Middle Earth Idol

[Morai]

"That was so terribly wrong and appalling. I'm sorry, dear, its a no from me."

Now that's the Sleepy--I mean Cowell--ah, whatever. I'll be in the vehicle-a-jig, prepping for my next act. (looks down) Hey, who jacked my yellow boots?

[Caranlondien]

Enter Movie-Elrond

Movie-Elrond: Hello, Mr Anderson... I mean, Mr... Whatever your names are... My name is Movie-Elrond, and I'll be performing a song I wrote for my daughter, Movie-Arwen. It's called "She's Come Undone", by the Guess Who. Although I like the Zombies version, personally. Anyway, here goes...

Begins singing, in, of course, Hugo Weaving's voice

She's come undone
We didn't know what she was headed for
And when we found what she was headed for
It was too late

She's come undone
She has a line-count that is far too high
I think that there's a scene in which she flies
It is too late!

It's too late
She's gone too far
She saw "her son"
She's come undone
What ever happend to that Glorfindel guy?
And those water-horses were totally mine.
That was so lame!

She's come undone
We didn't know what she was headed for
And when we found what she was headed for
Nana, it was too late!

Too many scenes, and not enough off-screen time,
Too much drama, about sailing to the Undying Lands,
Too many powers, I mean since when can she do magic?
Too many lines; Did she even talk in the book?

It's too late
She's gone too far
She's replaced the sun.
She's come undone!

[Sleepy Ranger]

Caranlondien (Movie-Elrond)

I am stunned... that performance was quite good. You were a bit shaky in the start and your voice was high-pitched but I'd say towards the middle you got better and went through till the end but the start was just horrible. I can see you've got no signs of nervousness but frankly, it was good but I don't think it was good enough. I'm sorry its a no.

[wilwarin538]

Caranlondien
I think that was a good and creative performance. You did a great job with that, and I think you could do fairly well in this compitition. I say yes.

[Glirdan]

Caranlondien (Movie-Elrond)

Firstly, I'd like to say this: Cowell, you are an oxymoron. Next, Elrond, you rocked that performance! It's a major yes from me!

[Celuien]

Hello. I'm Panakeia, and I'm going to sing a little Schubert for you. This is his most famous song, "Der Erlkönig." The words are from a poem about the King of the Elves as known (or not) in Harad.

Wer reitet so spät durch Nacht und Wind?
Es ist der Vater mit seinem Kind;
Er hat den Knaben wohl in dem Arm,
Er faßt ihn sicher, er hält ihn warm.
(Who rides so late, through night and wind?
It is the father, with his child;
He has the young lad clasped in his arms,
He holds him securely, he holds him warm)

"Mein Sohn, was birgst du so bang dein Gesicht?"
"Siehst, Vater, du den Erlkönig nicht?
Den Erlkönig mit Kron und Schweif?"
"Mein Sohn, es ist ein Nebelstreif."'
("My son, why do you hide your face?"
"Father, don't you see the Elf King?
The Elf King, with his crown and cape tail?"
"My son, it's just a strip of fog.")

"Du liebes Kind, komm, geh mit mir!
Gar schöne Spiele spiel' ich mit dir;
Manch' bunte Blumen sind an dem Strand,
Meine Mutter hat manch gülden Gewand."
("You lovely child, come with me!
So many lovely games I will play with you.
Many colorful flowers are by the shore,
My mother has many golden robes.")

"Mein Vater, mein Vater, und hörest du nicht,
Was Erlenkönig mir leise verspricht?"
"Sei ruhig, bleibe ruhig, mein Kind;
In dürren Blättern säuselt der Wind."
("My father, my father, can't you hear,
The promises the Elf King is whispering to me?"
"Be quiet, stay quiet, my child;
It's just the dry leaves rustling in the wind.")

"Willst, feiner Knabe, du mit mir gehn?
Meine Töchter sollen dich warten schön;
Meine Töchter führen den nächtlichen Reihn,
Und wiegen und tanzen und singen dich ein."
("Fine lad, will you come with me?
My daughters will tend to you;
My daughters will put you to bed every night,
And cuddle and sing and dance you to sleep.")

"Mein Vater, mein Vater, und siehst du nicht dort
Erlkönigs Töchter am düstern Ort?"
"Mein Sohn, mein Sohn, ich seh es genau:
Es scheinen die alten Weiden so grau."
("My father, My father, can't you see over there?
The Elf King's daughters at that dreary place?"
"My son, my son, I see it clearly,
It's just the old willows so grey.")

"Ich liebe dich, mich reizt deine schöne Gestalt;
Und bist du nicht willig, so brauch ich Gewalt."
"Mein Vater, mein Vater, jetzt faßt er mich an!
Erlkönig hat mir ein Leids getan!"
("I love you, your beautiful figure excites me;
And if you're not willing, then I will use force."
"My father, my father, he's grabbing me!
The Elf King has done something terrible to me!")

*At this point, the Barrow-Downs Society of Elf-Friends storms the stage with Anguirel at their head, brandishing a frozen tuna.*

"Have at thee, scoundrel! How dare you spread such lies about the Elves?"

"But it's just a song."

*Anguirel stares threateningly while tapping the fish against his hand. Panakeia whimpers and turns to the judges.*

Umm. In light of the situation, I'd like to withdraw my entry. Instead, I'll sing "Bridge Over Troubled Water." It's a tune by Paul Simon, and I think Sam might have liked to sing it to Frodo.

When you’re weary, feeling small,
When tears are in your eyes, I will dry them all;
I’m on your side. When times get rough
And friends just can’t be found,
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.

When you’re down and out,
When you’re near defeat,
When evening falls so hard
I will comfort you.
I’ll take your part.
Oh, when darkness comes
And pain is all around,
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.

Sail along, silver ship,
Sail on by.
Your time has come to shine.
All your dreams are on their way.
See how they shine
Oh, if you need a friend
I’m sailing right behind.

Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will ease your mind.

(EDIT: I hope you don't mind making an appearance, Ang. It seemed appropriate, given our history in a certain other thread. But just give me the word, and I'll take out the reference to you.)

[Anguirel]

No, it's fine...though I was enjoying the Schubert...