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Old 01-10-2011, 10:54 AM   #55
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Join Date: Jan 2011
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Ekimeniso has just left Hobbiton.
I agree on all points

Originally Posted by Findegil View Post
RB-DF-04b:I marked that as well. But your mixed sentence is in my veiw also overloaded with metaphorical images. Probably Aiwendil is right and in the ende we have to choose one or the other image here.

I don't think we had the suggestion to put in the lamentation in Gondolin at the point Fingolfin is buried before. I like your suggestion to add it even before the building of the cairn. But I would leave Turgons action as in subordinate clause and hold then 'him'. Also we might chnage Gondolin in one place, becuase other wise we get a bad style by our emendation. Either we use 'Tumladen' in the first place or 'in the City' in the second. I prefer 'Tumladen' in the first, because 'in the city' would only move the problem to a double 'city':RB-DF-09:
I did not consider to take up the full sentence when I suggested the addition (don't ask me why), but I see that it will work better with that clause:Respectfuly
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