The Narn i Chîn Húrin: Beleg & Falivirn

[Findegil]

Posted by Aiwendil:

As far as I can tell, that leaves us only with a few lines that need to be fixed for reasons of alliteration in this section.

Agreed. A list of the lines not fitting would be nice. But I am to tired to night to produce one.

While rereading the Lay in search for some add-able material for the fight on the summit of Amon Rudh (nothing useable was found; the Sil77 seems to be in part a paraphrasing of the Lay) I found a piece that would fit earlier in the narative:

... NA-EX-37 <Ap Narn Túrin received gladly all who came to him, but by the counsel of Beleg he admitted no newcomer to his refuge upon Amon Rûdh (and that was now named Echad i Sedryn, Camp of the Faithful); the way thither only those of the Old Company knew and no others were admitted. But other guarded camps and forts were established round about: in the forest eastward, or in the highlands, or in the southward fens, from Methed-en-glad ("the End of the Wood") to Bar-erib some leagues south of Amon Rûdh; and from all these places men could see the summit of Amon Rûdh, and by signals receive tidings and commands.> NA-EX-37.2 <editorial bridge And the Lay tells about that time:
><Lay Thus war was waked in the woods once more
for the foes of Faërie, and its fame widely,
and the fear of that fellowship, now fared abroad; {645}
when the horn was heard of the hunting Elves
that shook the shaws and the sheer valleys. 5
Blades were naked and bows twanging,
and shafts from the shadows shooting wingéd,
and the sons of darkness slain and conquered; {650}
even in Angband the Orcs trembled.
Then the word wandered down the ways of the forest 10
that Túrin Thalion was returned to war{;
and Thingol heard it, and his thanes were sped
to lead the lost one in love to his halls - 655
but his fate was fashioned that they found him not}.
Little gold they got in that grim warfare,
but weary watches and wounds for guerdon;
nor on robber-raids now rode they ever,
who fended from NA-EX-37.5{Faërie}[friends] the fiends of Hell. {660}15
>
NA-EX-38 <Ap Narn {It is several times emphasized that }Beleg remained throughout opposed to Túrin's grand design, ...

I think we should add it. It does only add little to the narative but it prepares the read for what is to come.

Respectfully
Findegil

[Aiwendil]

By my reckoning, the problems for which he currently have no solution are:

FG-RG-26
FG-RG-27
FG-RG-67
FG-RG-73

Note - I had failed to comment before but your proposed:

NA-RG-73 and {Flinding}[Guilin’s son] knew it {at the feet} before the throne of the king

. . . lacks alliteration.

Other than those four, we seem to have solutions that are at least satisfactory - though it certainly wouldn't hurt to continue to look at some of them and seek improvement.

NA-EX-37.2: I like the idea of including this, but I hesitate about the lines:

Then the word wandered down the ways of the forest 10
that Túrin Thalion was returned to war

Turin's identity is known to his comrades at this point, but is it known generally that Gorthol is the heir of Hador?

[Findegil]

NA-EX-37.2: Posted by Aiwendil:

Turin's identity is known to his comrades at this point, but is it known generally that Gorthol is the heir of Hador?

Well, he does wear the Helm which will hint at his identity. In addition we would be able to argue that "down the ways of the forest" could mean that this was discussed in the Forest of Doriath were anybody did know who was the wearer of the Dragon-Helm.

NA-RG-73: Mhm, it must have been late when I proposed that. You are right that it does not alliterate at all.

NA-RG-67:What about:

Then NA-RG-67{Flinding go-Fuilin }[Gwindor] freely answered Guilin's son:

Respectfully
Findegil

[Aiwendil]

NA-EX-37.2: I suppose you're right.

NA-RG-67: I think your proposal has one too many strong syllables. Perhaps just:

Then NA-RG-67{Flinding go-Fuilin }[Gwindor] {freely} answered[,] Guilin's son:

[Findegil]

Just an idea for NA-RG-27:

So {fearful}worried his {face}visage that NA-RG-27{Flinding}[Gwindor] crouched

The alliteration is not perfect, but it might be better then nothing.

Respectfuly
Findegil

[Aiwendil]

Hmm . . . I'm afraid I don't think that can work.

Also, I think that "fearful" here is probably objective rather than subjective - i.e. "inspiring fear" rather than "indicating fear". So I don't think that "worried" works.

I will make a concerted effort to study the difficult lines tomorrow.

[Aiwendil]

Well, I'm afraid I haven't made much progress. But one possibility that occurs to me for FG-RG-26 is:

amid foes imagined; but NA-RG-26{Fuilin's son} [fearful Gwindor] {1265}