If I found 200,000 orcs on my front door, I would.... - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

the guy who be short · 05-22-2005, 06:50 AM

I've just realised that my siege idea wouldn't work. Orcs wouldn't run out of stores - they'd just eat one another.
I guess I could try and withstand the siege and wait until the majority of the army has been consumed, then make a break for it...

Orc pie, anyone?

Glirdan · 05-23-2005, 12:15 PM

Guy who be short, would you happen to have any more room in that card game you were planning? It's better than my idea anyway. What kind of person would want to try and jump out a window that doesn't exisist? Oh, right, that would be me............

the guy who be short · 05-23-2005, 01:46 PM

Let us look at the wording of the question once more.

If I found 200,000 orcs on my front door, I would....

This is a happy scenario: the orcs only appear at one person's house, not all. Therefore, whilst one of us is beseiged and slowly goes insane through loneliness, the others can continue living their merry lives. Unfortunately, this means no communal card games.

However, if I am besieged, I extend offers to all of you to dig your way in for a game of cards.

A thought: If the Orcs were on the front door... surely they'd be tiny little ants swarming over it? In which case, a can of bug spray and problem solved.

EDIT:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lyta_Underhill

laugh and point and wonder how they got so small they could fit on my front door! Then I'd cover the door with a thick coat of barn red paint to make it match the roof! Bye bye 200,000 tiny orcs!

Ah, apparently it wasn't my idea. Oh well.

Larien Telemnar · 05-25-2005, 07:48 PM

Run around screaming and calling for help.

Or perhaps I would grab my frying pan and start knocking them around, then slip out among the confusion because of how short I am, they'd think one of their own had attacked some of them, they'd kill each other off, problem solved.

Or I would baracade the door................ Yeah, THAT'D do a whole honkin' lot of good! *Snort* Let's here it for the mouse Hobbit!

05-23-2005, 12:15 PM	#2
Glirdan Energetic Essence Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Where Lark Nor Eagle Ever Flew Posts: 3,285	Guy who be short, would you happen to have any more room in that card game you were planning? It's better than my idea anyway. What kind of person would want to try and jump out a window that doesn't exisist? Oh, right, that would be me............ __________________ *I'm going to buy you a kitty, I'm going to let you fall in love with the kitty, and one cold, winter night, I'm going to steal into your house and punch you in the face!* Fenris Wolf

05-25-2005, 07:48 PM	#4
Larien Telemnar Wight Join Date: May 2005 Location: Frogmorton, The Shire, Middle-Earth Posts: 110	If I found 200,000 orcs on my front door, I would.... Run around screaming and calling for help. Or perhaps I would grab my frying pan and start knocking them around, then slip out among the confusion because of how short I am, they'd think one of their own had attacked some of them, they'd kill each other off, problem solved. Or I would baracade the door................ Yeah, THAT'D do a whole honkin' lot of good! Snort Let's here it for the mouse Hobbit! __________________ Oh look! It's a Blog!! What's it do? Pushes button Hammer zings out SPLAT! Flat Hobbit Oh! So that's what it does! Moan

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05-22-2005, 06:50 AM	#1
the guy who be short Shadowed Prince Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Thulcandra Posts: 2,343	I've just realised that my siege idea wouldn't work. Orcs wouldn't run out of stores - they'd just eat one another. I guess I could try and withstand the siege and wait until the majority of the army has been consumed, then make a break for it... Orc pie, anyone?