Friends of Nimrodel: Tapestry of Dreams - Discussion - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Formendacil · 07-06-2006, 03:20 PM

Okay, I've editted the post again. I do not think it smacks any more of confrontation, but more of Tharonwë trying to get on Aragorn's good side.

Assuming that the post is done... I think Erebemlin or Taitheneb needs to give Elessar a fuller account of matters in the swamp, eventually being coerced by Aragorn/Arwen to reveal the Amroth matter- at least, that's what Alak and I seemed to have agreed on.

During the course of that, Aragorn agrees to "hold Tharonwe without bail", so to speak, until the matter can be brought to a proper trial. Tharonwe's response, I presume, will be to appear to acquiese to this decision, with the full appearance of planning to acquit himself. He is thus rather rather underwatched when he makes his escape to pursue Amroth's company thereafter.

At least... that's the jist of what I understand comes next... but it's LMP or Alak's turn to post, so I'm not concerned overmuch.

Oh, and I rather like the constant refining of the post... makes for a much smoother end result. Although... since I've saved no copies... there's no going back if it worsens...

littlemanpoet · 07-06-2006, 06:39 PM

Only in moments of greatest climactic import does the reader of LotR "hear" osanwë. The best example is on top of Amon Hen: "Fool! Take the Ring off!" Instead, as mark has suggested, it is most often described from the outside from the point of view of a Hobbit. Well, we have no Hobbits at our disposal in this tale, and only one Man, whose mind is an apparent battleground for osanwë. So maybe we need one of the humans present at this scene, to offer the thing from her(his) perspective?

Here's the heart of the niggle: it's easy to write words in dialogue form to represent osanwë ... too easy. I feel like we lose something in the gain of ease. Mystery, wonder. If we describe osanwë at one remove, I bet we come up with a more evocative tale.

Or maybe we just remind ourselves that this is an RP and not bog ourselves down with all that....

alaklondewen · 07-06-2006, 07:00 PM

I can see what you are saying, lmp, so how does that effect the way we've written this story thus far? I know I have used the dialogue Osanwë many times with Erebemlin and Taitheneb, mostly when no other characters were present. I know these are not the only occasions when it was used. What do you suggest?

mark12_30 · 07-06-2006, 08:50 PM

Now I'm afraid to go back and look.... I suspect that I also have been guilty of blabber-osanwe. **blush**

littlemanpoet · 07-07-2006, 03:28 AM

There's no point in going back and changing what has already been written .... except, perhaps, further revising Formy's post, if we feel up to it.

Allow me to jump on the other side of the fence a moment: I love writing Tharonwe getting into the minds of others. But I notice that I do this in images at least, if not more than, words. Most of what passed between Raefindan and Tharonwe was verbal dialogue. I didn't make a conscious effort to avoid 'osanwë-blabber', but I guess it turns out that way.

So maybe one way of dealing with osanwë in a more creative manner, if deal we must, writing from the perspective of Elves as often as not, is to use a different sense than hearing. Imagine 'smelling' osanwë, or 'touching', or 'tasting'. I have no idea what that might be like as I haven't tried it, but I have tried 'seeing', and I liked what resulted. The 'other' senses would be good to thread into the rest of our writing as well, for that matter.

Oh, and on a completely different side-note: I have got to figure out a way to get Jorje back into this story.

Aylwen Dreamsong · 07-07-2006, 12:12 PM

Just to let you all know, I'm back from my trip.

It was amazing...we saw a lot of people and animals there. It helped me to appreciate hot water and flushing toilet paper down the toilet.

Also, I'm no longer afraid of spiders.

-Aylwen

alaklondewen · 07-08-2006, 02:45 PM

Welcome back, Aylwen! I'm glad you had such a nice time!

I'm currently rereading the parts of the story in the swamp to ensure my details are right for Erebemlin's part in the next post. I want to be sure I'm using his memory and not mine, because I forget too much! And can I say 'wow', what we have put our character's through is so emotionally draining. Great read, though.

Anyway, I'm working on it.

So, what's going on at the inn?

