[littlemanpoet]

"Right you are, my deary," Eodwine said to Gudryn. "Mayhap the pair have been having nightmares from Mordor and have kept their quiet withal. But let's continue their tale and let the simmering kettles at this table begin to cool.

"'Sherbet?' said Gob, scratching his wax filled ears. 'Maybe you're cool as a cucumber but you don't look like sherbet to me.'

"'Shirriff,' Falco stated more clearly this time. 'That's what the feather stands for. I watches the borders, minds the roads, and delivers the post, though you ruffians don't make it no easier to do that last part.' Falco raised himself as high into Gob's face as he could, being two foot shorter at the least.

"'Now Mister Shirriff,' said Twiddle, 'we ain't no ruffians. We was jus' mindin' our business away over by Bree when we got up and pressed into this hyar gang of Ruffins-'

"'That's ruffians', Gob assisted.

"'-gang of Ruffins,' Twiddle insisted, 'and als we want is to be let go back agin.'

"'And in the meantime,' Gob said with a wry grin, 'we're cookin' up sherbet.'

"Falco saw that these two just didn't cut it as ruffians, or ruffins; more like muffins they were, or at least the one of 'em, while the other was more like a bean with ears and wizard's hat. So he tilted his head to one side and asked them a question, since his quick mind was catching at least as much as they were saying.

"'Tell me about this sherbet a bit.'

"Just then another of the ruffian ilk came up and got all threatening to Gob and Twiddle for standing on their shovels, and got intimidating - that is, over-towering and bullying - to Falco, who just stared up at the mean old bloke, 'cause Falco can't be cowed, plain and simple. I should know.

"'I'm about my duty,' he said to the bully, 'and neither you nor any of your bothersome cronies will make me shirk! So be off with you and go about your stealin'!'

"'That's gathering, you little nannyhammer, and don't let me hear you say nothin' more about stealin'.'

"'Gathering, stealing, call it what you like, it ain't right and you know it, and nor I nor none of us wants you here. The sooner you and yours go back to wherever you call home (as if you had mothers!), the better we'll like it.'

"The bully frowned blackly at Falco and judged that alone he was not going to win a battle of words with the insolent little snip, so he turned to Gob and Twiddle.

"'Get back to work or you'll hear it from Ferny! No, make that Sharkey!'

"'Yessir, we'll work right hard, sir,' said Gob, still leaning on his shovel.

"'No doubt about it, sir, we'll work as hard as ever you did see, yessiree,' said Twiddle, still leaning on his shovel.

"'That's more like it,' said the bully and fool, and walked away, leaving Falco snickering under his breath as Gob and Twiddle continued leaning on their shovels."

"And now," said Eodwine, I've talked more than even Falco has a mind to, and I need to take a drink break. More mead please! Who will pick up the tale next?"