Mixed up movies game

[Elennar Starfire]

Something C-3PO said to Han when they were going through the asteroid field.

Ah, yes, I remember that now! [img]smilies/redface.gif[/img] How embarrassing, mixing up Star Wars and Star Trek!

Now, for my mix-up:

Gollum: *singing* Do not forsake me, oh my precioussss...

(From High Noon)

[Finwe]

Saruman: The Ring is lost Gandalf, it was lost a long time ago. Perhaps the Ring doesn't want to be found.

Gandalf: Everything lost is meant to be found.

[Elennar Starfire]

This time I don't have a silly script to post, but I do have an amusing and true story.

I was watching FotR with the sound muted, and listening to the soundtrack of PotC. As Aragorn was searching for athelas, and Arwen comes up, ("what's this? A ranger, caught off his guard?") some very nice, quiet music was playing. Then just as the scene changed to Arwen getting off the horse and walking towards Frodo, the 'evil pirates' music started. I found it quite amusing, and recommend that you try something like that sometime. Heeheehee, evil Arwen. [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]

[Kransha]

*Frodo sees Ringwraith on fellbeast flying over him*
Frodo: GO FLIPPER! WOOOOOOOOOO!

*Eowyn cuts of the Witch-King's arm*
Eowyn: You make me sad. Come, Merry!
Witch-King: Oh, a coward are you? Have at you, you pansy!
Merry: But your arms gone!
Witch-King: Its only a flesh wound.

*Baromir swinging his sword at Amon Hen*
Baromir: My name's Baromir of Gondor and don't you forget it! SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND!
*gets shot by orcs*
Baromir: *dying* FREEEEEDOMMMMMMM *dies*
Elrond: *coming out of nowhere* All things come to an end. It is....inevitable.

*Pippin outside the Black Gate*
Pippin: They call me MR. TOOK!
Troll: Duuuuuuh?
Pippin: Death to you! Death to your children! Death to your children's children! Death your friends! Death to your friends' children! Death to all the children! Kill the children!!!!!!
Troll: Duuuuuuuuuuuuh?
Troll #2: Won't somebody think of the children?

[Eorl of Rohan]

There seem to be a lot of "Star Wars + lotr" going on here, and I have no idea what "Star Wars" is. It's some kind of movie, right?

[Meneltarmacil]

There seem to be a lot of "Star Wars + lotr" going on here, and I have no idea what "Star Wars" is. It's some kind of movie, right?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !

*dies fifty billion times*

*giggle* You have *giggle* GOT to be *giggle* kidding. Who hasn't heard of Star Wars?

I'm mean, aren't I?

[Nimrothiel]

*joins Meneltarmacil in helpless laughter*

Seriously, you HAVE to be joking. I've never met anyone who hasn't heard of "Star Wars," you're right that it is a movie though; so you must have heard something about it. It's actually a series of six movies which were released in two separate trilogies; the second of which will be completed with the release of the third movie of the trilogy in June of 2005. So you are better informed, here is a list of the five movies of the series that you can currently rent/buy (in order according to release):

Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope

Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back

Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi

Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace

Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones

Now get to a movie rental store and at least read the backs of the boxes so you have some clue about how the "Star Wars/Lord of the Rings" spoofs work! [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

I should try that LotR/PotC thing; "evil Arwen." *snickers* [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]

[Elennar Starfire]

Theoden/Saruman: You have no power here, Gandalf Stormcrow! Be gone, before somebody drops a house on you!
_____________________________________________

Elrond: It was forged in the fires of Mt. Doom. Only there can it be unmade. *starts singing* Put that thing back where it came from or so help me...Get that thing away from me, you guys! Put that thing back where it came from, or I'll poke myself in the eye!

<font size=1 color=339966>[ 6:53 PM January 31, 2004: Message edited by: Elennar Starfire ]

[zb]

Here goes... I grew up on British television, let's see how many lotr mixups I can do.

Hetty Wainthropp Investigates:

at the gates of Moria
GANDALF is trying to find the right password to open the gates.
PIPPIN: You'll have to think laterally.
MERRY: What, lie down and think?

Yeah, the quote's not quite right, but if you've seen the show you'll get it...

