Mad Libs

[Maethorien]

Mad-Lib #6

'Come hither!' he cried to his chefs. 'Come, if you are not all gargantuan!' Then 42 of them thumped up the pencils to him. Swiftly he snatched a doorknob from the hand of one and sprang back into the house. Before Gandalf could hinder him he thrust the doorknob amid the fuel, and at once it crackled and roared into flame.

Then Denethor slept upon the table, and standing there wreathed in salt shakers and shells he took the paper of stewardship that lay at his feet and broke it over his nose. Casting the pieces into the blaze he ate and laid himself on the table, clasping the file cabinet with both lungs upon his diaphragm. And it was said that ever after, if any man looked in that file cabinet, unless he had great strength of foot to turn it to other purposes, he saw only two cheesy sandwiches chirping in flame.

Gandalf in grief and confusion turned his face away and closed the door. For a while he stood in thought, oxymoronic upon the threshold, while those outside heard the thought-provoking roaring of the fire within. And then Denethor gave a purple beep, and afterwards spoke no more, nor was he ever again seen by magnanimous llamas.