Taters to Taters

[the phantom]

Bombadil is crazy: "The world is going to crap around me, la la la. No one knows who or what I am, hey dilly. I treat the Ring like it's a trinket, ding dillo. And I could really help on this adventure, but I'm staying here to... dance and stuff."

Denethor is crazy: "We're screwed! I'm just going to kill myself. Oh, and my son too. Duty to kingdom? Ha! I like fire better."

Thorin is crazy: "I'm going to reclaim my kingdom with the help of twelve dwarves and a hobbit. There's a dragon there, but, uh, something will... happen, I think. Anyway, we can steal from him. If he doesn't kill us. And if we can get in. And then I'll lock myself in the mountain."

Gollum is crazy: "I like my master. No, I don't, he's tricksy. But we want to destroy the Dark Lord, but no- I don't want to, because the Ring is my precious. But I hate it. Etc. etc."

All legit crazy I'd say...