Or the Goodies:
FRODO: What's on the menu?
SAM: Well, there's lembas, lembas cake, fried lembas, or chicken suprise.
FRODO: I'll have the chicken surprise.
SAM presents him with a piece of lembas.
FRODO: But this is lembas!
SAM: That's the suprise.

Jonathan Creek:
at the Prancing Pony
FRODO has just disappeared.
ARWEN to ARAGORN: But how does a hobbit just disappear like that?
ARAGORN: Hmm...
ARAGORN and ARWEN traipse around the countryside for a bit, talking to people, looking for clues, being puzzled by the mystery and nearly being killed.
ARWEN: I know, Barliman Butterbur threw a cloak of invisiblity over Frodo!
ARAGORN carefully but with exasperation explains why ARWEN is wrong.
ARWEN: I know, Frodo didn't really disappear, he had a stunt double do it for him!
ARAGORN: But that doesn't explain why someone disappeared.
They continue to look for clues.
AUDIENCE: Yeah, how did Frodo disappear like that?!
ARAGORN: I got it!
He proceeds to explain how he deduced Frodo's posession of the Ring, and the Ring's power, from the fact that the floor at the Pony hadn't been swept properly, and the shape of Frodo's ears.
AUDIENCE: he is so smart!

Black Books:
ARAGORN: (wearing an accordion) Hello! I've come to serenade you. I can't play guitar. I can't play this either, but I thought it would be less obvious. So if you could just kind of stand there and look wistful, and I...
EOWYN: No thanks, goodbye.
{coupla lines cut so scene makes lotr sense}
ARAGORN: But... but... (holds up a bunch of flowers)
EOWYN: Get lost!
ARAGORN: No no. You're my summer girlfriend. You don't get angry. You throw your head back and laugh as we bicycle around the Cotswolds in a taxi. You flick the cherry off the pie and only eat the cream because that's what Auntie Nibs used to do.
EOWYN: What?

(obviously, this is something movie-aragorn would do, rather than book-Aragorn)

[Miriel Undomiel]

I haven't seen all the Star Wars movies, but monday night when I go to bed, I will dream about 'the Return of the Kin...erm..Jedi'(I always dream about the movies I've seen). They've shown one off the old movies every monday for three weeks now on TV. So I didn't get the 'don't tell me the odds' thing until last monday. [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

[Nimrothiel]

I've got more quotes, but I will be posting them in minimal quantities as I have about eight pages worth of them. So, here's the first chunk:

Hama: Who goes there?
Gandalf: I am Mithrandir. Hurry and tell Theoden that a storm is coming. I have ridden all the way from Fangorn to consult with him.
Hama: Ridden? Ridden what?
Gandalf: Ridden a horse!
Hama: I don't see any horse. That's just a pair of coconuts you're rattling!
Gandalf: So what's wrong with coconuts?
Hama: Well you can't be using coconuts! Where'd you get 'em? Coconuts are tropical, you know, and this is a temperate clime!
Gandalf: So a bird carried them--a crebain! Now go and tell Theoden....
Hama: A crebain? Now hold on a moment, a five-ounce crebain can not carry a one-pound coconut!
Gandalf: Look, I need to speak with Theoden--
Hama: The air flight velocity of a crebain is--
Gandalf: Summon Theoden at once! We have little time! If you don't call him, I shall blast this door down through the hall and out the other end!
Monty Python And The Holy Grail

Witch King: Are you the Ring-bearer?
Frodo: Um. No.
Nazgûl 2: But if he really was the Ring-bearer, he wouldn't say he was one, would he, Number 1?
Witch King: Oh, that's true!
Frodo: All right then. Yes, I am the Ring-bearer!
Nazgûls: He is the Ring-bearer!! He is the Ring-bearer!!
Monty Python’s Life Of Brian

Grishnah: Any last requests?
Merry: Yeah, loosen the knot and let me go.
The Mummy

Pippin: Are we there yet?
Strider: No.
Pippin: Are we there yet?
Strider: No.
Pippin: Are we there yet?
Strider: No!
Pippin: Are we (Strider stabs his knife right between Pippin’s fingers.) Wow, that's amazing! Perfect aim!
Strider: What are you talking about? I missed.
The Mummy Returns

Boromir: You ever been with a woman?
Aragorn: I gotta get the family farm back before I start worrying about that.
O Brother, Where Art Thou?

