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Old 06-09-2007, 05:47 PM   #11
The Saucepan Man
Corpus Cacophonous
 
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: A green and pleasant land
Posts: 8,390
The Saucepan Man has been trapped in the Barrow!
White-Hand The road map for Thinlómien’s lynching

As the Days had grown quieter, the remaining delegates had finally got round to constructing some gallows. The delegate of INSTRAW was to be the first to test them out.

“Honorable chair, fellow delegates,” said Thinlómien, as she stood to read her closing address. “Acknowledging the votes cast toDay and fully respecting the outcome of the established voting process, I would like to move on behalf of INSTRAW that the delegates present should establish a road map within which the conditions might be met for the ultimate placement of my head in the noose, while at the same time steps be taken towards drawing up a mutually acceptable document within which criteria may be laid down for the activation of the lever, whereby the trapdoor beneath my feet might then be released, thereby propelling my body in a sharp downwards motion and so bringing about the anticipated scenario within which my neck might be broken, thus ending my life and thereby fulfilling the democratically expressed will of the assembly.”

“Motion passed,” replied the delegates, as they immediately set to work.

“Um, I would like to put forward a statement on behalf of INSTRAW expressing my complete and overwhelming surprise that the criteria and conditions laid down in my closing address have been met with such undue and unusual rapidity,” declared Thinlómien as she stood on the gallows with her head in the noose. “In my long experience as a committee representative, it is rare for such … Urrrrghh!”

The criteria had been met and the conditions fulfilled whereby Thinlómien’s life could be brought to an abrupt conclusion. Her body, however, remained unchanged.

The dead:

The Saucepan Man - Slaughtered and boiled up in a spicy ghoulash on Night zero.
xyzzy - Got bored of the role-based banter and hung himself quietly on Day 1 (Ordinary Innocent)
Meneltarmacil - Fatally wounded in sooth he was and crawled awaye to find ye deathe in ye woodes on Nighte 1 (Werewolfe)
Rune Son of Bjarne - Hunted and added to his own trophy collection on Night 1 (Ordinary Innocent)
Durelin - Spied on things which should not be seen and got hung for it on Night 1 (Thief)
Kath - Burned at the stake and spurned by her Lord on Day 2 (Priestess of Sauron)
Rikae - Tickled mercilessly and died with a smile on her face on Night 2 (Oridnary Innocent)
Legate of Amon Lanc - Underwent radical optical surgery and lost his life and his foresight on Night 2 (Druid)
Isabellkya - Mometarily caught off guard by a darting fox and set upon by the angry mob on Day 3 (Werewolf)
Shastanis Althreduin - Had the life squeezed from his Half human, half equine form on Night 3 (Oridnary Innocent)
the guy who be short - Consumed and reduced to nothing but bare bones on Night 3 (Ordinary Innocent)
Feanor of the Peredhil - Brutally attacked yet lived long enough to write her bloody epitaph on Night 3 (Ordinary Innocent).
Mithalwen - Went down fighting in a dubious pastiche of British classic comedy and was summarily dismembered by a unanimous motion of the general assembly on Day 4 (Werewolf).
Aganzir - Battered, bruised and bloodied and left to die on Night 4 (Werewolf)
Thinlómien - Fulfilled the criteria and met the conditions whereby she could be hung until she be dead on Day 5 (Ordinary Innocent)

The living:

Mormegil
Gil-Galad
Volo - the very hairy delegate from as far as it gets
Nogrod - the moody delegate from the Witch-burners' village who is ready and willing to form a theory to suit his feelings whatever the facts ...
Boromir88 - the filibuster delegate from Laketown, whose geography is not that good
The Sixth Wizard

Day 5 is over. Night 5 has begun. Let the Nightly deeds commence.
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