I smell cheeze.

[Boromir88]

I'm surprised no one has said this one yet.

I see you!

With all the slamming of Legolas this one liner by the Witch-king might just be as bad. When he's standing over Theoden...

Die Now!

Reminds me of that corny movie Dark City where these vampirish looking people go around wave their hand and say "sleep," and the people pass out.

Of course I can't let Legolas go without getting another jab at him. When he's doing his Mumak slaying bonanza and counting kills, "34, 35, 36..etc." This is only bad because the fangurls in the theatre began counting with him, and when he was done counting they continued to count his kills....ugh.

Aragorn in TTT:

You have 2000 good men riding North as we speak. Eomer is loyal to you, he will return and fight for his king.

What I find corny about this is when Eomer and Aragorn met in the plains of Rohan (Movie) there were probably barely 100 riders, so somehow the Rohirrim must have some sort of cloning machine off star wars, and on top of the that Aragorn just knows they are up to 2000. Heck the Elves have Scotty's transporter beam, now the Rohirrim are making their own advances in technology.

Essex, I applaud you for defending the movies, however I didn't make this thread intending to downgrade PJ's movies, they were great movies. This is intended just for some cheezy lines, and sometimes cheezy is funny, heck I tell old corny jokes all the time .

[Elven-Maiden]

These are cheesy, but I love them to bits!

Aragorn: Gentlemen, we do not stop till nightfall.
Pippin: What about breakfast?
Aragorn: You've already had it.
Pippin: We've had one, yes. What about second breakfast?
Merry: I don't think he knows about second breakfast, Pip.
Pippin: What about elevenses? Luncheon? Afternoon tea? Dinner? Supper? He knows about them, doesn't he?
Merry: I wouldn't count on it.


Gimli: Not the beard.


Frodo: I am Frodo Baggins, and this is Samwise Gamgee.
Faramir: Your bodyguard?
Sam: His gardener.


Legolas: (in Elvish) You're late.
Legolas: (in English)You look terrible.

Smeagol: ...and take it for ME.
Gollum: For us.
Smeagol: I meant for us

[Essex]

Boromir,

regarding your point on the cheesiness of 'Die Now' that the Witch King says to Eowyn.

This line was borrowed from the Witch King's line to Gandalf at the gates of Minas Tirith.

'Old fool!' he said. 'Old fool! This is my hour. Do you not know Death when you see it? Die now and curse in vain!'

So PJ cannot be blamed for that.

Therefore Tolkien has Cheesy Dialouge too..........

[Boromir88]

Then why doesn't he just say...

Do you not know Death when you see it? Die now and curse in vain!'

Instead of cutting the sentence in half with a cheezy Legolas liner "Die now." I don't see Tolkien as the cheeziness here because he just didn't end it with "Die Now!" Just doesn't sound right, reminds me of "Sleep (hand wave)." Which was just downright bad.

Edit: I'm sure if I look hard enough I can find corny lines Tolkien has too, in fact I know one.
"Shortcuts make for delays, but inns make for longer ones."
This I find really corny, but that good corny, sort of like your Grandpa's jokes, with that quirky sort of humor. Where "Die Now!," or "A Diversion!," or "I see you!" are just...bad.

[Essex]

OK Boromir, I understand your point that maybe the line is 'bad' because it cuts out most of the sentence, but I don't see how it's 'cheesy'.

anyway, I enjoyed the Witch King scene immensly, it was one of the scenes I was most looking forward to, and it didn't dissapoint.

And I didn't smell gorgonzola either....

[mark12_30]

There are few lines that I mind; "A diversion" is one, I suppose. Much that has been mentioned so far I am either little bothered by or I enjoy. However, what I do find very cheesy indeed is: the LACK of good lines for Frodolijah.

Book-Frodo is learned, articulate, thoughtful, diplomatic, and a worthy nephew of Ambassador Bilbo. His extensive discussion with Faramir, for instance, is astonishingly eloquent, and in my opinion it's a shame that we never heard any of it in the movie.

Wood is no slouch, and can deliver a line, a paragraph, or a speech at need. I wish they'd asked him to once in a while. Instead, Frodolijah was relegated to body-language, eye-rolling, falling, and slithering into corners far too often.

[Lalwendë]

Aragorn's "Dwelling in the days of peace" speech at his coronation.

I have a video tape somewhere with an episode of The South Bank Show about Ian McKellen; on this there's a most amusing out-take where they do a 'spoof' coronation. In this, Ian McKellen is crowned and he delivers the immortally camp line "these are the days of the Queen..."

Now, to be fair on the lines which Orlando Bloom got, I think they weren't all that bad, but you could tell he was straight-out-of-drama-school in many cases; his enunciation was just too perfect, which made some of his lines sound twee.

My worst line has to be the much hated: "Give up the halfling, she-elf".