At end of FOTR…
Legolas: Wait a minute. Who elected you leader of this outfit?
Aragorn: Well Leggy, I figured it should be the one with the capacity for abstract thought. But if that ain't the consensus view, then hell, let's put it to a vote.
Legolas: Suits me. I'm voting for yours truly.
Aragorn: Well I'm voting for yours truly too.
(Aragorn and Legolas look at Gimli for the deciding vote.)
Gimli: Okay... I'm with you fellas.
O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Legolas in Moria: Well, it didn't look like a two-horse town, but try finding a decent hair jelly.
O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Celeborn: You are a pretty old dame, aren't you. What are you doing with a dotty old son-of-a-***** like me?
Galadriel: Well... I haven't the faintest idea.
On Golden Pond

Aragorn at Helm’s Deep: Now I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country.
Patton

Sam: I have some rope up here, but I do not think you would accept my help, since I am only waiting around to kill you.
Gollum: That does put a damper on our relationship.
The Princess Bride

Gandalf the White: I do not mean to pry, but you don't by any chance happen to have four fingers on your right hand?
Frodo: Do you always begin conversations this way?
The Princess Bride

Legolas: Is it possible? Is it possible to improve on perfection?
The Quick And The Dead

Aragorn: I need a woman.
Arwen: You need a bath.
The Quick and the Dead

Gimli to Legolas, as Balrog shows up: We should have brought shotguns for this job.
Pulp Fiction

Boromir: Why did it have to be a cave troll? I hate cave trolls.
Raiders of the Lost Ark

Gandalf: Meet me at the Prancing Pony. Be ready for me. I'm going after that wizard.
Frodo: How?
Gandalf: I don't know, I'm making this up as I go.
Raiders Of The Lost Ark

<font size=1 color=339966>[ 10:20 AM February 03, 2004: Message edited by: Nimrothiel ]

[Kransha]

BIG LIST OF FAMOUS MOVIE HYPER RIP-OFF SCENES!

TTT, Uruk-hai...

Random Orc: I'M HUNGRY!
*Ugluk chops his head off*
Ugluk: DINNER TIME!!!
Grishnakh: I had his liver with some fava beans and nice Chianti.
Ugluk: Play the game, orcy, play the game!
*Grishnakh turns to Pippin*
Grishnakh: So we meet again, for the first and last time!
Pippin: You talkin' to me? YOU TALKIN' TO ME?
Grishnakh: Well, yes.
*Suddenly Treebeard stomps the orc and picks up Pippin and Merry*
Merry: (has no idea whats going on) I'm on top of the world, ma!
Pippin: Who are you?
Treebeard: We are the knights who say....HOOM!
Pippin: (singing) The treeeeeeees are aliiiiiiive!

FotR, The Mirror of Galadriel...

Galadriel: Here's lookin' at you, kid.
Frodo: Nice....mirror you got there.
Galadriel: SEE THE LIGHT!
*Frodo looks into the mirror and sees the Eye of Sauron*
Eye of Sauron: Mammy, nyah!
Frodo: NOOOO! IT's IMPOSSIBLE!
*turns to Galadriel*
Frodo: You take it!
Galadriel: (getting all evil-ish) I'm ready for my close-up, Mr. DeMille!
Frodo: (meekly) There's no place like home.

More later.

[Miriel Undomiel]

PotC:
Pippin: Whos side are you on?
Treebeard: At the moment?

Aragorn in Fangorn: Who are you? Show yourself!
Legolas: No one. He's no one. Distant cousin of my Aunt's nephew twice removed. Lovely singing voice. Eunuch.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Star Wars: the Return of the Jedi:
Aragorn: Boromir, you can't die.
Boromir: Strong am I with the Force, but not that strong.

When they enter the Mines of Moria:
Legolas:I think my eyes are getting better. Instead of a big dark blur, I see a big light blur.
Gimli: Theres nothing to see. I used to live here, you know.
Legolas: You're going to die here, you know. Convenient.

