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Old 10-13-2003, 04:15 PM   #80
Birdland
Ghastly Neekerbreeker
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: the banks of the mighty Scioto
Posts: 1,757
Birdland has just left Hobbiton.
Sting

Grrruff the Nazgrrl sat on the bottom step of the Glitzy Caverns, feeling both unimportant and unsatisfied. "Why did I come here? I am not wanted." she thought to herself gloomily. While she sat she played with the Entish Thigh that she had been carrying for what seemed like forever, idly dragging it back and forth up and down the steps while it muttered "Please, I wish you wouldn't do...OW!...now really, you could try to be a bit more careful...ooooph! I'm scratched!"

Grrralph had seemed so happy to see her! And yet, here he was ambling off on that miserable, misshapen equine, Puff. "Why didn't he want to fly? He used to love my flying!" She banged the Thigh hard on the steps, cracking the marble and causing the wood to give a most un-Ent-like squeal. Grrruff seriously considered eating Puff whenever Grrralph returned from whatever mysterious errand he was on, but knew that pony would just go straight to her hips.

"As if HE'D even notice." she sighed again. As if things were not bad enough, Chrysophylax was still directing his attention in every direction except her own. At this moment he had snaked his head through the casino door and was studiously watching a pair of Halfling croupiers happily fleece a down-on-his-luck Half-Elven at endless games of "Eleventy-One".

"What'swrong with me?" she whimpered to herself, wringing the sentient log in her claws. Green tears threatened to splash from her slitted eyes, which the Entish Thigh knew would leave a ring on his highly polished grain. He desperately tried to think of some way to stem the sticky flow.

"Perhaps you need to take a different approach with that one, young...uh...beastress?" he stammered.

"Coooooo?" Grrruff whimpered

"Well, find out what his interests are. What does he do for a living? Why does he hang out with a Dwarf? Does he like music? Why not write him a nice note telling him how glad you are to be sharing this adventure." - "And you might also ask why this motley collection of half-wits chose to remove me from The Goldlamé Hall in the first place" the log muttered under its breath.

Grrruff stared blankly at the Thigh for a moment, as if it suggested she take up rose gardening. Then, dropping the lumber, she bounded down the steps to the luggage still bundled on the Gallowship's cart. Flinging clothes, toiletries, and magic jewelry carelessly about, she dug through the backpacks until she found a piece of parchment, quill and ink. Then clambering back up the stairs, she laid these down in front of the Entish Thigh and impatiently tapped him with her claw, leaving a gouge.

"What, you want me to write the letter? But my dear young beastress, I have no hands". Grrruff immediately whirled and dashed off down the steps again.

Just as the Ent-part was congratulating himself on getting out of what he was sure would have been an uncomfortable and distasteful assignment, Grrruff came galumphing back with one of the Halfling croupiers clutched in her teeth. She dropped him on the steps and pinned him there with a talon, while gazing at the Log with pleading eyes.

The Entish Thigh heaved a martyred sigh. "You may as well give up struggling and pick up the quill, old chap," he said to the struggling hobbit, who was futilely swinging his fists at the towering fell beast. "You and I are about to compose a billet-doux".

[ October 13, 2003: Message edited by: Birdland ]
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