[Sapphire_Flame]

Originally Posted by Lalwendë

My worst line has to be the much hated: "Give up the halfling, she-elf".

Gneh. Ditto that. Good point about "just out of acting school" Orli, too.

~ Saphy ~

[Essex]

Originally Posted by mark12_30

However, what I do find very cheesy indeed is: the LACK of good lines for Frodolijah........Wood is no slouch, and can deliver a line, a paragraph, or a speech at need. I wish they'd asked him to once in a while. Instead, Frodolijah was relegated to body-language, eye-rolling, falling, and slithering into corners far too often.

So what about his narration back at Bag End? That was beautifully delivered and gets me every time I hear it.

Does anyone here except for me and the Saucepan Man actually like these movies? All I seem to see on these movie posts is another reason to slag them off.......

(yes, I know, taking myself far too seriously)

[mark12_30]

Originally Posted by Essex

So what about his narration back at Bag End? That was beautifully delivered and gets me every time I hear it.

Does anyone here except for me and the Saucepan Man actually like these movies?

I love these movies. As I've said elsewhere, they are some of the best Tolkien fanfiction ever produced, and have rekindled interest in many, and introduced Tolkien to many who would not otherwise have landed in Middle-Earth at all. They do deviate from the books, etc etc, but given their positive worldwide Tolkien impact I can 'forgive' much. I think they are mostly superb as they stand, and deserved all eleven oscars, etc.

And yes, the narration at Bag End is wonderful-- to me, proof that more of Frodo should have been heard as well as seen. That is my one real complaint about the movies as a whole: that Frodo was dumbed down.

Otherwise, they are magnificent.

[THE Ka]

Originally Posted by Boromir88

I'm surprised no one has said this one yet.


With all the slamming of Legolas this one liner by the Witch-king might just be as bad. When he's standing over Theoden...

Reminds me of that corny movie Dark City where these vampirish looking people go around wave their hand and say "sleep," and the people pass out.

Of course I can't let Legolas go without getting another jab at him. When he's doing his Mumak slaying bonanza and counting kills, "34, 35, 36..etc." This is only bad because the fangurls in the theatre began counting with him, and when he was done counting they continued to count his kills....ugh.

Aragorn in TTT:

What I find corny about this is when Eomer and Aragorn met in the plains of Rohan (Movie) there were probably barely 100 riders, so somehow the Rohirrim must have some sort of cloning machine off star wars, and on top of the that Aragorn just knows they are up to 2000. Heck the Elves have Scotty's transporter beam, now the Rohirrim are making their own advances in technology.

Essex, I applaud you for defending the movies, however I didn't make this thread intending to downgrade PJ's movies, they were great movies. This is intended just for some cheezy lines, and sometimes cheezy is funny, heck I tell old corny jokes all the time .

heh! Dark City! I love that movie! Cracks me up. But, it made my brother terrified. So, my friend once waited until he had left his room (he had been playing pong or mario for 10 hours without a bathroom break...) she hid in the darkness of his room and then jumped out and said "SLEEP!". My brother screamed (in his normal 5-year-old girl style...) and fell on the floor. It was funny until we thought he really "fainted" but, he was trying to trick us into thinking he did. oh, well. it was fun anyway.

Ok, time for cheezy scene...

When you first see frodo after the Arwen river-incident and his little bout with the Nazguls... It makes me laugh so much when they throw in that fakey looking "head towards the light" bit and you only see Elrond's talking head...

So funny.

~Pinotastic Ka~

[Oddwen]

Sam in Moria (the new Captain Obvious?)

Not new at all...Sam is the original. Leggy is just the copycat. If you will recall in TTT at the Black Gate, Sam leans too far out and "surfs" down the hill. This is far before Helm's Deep and Legolas's shield surfing move. (The only difference between the two is that Sam had a bad landing...)

It's like my Dad said. "They made Gollum too weak." Both of his monologues are very offensive to me. Especially the last:

"And they doesn't taste very nice, does they precious?
No. Not nice at all.........my love."

And especially...
"She always needs. To feed."
Yuck. Makes Shelob sound like some b-movie vampire...probably like this "Dark City" y'alls is talking about.

[The Saucepan Man]

By the time we get to 10 pages, we should have the entire script here ...

[Boromir88]

lol SpM, come on now, I like....that one line....you know....the one I'm talking about.... .

I think Denethor's running out of the hall and getting a 10.0 off his dive was rather corny, for this reason. I'm sorry Denny, that's what you get when you put flamable liquids on yourself and get too close to fire, what did you expect?

[mark12_30]

And they doesn't taste very nice, does they precious?

That one makes me laugh anytime, anywhere. I **love** it.

[Oddwen]

That line isn't so bad. It's the reply.

By the time we get to 10 pages, we should have the entire script here ...

~SPM

Oh yes! That's what I forgot!