[zb]

Still on my British kick... From "How to Irritate People", by John Cleese et al. Again, apologies for blatant adlibbing in my quotes:

scene: at Helm's Deep. A line of 3 elven soldiers are standing behind a single Rohirrim at the wall.

John Cleese (voiceover): Here, we have a legitimiate Rohirrim soldier. Observe the Pepperpots in action.
Elf 1: Oooh!
Elf 2: Aaah!
Elf 3: Well I never!
Elves (together): tch tch tch!
Elf 1: Oooh!
Elf 2: Aaah!
Elf 3: Well I never!
Elves (together): tch tch tch!
Rohirrim soldier looks back at elves, irritated.
JC: One of the major strategies of pepperpots is to delight in pointing out the obvious.
Elf 1: The orcs have arrows!
Elf 2: That one's aiming his bow!
Elf 3: He's shot the arrow!
Elves (together): He's shot the arrow! He's shot the arrow!
Arrow narrowly misses Aragorn
Elf 1: Did you see that?
Elf 2: It just missed Aragorn!
Elf 3: Well I never!
Elves (together) It just missed Aragorn!
RS glares at them, making a shushing motion
Elf 1: Oooh!
Elf 2: Aaah!
Elf 3: Well I never!
Elves (glaring at RS): tch tch tch!
JC: Pepperpots also tend to laugh inappropriately.
Elf 1: Gimli is short!
They all laugh loudly
RS looks like he's about to jump off battlement in frustration
JC: Observe now their response to the legitimate laughter of the legitimate soldier.
The hyena lemmings appear in all their hilarity, being driven by Boromir (back from the dead) doing his funky disco moves, flanked by downsters doing the wave
Rohirrim soldier lets out a small chuckle
Elf 1: Sssh!
Elf 2: Sssh!
Elf 3: Sssh!


(Turns out the Legitimate Rohirrim Soldier was none other than Hama, and one of his many deaths was caused by the insanity which was induced by the elves...)

[Nimrothiel]

*"Oooh! Aaaah! Well I never! Tch, tch, tch."*
Roflmao!!! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] I've got another group of them here:

Theoden at Helm’s Deep: What do we do?
Aragorn: Well, surrounding them's out.
Rambo III

Aragorn: Who are you?
Lurtz: Your worst nightmare.
Rambo III

Frodo: All that hate'll burn you up.
Gollum: Keeps me warm.
Red Dawn

Hama: You leave your weapons with those guys over there.
Aragorn: No way. A ranger never relinquishes his sword. (The gang all point their swords at him.) Here you go.
Red Heat

Aragorn: A real man admits his fears. That's what I'm asking you to do here tonight. Who wants to go first?
Frodo: I'm afraid of spiders, Coach.
The Replacements

Frodo: We're the good guys. Why are we running?
Aragorn: We're not running. We're eluding.
Rising Sun

Frodo to Boromir: No man controls my destiny. Especially not one who attacks downwind and reeks of garlic.
Robin Hood Prince of Thieves

Gandalf to Elrond: Well, I'm one of those fortunate people who like my job, sir. Got my first magic set when I was seven, blew my eyebrows off, we never saw the cat again, been into it ever since.
The Rock

Aragorn: Have you ever been in a combat situation?
Frodo: Define combat, sir.
Aragorn: Leggy...
Legolas: An incursion overland to unmake an invincible ring pursued by an elite team of Uruk-Hai carrying 15 guided rockets armed with VX poison gas.
Frodo: Oh. In that case; no, sir.
The Rock

Sauron (donning headgear): How do I look?
Mouth Of Sauron: Like a hood ornament.
The Rocketeer

Elrond: And crawling on this planet's face, some insects called the human race.
The Rocky Horror Picture Show

Aragorn: What have you done to Frodo?!
Boromir: Nothing. Why, do you think I should?
The Rocky Horror Picture Show

Gandalf (describing Gollum): Picture a hobbit who took a nose dive from the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.
Saving Private Ryan

Aragorn: Shorty, if you go to class once in a while you would learn.
Pippin: I do go to class.
Aragorn: Shorty, lunch is not a class.
Pippin: It is if you got the munchies.
Scary Movie

Aragorn on seeing Balrog: I don't know about you, but I am planning to scream and run.
Short Circuit