07-06-2006, 03:20 PM	#1
Formendacil Dead Serious Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Perched on Thangorodrim's towers. Posts: 3,328	Okay, I've editted the post again. I do not think it smacks any more of confrontation, but more of Tharonwë trying to get on Aragorn's good side. Assuming that the post is done... I think Erebemlin or Taitheneb needs to give Elessar a fuller account of matters in the swamp, eventually being coerced by Aragorn/Arwen to reveal the Amroth matter- at least, that's what Alak and I seemed to have agreed on. During the course of that, Aragorn agrees to "hold Tharonwe without bail", so to speak, until the matter can be brought to a proper trial. Tharonwe's response, I presume, will be to appear to acquiese to this decision, with the full appearance of planning to acquit himself. He is thus rather rather underwatched when he makes his escape to pursue Amroth's company thereafter. At least... that's the jist of what I understand comes next... but it's LMP or Alak's turn to post, so I'm not concerned overmuch. Oh, and I rather like the constant refining of the post... makes for a much smoother end result. Although... since I've saved no copies... there's no going back if it worsens... __________________ I prefer history, true or feigned.

07-06-2006, 06:39 PM	#2
littlemanpoet Itinerant Songster Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: The Edge of Faerie Posts: 7,066	Just one niggle. Only in moments of greatest climactic import does the reader of LotR "hear" osanwë. The best example is on top of Amon Hen: "Fool! Take the Ring off!" Instead, as mark has suggested, it is most often described from the outside from the point of view of a Hobbit. Well, we have no Hobbits at our disposal in this tale, and only one Man, whose mind is an apparent battleground for osanwë. So maybe we need one of the humans present at this scene, to offer the thing from her(his) perspective? Here's the heart of the niggle: it's easy to write words in dialogue form to represent osanwë ... too easy. I feel like we lose something in the gain of ease. Mystery, wonder. If we describe osanwë at one remove, I bet we come up with a more evocative tale. Or maybe we just remind ourselves that this is an RP and not bog ourselves down with all that....

07-06-2006, 07:00 PM	#3
alaklondewen Song of Seregon Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Following the road less traveled Posts: 1,193	I can see what you are saying, lmp, so how does that effect the way we've written this story thus far? I know I have used the dialogue Osanwë many times with Erebemlin and Taitheneb, mostly when no other characters were present. I know these are not the only occasions when it was used. What do you suggest? __________________ At last I understand why we have waited! This is the ending. Now not day only shall be beloved, but night too shall be beautiful and blessed and all its fear pass away!

07-06-2006, 08:50 PM	#4
mark12_30 Stormdancer of Doom Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Elvish singing is not a thing to miss, in June under the stars Posts: 4,349	Now I'm afraid to go back and look.... I suspect that I also have been guilty of blabber-osanwe. blush __________________ ...down to the water to see the elves dance and sing upon the midsummer's eve.

07-07-2006, 12:12 PM	#6
Aylwen Dreamsong The Melody of Misery Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: The Island of Conclusions (You get there by jumping!)... Posts: 1,147	Just to let you all know, I'm back from my trip. It was amazing...we saw a lot of people and animals there. It helped me to appreciate hot water and flushing toilet paper down the toilet. Also, I'm no longer afraid of spiders. -Aylwen __________________ ...Come down now, they'll say. But everything looks perfect from far away - Come down now! But we'll stay.

07-07-2006, 03:28 AM	#5
littlemanpoet Itinerant Songster Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: The Edge of Faerie Posts: 7,066	There's no point in going back and changing what has already been written .... except, perhaps, further revising Formy's post, if we feel up to it. Allow me to jump on the other side of the fence a moment: I love writing Tharonwe getting into the minds of others. But I notice that I do this in images at least, if not more than, words. Most of what passed between Raefindan and Tharonwe was verbal dialogue. I didn't make a conscious effort to avoid 'osanwë-blabber', but I guess it turns out that way. So maybe one way of dealing with osanwë in a more creative manner, if deal we must, writing from the perspective of Elves as often as not, is to use a different sense than hearing. Imagine 'smelling' osanwë, or 'touching', or 'tasting'. I have no idea what that might be like as I haven't tried it, but I have tried 'seeing', and I liked what resulted. The 'other' senses would be good to thread into the rest of our writing as well, for that matter. Oh, and on a completely different side-note: I have got to figure out a way to get Jorje back into this story.

07-08-2006, 02:45 PM	#7
alaklondewen Song of Seregon Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Following the road less traveled Posts: 1,193	Welcome back, Aylwen! I'm glad you had such a nice time! I'm currently rereading the parts of the story in the swamp to ensure my details are right for Erebemlin's part in the next post. I want to be sure I'm using his memory and not mine, because I forget too much! And can I say 'wow', what we have put our character's through is so emotionally draining. Great read, though. Anyway, I'm working on it. So, what's going on at the inn? __________________ At last I understand why we have waited! This is the ending. Now not day only shall be beloved, but night too shall be beautiful and blessed and all its fear pass away!

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