Reverse the Story!

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

Sure, I love parodies of LotR, but I noticed one thing...they use the same story in the same order! Well, not anymore. Now we begin the story from the Grey Havens and somehow find our way back to A Long-Expected Party.

Will we do it? I hope so.

Later days! [img]smilies/cool.gif[/img]
->Elenrod

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

I'll do the first(or is it the last?) chapter...

CHAPTER I: The Grey Havens or The Council of Melkor

“There they go now,” Sam stifled the tears as he followed the white Telerin ship disappear into the horizon. ”You crying too, guys?”
“Wow. They actually left,” said Merry.
“Yesss, precious. They lefts without usss, gollum,” added Sméagol.
“Hey, what brings you here, Slinker? Thought you fell into Mt. Doom,” Sam questioned the surprise visitor.
“Why, stupid fat hobbit? We swims, yes? We does.”
“Yeah, you can, but that was lava…13 to 22 hundred degrees.”
“What’s lava, precious? What’s lava?”
“Never mind…hey, Pip. What’s wrong?”
Indeed, Pippin was silent, with his head bowed. He bore the countenance of one in deep thought.
“Nothing. It’s just that…long have I waited for the departure of that foolofaMaiaofIrmo. Now, he is gone, and none can hinder my plans.” He then uttered a long, hideous laugh.
“What’s wrong with him, precious?” Gollum inquired. “He scares us, yes he doesss.”
“This happened before,” answered Merry. “Pip, did you eat those hallucinogenic mushrooms again?”
“Nay,” Pippin responded. “You don’t understand. I’m not Pippin.” As he said it, he took of his mask, revealing…
“ [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] …M-m-m-Morgoth?” Sam stammered.
“Yes, it is I!” the Ainu answered. “I re-entered Arda to…” He was promptly interrupted by the sound of rustling leaves behind them. The dense foliage parted, revealing…
“Mr. Frodo?” Sam was getting more confused by the second.
“Crap!” he cursed. “Guys! We missed the boat!” he shouted at his back.
“What?” Gandalf cried. “Elrond, I told you not to oversleep!”
“Hey! I’m sorry!” was Elrond’s rejoinder. “A growing guy needs his sleep.”
“Yeah,” said Galadriel. “And a growing guy doesn’t take Valium. You’re practically an antique!” Noticing the tall profile of a stranger besides the diminutive hobbits, she looked intently at the face. “Melkor? A wonderful surprise!”
“Galadriel, the lesbian from Valinor. Still playing rugby?”
“Not anymore. The cardboard cut-out hates it. By the way, thanks for getting rid of my pesky uncle.”
“My pleasure.”
“Hey!” Pippin cried. “That’s the guy from ‘Silly Maiar!’”
“No, you foolofaTook!” said Gandalf, as he bonked the hobbit in the head with his staff. “That was Silmarillion.”
“The great Olórin. We meet again.”
“Morgoth? But I thought you were…”
“…imprisoned in the Void? Nay, Master Maia, I have been ordained by Ilúvatar himself, to hold this council.” He pulled down a projector screen and continued speaking. “This guy, Sauron, was unjustly eliminated by a rag-tag band of spy-rats. Your mission, which you will accept or die, is to…”
“Oh, great,” Frodo sighed.
“Good! We have a volunteer! Your mission is to recover the Ring from Mt. Doom and send it to Sauron via a dragon-shaped rocket. Any questions?”
“Great. Where are we going?” asked Elrond.

<font size=1 color=339966>[ 8:57 PM December 09, 2003: Message edited by: Nilpaurion Felagund ]