Gandalf: Oh, you're a girl Balrog!
Shrek

Gandalf to Pippin in Moria: What you are doing is the opposite of help!
Shrek

Elrond: Some of you may die, but it’s a sacrifice…I am willing to make.
Shrek

Legolas re Aragorn: You're looking at a legend.
Boromir: I guess a legend and an out-of-work bum look a lot a like.
Smokey and The Bandit

Sam in Mordor: Water... water...
Frodo: Room service... room service...
Spaceballs

Boromir: There will come a time, boy, when you'll wish you never met me.
Frodo: Mister, I'm already there.
Speed

Gandalf whispering to Company at mountain: Saruman can see you....that's how he knows what we're doing....
Speed

Sam: I'm such a yokel. There. I said it.
Speed

[Nimrothiel]

Boromir: "And why should the people listen to you?"
Aragorn: "Because, unlike other Elessars, I can speak with a Gondorian accent."
All: "Oooo!" ~Robin Hood: Men in Tights

[Miriel Undomiel]

When Gandalf shows up in Fangorn: Hey guys, I'm back!
Aragorn: You were gone?
~the Ice Storm

[Elennar Starfire]

A backwards one for Hidalgo:

During any of the race scenes...

Noro lim, Hidalgo, noro lim!

[Eowyn Skywalker]

Okay, I was to lazy to read all of these, so if these have already been done, I beg pardon, and ask for forgivness... Wait, I haave a lightsaber... I don't have to do that.
Well, anyways...

Star Wars (Yes, I know that Star Wars and the Matrix are way overdone, but still...)
Rivendell:
Elrond: The Force is strong with you, young Baggins.
Frodo: Coooooooool.
Elrond: He is the chosen one.
Gandalf: Must you defy the counsel again, Master?

Bree:
Aragorn: Are you frightened?
Frodo: No.
Aragorn: You will be.

Orthanc:
Saruman: You must join with me, Gandalf the Gray, and together, we shall defeat the Sith.
Gandalf: What Sith?
Saruman: Haven't you watched the Attack of the Clones?

Lothlorien
Galadriel: The Dark Side has clouded my vision of the Mirror, I can no longer see the future clearly.

Helms Deep
Aragorn: That's no orc army, it's a battle station!
Theoden: What's a battle station?

Caradhras
Legolas: A fell voice is on the air!
Aragorn: That's no voice, it's a battle station!

Ithilien
Smeagol: Go away, and never come back!
Gollum: Frodo never told you what happened to your father, did he?
Smeagol: He told me enough. He told me that you killed him.
Gollum: No, Smeagol. That's not true. You see, I am your father.
Smeagol: Nooooo... wait... you're me, that's impossible.
Gollum: No. Not impossible. Inevitable.

The Matrix
Moria:
Balrog: Are you surprised to see me, Mr. Lathspell?
Gandalf: No.
Balrog: Then you know what happened?

Gimli: Legolas, two already!
Legolas: Really? I'm on seventeen!
Gimli: What?! That's impossible!
Legolas: No, it is inevitable...

Pirates of the Carribean:

Gandalf: CONFOUND IT ALL, SAMWISE GAMGEE, HEAVE YOU BEEN EAVESDROPPING?
Sam: No sir...
Frodo: I am no simpleton, Sam. You knew my father.
Sam: No, I am your father, Mr. Frodo.

(I couldn't resist.)

Moria
Gandalf: YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!!!
Balrog: Ahhhhhhh...
Gandalf: (Falls down) Remember this as the day that you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow................

The plains of Rohan
Gimli: Just how far are you willing to go to save the hobbits, Aragorn?
Aragorn: I'd die for them.
Gimli: Ah, good. No worries then.

So, how's that? I'm sorry if some were already used, take it that they were so good as to come from more than one mind... renenber, great minds think alike. There were so many that I've used before...

(Luke: You stole my lightsaber, prepare to die!)
(Umm, uh-oh...)
(Runs)

-Eowyn Skywalker

[The half-elven]

In Osgiliath, Flash back in TTT

Boromir (to Denathor): But Mother...

Denathor: I'm your father.

Boromir: But Father, I don't want to go to Rivendel; I just want to...SING!