Crazy Captions - Page 254 - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

dancing spawn of ungoliant · 03-24-2006, 09:18 AM

The very reason why one should never keep toothpaste and foot lotion next to each other on a bathroom shelf.

Frodo: Oh well, at least my feet are now safe from acid attacks.

edit: This is my 100th caption!

Holbytlass · 03-24-2006, 05:12 PM

Doing spit bubbles is cute when you're two!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by dancing spawn of ungoliant

This is my 100th caption!

Mine, too!

Gurthang · 03-24-2006, 06:29 PM

Frodo found out the hard way that adding real vanilla to ice cream is not very tasty.

The Elf-warrior · 03-24-2006, 08:03 PM

Butterbur: "Wanna hear some more knock-knock jokes?"

Frodo: "No!"

narfforc · 03-24-2006, 08:14 PM

Frodo to Barliman: What are you grinning about?

Barliman: It's painted on this way, but if it wasn't I'd still have a good laugh at your big hairy feet, and that wig you've got on.

Formendacil · 03-24-2006, 11:49 PM

The animated version of Gollum was too fat, with too much hair, and wore clothes, but the animators had been spot on with the greedy and fey look in his eyes.

mormegil · 03-25-2006, 12:44 AM

Barliman: What do you mean I look like a pervert.

Hookbill the Goomba · 03-25-2006, 02:05 AM

Frodo: Oh no! He's after the Ring!

Barliman: No, I'm after your money!

OR

Barliman: Oh what big feet you have.

Frodo: All the better to kick you with.

narfforc · 03-25-2006, 03:17 AM

Frodo: Who's that strange fellow with a skirt on?

Barliman: Oh, he's one of them Strangers of the North, we call him Strides-less on account of him having no trousers.

(Sorry for the colloquialism, strides=trousers)

Lalwendë · 03-25-2006, 03:21 AM

Frodo: "I never expected to meet Les Dawson in the Prancing Pony! Got any good mother in law jokes?"

Holbytlass · 03-25-2006, 04:08 AM

Butterbur: "Now what have you been doing, Mr. Underhill? Frightening my customers and spitting on my floor!"

Nilpaurion Felagund · 03-25-2006, 04:48 AM

Butterbur: How do you like my new dentures?

Hookbill the Goomba · 03-25-2006, 12:54 PM

When Frodo dropped his wallet and it fell through the floor, Barliman was only too happy to help him out...

OR

Inspired by

Quote:

Butterbur: "Now what have you been doing, Mr. Underhill? Frightening my customers and spitting on my floor!"

Butterbur: "Now what have you been doing, Mr. Underhill? Frightening my customers and prying up the floorboards!

OR yet!

Butterbur STILL can't believe its not butter!

Meela · 03-25-2006, 02:31 PM

Butterbur: This way sir, let me show you to the oven- er, room.. will you be stewing with- I mean, staying with us long?

Frodo: Um, maybe we should leave, Sam.... Sam?

Man in corner eating: Mmmm, tater seasoning...

mormegil · 03-25-2006, 03:32 PM

Barliman: Ohhh you're cute!!!

Frodo:

Hookbill the Goomba · 03-25-2006, 03:49 PM

Butterbur: For the last time, Mr. Underhill, I can't get the white wine any whiter!

Frodo: Try putting some more milk in it...

OR

Butterbur: Wednesday night is give me all your money night! If you don't join in, you get thrown tot he Black Riders!

Alcarillo · 03-25-2006, 04:24 PM

As a child, Butterbur didn't believe his mother when she told him his face would get stuck making faces like that.

Kuruharan · 03-25-2006, 04:35 PM

Butterbur just couldn't resist sticking a whoopee cushion in Frodo's chair.

The Only Real Estel · 03-25-2006, 06:26 PM

Some are blessed with exceptional looks. Some are blessed with great intelligence. Some are blessed with both. Butterbur was blessed with neither.

narfforc · 03-25-2006, 08:11 PM

Barman Butterball: Right Mister Undersized, the karaoke starts in five minutes, your on after Legless Greenteeth and the Six Pistelves, Oh and don't sing any songs by Elvish Parsley, because Strides-less thinks he's The King.

