Middle-earth Therapy Sessions

[Sadbh]

C: (me) Okay *flips pages on clipboard until* ringwraith number... 6?

*Ringwraith number six slumps in and wisks over to a seat far awy from the table. He hunches menacingly*

Ringwraith 6: menacing *hissssssssssssss*

C: Oh, throat lozenge?

*Ringwraith Furtively snatches one.*

Ringwraith: Lord, thanks. Haven't been able to talk right since the Witch King had to go ham it up in the movies. Now everybody is dissapointed when I talk like this. They say 'Why don't you talk that funny way. You're not very menacing.' Blithering little-

C:It sounds to me that you have hostility problems toward your leader, Mr. Six, and that you're tired of expectations the world has-

Ringwraith 6: But, but I don't want to Number Six. *starts jumping up and down, and throwing a tantrum* I WANT A NAME!

C: Erm, what name would ou like then?

*Jeapordy music plays in the backround as Ringwraith six picks out a name*

C: Is that Jeapordy music?

Ringwraith 6: I believe it is.

C: Anyway, 'you picked a name out?

Ringwraith 6: Indeed, my name is now, Herbert.

C: *incredulously* Herbert?


Herbert:*looking 'cheerful'* Or Herby.


C: Alright then, back to the, er session.

Herbert/Herby: *deep, terrifying sigh* I can't even think of where to begin with my problems. I hate the head of my branch, that'd be The Witch King, not the boss himself, I'm having trouble concentrating at work. Sometimes I feel I could be doing something so much better, like working for deprived Haradrim kids. But at night I obsess about my job, I obsess about that one ring to rule them all.

C: *is slumped on desk, eyes glazed* Huh! Oh, oh, oh I see. What do you think the root of the problems migh-

*Herbert/Herby has already begun*

Herbert/Herby: I think it began on one sunny day of my youth, when my brother who was not destined to become a great king of men shoved me off the tire swing-

*a buzzer rings*

C: Oh! Time's up! Thank Eru! Go now, go go, GO!

*She shoos him out the door and desolves in a fit of hysterical giggles.*


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Hmm, yes it was pathetic. Oh, well.

[ January 02, 2003: Message edited by: Sadbh ]