Gravlox," he began. "You've been a valued servant for many years, but recently certain...improprieties have come to my attention."

Gravlox swallowed nervously. "Improprieties?" he asked. "What might those be my Lord?"

Sourone smiled toothily at Gravlox causing the Uruk to shiver. Then he turned and called, "Hazel, come here please." From the shadows near the executive washroom, Gravlox's wife emerged.

"Honey?" cried Gravlox in surprise.

Hazel walked over to stand beside Sourone, who, none too discreetly, patted her anatomy. She giggled, "Sourone!" Then she faced her husband. "Don't you 'Honey' me! For the past two years, you've been home a total of six days. 'Out on missions' you always say. Well, I've talked about you..."

"With who?" asked Gravlox.

Hazel smiled evilly and pointed to his wooden foot. "I was lonely, ouch!" whined the foot as Gravlox kicked the desk. "Every night after you went to sleep, your foot and I would have a little chat," continued Hazel. "Six missions over two years, and your foot says that you didn't raid, pillage or destroy one village. No mayhem, no murder. Instead, you've looked for abandoned settlements and rooted through them for loot. Gravlox how could you!" With an obviously feigned sob, she passed a sheaf of papers to the Uruk.

"What's this?" asked Gravlox as he accepted the documents. She smiled again, causing Gravlox to shudder. "DivOrc papers," she screeched. "You and I are through!"

"Don't I get a trial?" asked Gravlox.

"Ah, yes, a trial," said Sourone as he ran a finger along Hazel's jaw. "The court finds in favor of the plaintiff and enters a judgment of DivOrc. Wait for me in the washroom, dear." With a triumphant cackle, Hazel walked away.

"Now, Gravlox, what shall we do with you?" mused Sourone. At that moment an alarm sounded. A small Orc ran in and shouted, "We're under attack by a band of Elves!" Then the Orc ran out into the halls shouting, "To arms, to arms, the Figwits are coming!"

Sourone stood and looked down at Gravlox. "It seems you will have a chance to redeem yourself. But only one chance," growled the Dark Lord. "Go!" Then Sourone turned and entered the washroom. An odd assortment of sounds came from behind the closed door.

Gravlox stood with a grin. "It could be different," he said. "But it couldn't be better..."

[ February 27, 2003: Message edited by: Mithadan ]