Holbytlass · 03-25-2006, 09:10 PM

Butterbur: You'd look like this, too, if a bee stung your cheek!

Maeggaladiel · 03-26-2006, 12:01 AM

Frodo: AAHH!! It's that evil woman from The Goonies!

Hookbill the Goomba · 03-26-2006, 02:27 AM

Butterbur: So, do you think I'll get that page three-newspaper photo shoot?

Frodo: Erm... of course... *to Sam* Lets get out of here!

Gurthang · 03-26-2006, 12:20 PM

Frodo can't understand why Butterbur has his hair dyed two colors at once.

OR

Butterbur: "And I thought elves had pointy ears!"

Hookbill the Goomba · 03-26-2006, 02:47 PM

Butterbur: Ale? Toast?

Frodo: Actually, I'd like the new picture, please.

After Denethor found his pet Olyphant dead, Pippin had some explaining to do...

Pippin: I swear! I didn't do it! It was like that when I found it!

OR

Pippin: Merry! We've got our ears stuck together!

OR even!

Pippin: Merry! There's a giant Olyphant in the bath!

Merry: You don't say?

Formendacil · 03-26-2006, 02:52 PM

Harry Potter catches sight of Merry and Pippin through his invisibility cloak. (Doesn't that crinklely quality speak to an Invisibility Cloak?)

OH!!! WAIT!!!!

Merry and Pippin catch sight of Gandalf... wearing an invisible cloak!

Farael · 03-26-2006, 03:53 PM

Aragorn thought it'd be funny to throw a blanket over his head and pretend to be a ghost. After having seen some true ghosts during the battle, the joke did not go down very well with the hobbits.

narfforc · 03-26-2006, 05:02 PM

Pippin; Ha-ha Merry, how did you manage to kill that Oliphaunt with only that salami saugage your trying to hide from me.

Kitanna · 03-26-2006, 05:53 PM

The Hobbits are terrified to learn there really is such thing as an elephant graveyard.

or

The true terror of crazy glue.
Pippin: Stop pulling! You're going to rip off my ear!

Oddwen · 03-26-2006, 07:44 PM

Pippin: Hi folks, I'm Peregrin Took, and this is my dummy Merry. Say Hello Merry!

Pippin in a high voice: Hello folks!

Pippin: Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week everyone!

Parmastahir · 03-26-2006, 08:56 PM

Merry: "You killed it. You cook it!"

Pippin: "WAAAAAHHHH!!!"

Hookbill the Goomba · 03-26-2006, 11:49 PM

Pippin: Merry, The Olyphant took the top bunk!

OR

Merry: My mobile phone is vibrating... I know it's inside this armour somewhere...

Pippin: You just don't want to talk to me!

Merry: ... Erm... no comment.

Kuruharan · 03-26-2006, 11:55 PM

Merry: Look at the size of that footprint!! What could have caused it?!

Pippin: Hold me Merry, I’m scared!!!

mormegil · 03-27-2006, 12:45 AM

Merry doesn't quite know how best to help his friend in this situation

Pippin: Merry, HELP ME!!! That wedgie the orc gave me really, really hurts!!!

Hookbill the Goomba · 03-27-2006, 02:33 AM

Pippin: Merry is dead!

Merry: No I'm not!

Pippin: I can still hear his voice!

OR

Merry: What caused all this devastation?

Pippin: Gandalf the grey un-

Merry: DON'T SAY IT!

Morsul the Dark · 03-27-2006, 08:30 AM

Sort of inspired by Hookbill's "merry's dead" joke reminded me of monty python holy grail

Pippin: look a swallow carrying a cocoanut!
Merry:dont be crazy thats impossible
Pippin:Ghosts just killed these oliphant your going to tell me a swallow cant carry a cocoanut??
Merry:That depends was it an Ergion Swallow or a Haradian Swallow, im just swaying its a matter of weight ratio....

