[Raynor]

Originally Posted by davem

Fine - but most of us are not in that position, & we are the very ones Tolkien's work speaks to. We are not monks or nuns, we are ordinary 'Hobbits' & death is not a 'culmination' of our strivings.

I am not sure what you recommend to those who are theists; that they should demonise death?

Originally Posted by davem

But this is effectively treating life, not death, with contempt - as a means to an end. That is not 'accepting death' at all, it is denying it its right & proper 'respect'.

It depends; from a theological point of view, if that sacrifice was done selflessly, having a spiritual good in sight, if the cause itself is compatible with religious percepts, then it is not condemnable. "And he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it" Matthew 10.39. Various monks in Vietnam burned themselves to death to protest oppression in their country. Selfless sacrifice for the sake of others is the hallmark of great spirits everywhere, be they Christ, Gandhi, or Bahaullah.

Originally Posted by davem

Then why are the deaths I mentioned seen (& more importantly felt) as tragedies? Tolkien never implies that those who felt grief at the passing of those individuals were delusional, or 'sinful' (which would be the case if they were merely believing Melkor's lies). Those deaths are presented & perceived as wrong - & more importantly so is Aragorn's by Arwen - & she knows the theory - 'Death is the Gift of Eru to Men' 'Its only a transition' etc, etc. Yet when it comes to it she also knows it is not 'good', pleasant or right - its the opposite in fact.

Of the elves, it is said in the Atrabeth:

By the holiness of good men - their direct attachment to Eru, before and above all Eru's works - the Elves may be delivered from the last of their griefs: sadness; the sadness that must come even from the unselfish love of anything less than Eru.)

I would dare say even for Men attachment to anything other than Eru will produce sadness - and grief and loss. As in wordly religions, suffering comes from a wrong attitude - this time, the cause being the object of attachment. Perhaps a certain amount of such an error is pardonable, or even ok; but it would stop being so, when the grief becomes a cause to turn against the Creator.

Originally Posted by davem

And the evidence for that trust? Eru does not one single thing to justify it.

I think I have previously presented various instances in which Eru is an active participant in Ea, albeit not a completely direct actor. His actions prove his love of the Eruhini. Besides them, Tolkien speculates in the Letters that Aragorn in his reign would reinstitute the belief in Eru and his worship (although no temples...)
Edit:
a belief that would provide ways to reconnect - and I believe that it will have beneficial effects on those who will follow it (at least the contrary is true, those who fall further into evil have their lives shortened by various cute means). The belief "system" itself, and the effects I presume it has, are further "proofs". Of course, one has to be open to them.