Barrow Confessional

[Fordim Hedgethistle]

Name: Fordim Hedgethistle. Other known aliases: Fordie, Fordhim, Professor Hedgehthistle, That Guy Who Starts All the Polls.

Quest: To live a meaningful, happy life and then die well.

Favourite colour: The green of a living, healthy forest.

Most beloved Tolkien character: Aragorn.

Least beloved Tolkien character: Thranduil (what a jerk; making war on the Dwarves and Men of Dale for dragon's gold -- an Elf should know better).

Worst habit: Lying.

Best habit: Daily walk in the woods with my son.

Unlikeliest celebrity crush: It's a tie:

Johnny Depp -- the man is more beautiful than anyone has a right to be.

Vin Diesel -- the man is cooller than anyone has a right to be.

Weirdest hobby: The Downs.

Best place in Middle Earth: Bag-End.

Best place outside of Middle Earth: The Caribbean.

Most embarrassing moment: The very first time I called a girl I liked to ask her to a movie.

Most daring moment: The very first time I called a girl I liked to ask her to a movie.

Favourite "LotR" actor: Sir Ian McKellan: his Macbeth is legendary, his Iago is epic, his Richard III is breath-taking.

Least favourite "LotR" actor: Brad Dourif...I mean, really, other than the creepy voice and the weird eyes, does this guy have anything going for him?

Theme song: "Like a Rolling Stone"...Dylan, Baby!

Style guru: Indianna Jones.

Most crucial accessory: My book satchel.

Greatest weakness: Pretty girls.

Greatest strength: My ability to think outside the box. That, and my modesty.

Favourite place to visit on the Downs: The Green Dragon Inn.

Best Downer Buddy: Aman and Bethberry.

Parting shot: If you want anymore, you can sing it yourself, Uh-huh.