Meela · 03-27-2006, 01:18 PM

Merry: What are you crying about now?
Pippin: The oliphaunt landed on my foot!

Hookbill the Goomba · 03-27-2006, 01:58 PM

After fighting their way through an Olyphant stampede, Pippin is beyond dismay when he discovers that all the ale has run out at the victory party.

OR

It seems that the Olyphant tripped over Pippin. It hurt Pippin's back, apparently.

The Only Real Estel · 03-27-2006, 04:17 PM

The first architects at Stonehenge weren't overly stupendous...

Pippin: "Ah!!! It landed on my finger!!"

Gothmog · 03-27-2006, 04:33 PM

Pippin: NOOOOO!!!! He landed on the mushrooms!

OR

The result of Shire's Annual Beer Drinking Contest:
Oliphant: AAuuouohhh..... ZZZZZZZZZ
Pippin: Fine asch... Alchj...Ale here at oursch Ggrreeen Dshagon! One more plaesch!
Merry: Pippin, I think you've won already.

OR

Pippin: AHhhhh, disgusting!
Merry: At least we know what happens to an Oliphant with a nosebleed, don't we?

OR yet again...

Merry: A new verse is needed for this occasion... Big as a house, slayed by a mouse?

03-24-2006, 09:18 AM	#10121
dancing spawn of ungoliant Mischievous Candle Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: So near to Russia, so far from Japan, quite a long way from Cairo, lots of miles from Vietnam. Posts: 1,267	The very reason why one should never keep toothpaste and foot lotion next to each other on a bathroom shelf. Frodo: Oh well, at least my feet are now safe from acid attacks. edit: This is my 100th caption! __________________ Fenris Wolf Last edited by dancing spawn of ungoliant; 03-24-2006 at 09:32 AM.

03-24-2006, 06:29 PM	#10123
Gurthang Sword of Spirit Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Oh, I'm around. Posts: 1,507	Frodo found out the hard way that adding real vanilla to ice cream is not very tasty. __________________ I'm on a Mission from God.

03-24-2006, 08:03 PM	#10124
The Elf-warrior Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Virginia. Posts: 952	Butterbur: "Wanna hear some more knock-knock jokes?" Frodo: "No!" __________________ Fenris Wolf: WW LXXX.

03-24-2006, 08:14 PM	#10125
narfforc Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Muddy-earth Posts: 1,307	Things paint what they used to be Frodo to Barliman: What are you grinning about? Barliman: It's painted on this way, but if it wasn't I'd still have a good laugh at your big hairy feet, and that wig you've got on. __________________ [B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER.

03-24-2006, 11:49 PM	#10126
Formendacil Dead Serious Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Perched on Thangorodrim's towers. Posts: 3,347	The animated version of Gollum was too fat, with too much hair, and wore clothes, but the animators had been spot on with the greedy and fey look in his eyes. __________________ I prefer history, true or feigned.

03-25-2006, 12:44 AM	#10127
mormegil Maundering Mage Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 4,679	Barliman: What do you mean I look like a pervert. __________________ When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. -- P. J. O'Rourke

03-25-2006, 02:05 AM	#10128
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 6,153	Frodo: Oh no! He's after the Ring! Barliman: No, I'm after your money! OR Barliman: Oh what big feet you have. Frodo: All the better to kick you with. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

03-25-2006, 03:17 AM	#10129
narfforc Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Muddy-earth Posts: 1,307	Frodo: Who's that strange fellow with a skirt on? Barliman: Oh, he's one of them Strangers of the North, we call him Strides-less on account of him having no trousers. (Sorry for the colloquialism, strides=trousers) __________________ [B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER.

03-25-2006, 03:21 AM	#10130
Lalwendë A Mere Boggart Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: under the bed Posts: 4,814	Frodo: "I never expected to meet Les Dawson in the Prancing Pony! Got any good mother in law jokes?" __________________ Gordon's alive!

