Beren and Lúthien - Changes needed

[Aiwendil]

My apologies again for the terrible state of neglect in which I've left this project. Here are my comments on the remainder of the original Beren and Luthien changes.

BL-SL-06: I’m inclined to think that the discrepancy between the Lay and QS77 can be put down to compression.

BL-RG-40: Let’s retain the plural:

BL-RG-40 {Thu's messengers}[Sauron’s heralds].

BL-RG-41: Without the “thou”, the sentence is no longer grammatical. I suggest:

BL-RG-41 {when} [with] {Thu thou}[Sauron] {vanquishedst}[vanquished], what need

BL-RG-42: I suppose this is justifiable.

BL-RG-45: I think we must look for a better solution to this line. The best case would be that we could keep the first line and find a new rhyme for “new”. Let’s see:

BL-RG-45I fare with hasty tidings new (3770)
{to Morgoth }from[Sauron, Morgoth’s servant true]{forest-haunting Thu}.

Not great, I know. Perhaps there’s another rhyme for “new” that could be used.

BL-RG-48: I suppose “Gods” is all right in this instance.

BL-EX-12: I like the idea of incorporating details from the synopsis, but I think this sentence has become a little unwieldy. I suggest:

But Thingol learned that Lúthien had journeyed far from Doriath, for messages came secretly from Celegorm, as has been told, saying that Felagund was dead, and Beren was dead, BL-EX-12{but Lúthien was in Nargothrond, and that Celegorm would wed her.} and <Lay; Synopsis V that Celegorm {will}would make himself king of Narog{,}[;] and while telling him that Lúthien {is}was safe in Nargothrond and treating for her hand, {hints}it hinted that she {will}would not return: it also {warns}warned him to trouble not the matter of the Silmarils.>

BL-EX-16.3: Unfortunately, I have none of the VT and I have not seen Eldarin Hands – but I’ll take your word for it. I think that the splicing has left an ungrammatical sentence though, so I’d suggest:

BL-EX-16.3{And}<Eldarin Hands, Fingers & Numerals, VT47 ‘My hand holds the jewel’, Beren said and> {Beren}[he] put forth his left hand, slowly opening its fingers; but it was empty. BL-EX-16.5<Eldarin Hands, Fingers & Numerals, VT47 ‘Alas!’ said Beren, ‘it is in the other hand, but that is not here.’>

I have yet to look carefully over the changes Findegil proposed in the last two posts. As for introducing some details of the hunting of the wolf from BoLT - I was going to suggest that myself!

I will, I hope, be able to go back over the unresolved points and look for better solutions to some lines this week.