03-25-2006, 04:08 AM	#10131
Holbytlass Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2003 Location: The Party Tree Posts: 1,096	Butterbur: "Now what have you been doing, Mr. Underhill? Frightening my customers and spitting on my floor!" __________________ Holby is an actual flesh-and-blood person, right? Not, say a sock-puppet of Nilp’s, by any chance? ~Nerwen, WWCIII

03-25-2006, 04:48 AM	#10132
Nilpaurion Felagund Scion of The Faithful Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines] Posts: 5,430	Grins. Butterbur: How do you like my new dentures? __________________ フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo) The plot, cut, defeated. I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...

03-25-2006, 02:31 PM	#10134
Meela Denethor's True Love Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Mirkwood. With Thranduil... swoon Posts: 2,118	Suitably inspired by Barliman's manic grin and the giant open oven in the background Butterbur: This way sir, let me show you to the oven- er, room.. will you be stewing with- I mean, staying with us long? Frodo: Um, maybe we should leave, Sam.... Sam? Man in corner eating: Mmmm, tater seasoning... __________________ 'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age? 2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard.

03-25-2006, 03:32 PM	#10135
mormegil Maundering Mage Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 4,679	Barliman: Ohhh you're cute!!! Frodo: __________________ When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. -- P. J. O'Rourke

03-25-2006, 03:49 PM	#10136
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 6,153	Butterbur: For the last time, Mr. Underhill, I can't get the white wine any whiter! Frodo: Try putting some more milk in it... OR Butterbur: Wednesday night is give me all your money night! If you don't join in, you get thrown tot he Black Riders! __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

03-25-2006, 04:24 PM	#10137
Alcarillo Shadow of the Past Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Minas Mor-go Posts: 1,032	As a child, Butterbur didn't believe his mother when she told him his face would get stuck making faces like that.

03-25-2006, 04:35 PM	#10138
Kuruharan Regal Dwarven Shade Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold Posts: 3,685	Butterbur just couldn't resist sticking a whoopee cushion in Frodo's chair. __________________ ...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no...

03-25-2006, 06:26 PM	#10139
The Only Real Estel Raffish Rapscallion Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-( Posts: 3,025	Some are blessed with exceptional looks. Some are blessed with great intelligence. Some are blessed with both. Butterbur was blessed with neither.

03-25-2006, 08:11 PM	#10140
narfforc Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Muddy-earth Posts: 1,307	Don't make a song a dance about it................. Barman Butterball: Right Mister Undersized, the karaoke starts in five minutes, your on after Legless Greenteeth and the Six Pistelves, Oh and don't sing any songs by Elvish Parsley, because Strides-less thinks he's The King. __________________ [B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER.

03-25-2006, 09:10 PM	#10141
Holbytlass Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2003 Location: The Party Tree Posts: 1,096	Butterbur: You'd look like this, too, if a bee stung your cheek! __________________ Holby is an actual flesh-and-blood person, right? Not, say a sock-puppet of Nilp’s, by any chance? ~Nerwen, WWCIII

03-26-2006, 12:01 AM	#10142
Maeggaladiel Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: The end of the world as we know it. I feel fine, incidentally. Posts: 512	Frodo: AAHH!! It's that evil woman from The Goonies! __________________ "Wide ne bith wel," cwaeth se the geheirde on helle hriman.

03-26-2006, 02:27 AM	#10143
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 6,153	Butterbur: So, do you think I'll get that page three-newspaper photo shoot? Frodo: Erm... of course... to Sam Lets get out of here! __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

03-26-2006, 12:20 PM	#10144
Gurthang Sword of Spirit Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Oh, I'm around. Posts: 1,507	Frodo can't understand why Butterbur has his hair dyed two colors at once. OR Butterbur: "And I thought elves had pointy ears!" __________________ I'm on a Mission from God.

03-26-2006, 02:47 PM	#10145
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 6,153	Butterbur: Ale? Toast? Frodo: Actually, I'd like the new picture, please. After Denethor found his pet Olyphant dead, Pippin had some explaining to do... Pippin: I swear! I didn't do it! It was like that when I found it! OR Pippin: Merry! We've got our ears stuck together! OR even! Pippin: Merry! There's a giant Olyphant in the bath! Merry: You don't say? __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

03-26-2006, 02:52 PM	#10146
Formendacil Dead Serious Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Perched on Thangorodrim's towers. Posts: 3,347	Harry Potter catches sight of Merry and Pippin through his invisibility cloak. (Doesn't that crinklely quality speak to an Invisibility Cloak?) OH!!! WAIT!!!! Merry and Pippin catch sight of Gandalf... wearing an invisible cloak! __________________ I prefer history, true or feigned.

03-26-2006, 03:53 PM	#10147
Farael Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: In hospitals, call rooms and (rarely) my apartment. Posts: 1,549	Aragorn thought it'd be funny to throw a blanket over his head and pretend to be a ghost. After having seen some true ghosts during the battle, the joke did not go down very well with the hobbits. __________________ I prepared Explosive Runes this morning.

03-26-2006, 05:02 PM	#10148
narfforc Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Muddy-earth Posts: 1,307	Pippin; Ha-ha Merry, how did you manage to kill that Oliphaunt with only that salami saugage your trying to hide from me. __________________ [B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER.

03-26-2006, 05:53 PM	#10149
Kitanna Child of the West Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Watching President Fillmore ride a unicorn Posts: 2,390	The Hobbits are terrified to learn there really is such thing as an elephant graveyard. or The true terror of crazy glue. Pippin: Stop pulling! You're going to rip off my ear! __________________ "Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry." - Mark Twain

03-26-2006, 07:44 PM	#10150
Oddwen Drummer in the Deep Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Next Sunday A.D. Posts: 2,246	Pippin: Hi folks, I'm Peregrin Took, and this is my dummy Merry. Say Hello Merry! Pippin in a high voice: Hello folks! Pippin: Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week everyone! __________________ But all the while I sit and think of times there were before I listen for returning feet and voices at the door

03-26-2006, 08:56 PM	#10151
Parmastahir Wight Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Green Hill Country Posts: 196	Merry: "You killed it. You cook it!" Pippin: "WAAAAAHHHH!!!" __________________ Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them? Then do not be too eager to deal out death in judgement. For even the very wise can not see all ends.

03-26-2006, 11:49 PM	#10152
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 6,153	Pippin: Merry, The Olyphant took the top bunk! OR Merry: My mobile phone is vibrating... I know it's inside this armour somewhere... Pippin: You just don't want to talk to me! Merry: ... Erm... no comment. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

03-26-2006, 11:55 PM	#10153
Kuruharan Regal Dwarven Shade Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: A Remote Dwarven Hold Posts: 3,685	Merry: Look at the size of that footprint!! What could have caused it?! Pippin: Hold me Merry, I’m scared!!! __________________ ...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no...

03-27-2006, 12:45 AM	#10154
mormegil Maundering Mage Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 4,679	Merry doesn't quite know how best to help his friend in this situation Pippin: Merry, HELP ME!!! That wedgie the orc gave me really, really hurts!!! __________________ When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. -- P. J. O'Rourke

03-27-2006, 02:33 AM	#10155
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 6,153	Pippin: Merry is dead! Merry: No I'm not! Pippin: I can still hear his voice! OR Merry: What caused all this devastation? Pippin: Gandalf the grey un- Merry: DON'T SAY IT! __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

03-27-2006, 08:30 AM	#10156
Morsul the Dark Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2004 Posts: 3,502	Sort of inspired by Hookbill's "merry's dead" joke reminded me of monty python holy grail Pippin: look a swallow carrying a cocoanut! Merry:dont be crazy thats impossible Pippin:Ghosts just killed these oliphant your going to tell me a swallow cant carry a cocoanut?? Merry:That depends was it an Ergion Swallow or a Haradian Swallow, im just swaying its a matter of weight ratio.... __________________ Morsul the Resurrected

03-27-2006, 01:18 PM	#10157
Meela Denethor's True Love Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Mirkwood. With Thranduil... swoon Posts: 2,118	Merry: What are you crying about now? Pippin: The oliphaunt landed on my foot! __________________ 'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age? 2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard.