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Old 05-02-2006, 07:57 AM   #10561
Hama Of The Riddermark
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Hama Of The Riddermark has just left Hobbiton.


The mouth of Sauron, unable to see because of his helmet, was in fact showing the mithril coat of Frodo to a large rock.
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Old 05-02-2006, 08:11 AM   #10562
narfforc
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narfforc has been trapped in the Barrow!
The Mouth of Sauron: Psst keep it quiet, I am willing to defect to Minas Tirith, but only if you have an NHS dentist without a waiting list
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[B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER.
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Old 05-02-2006, 08:32 AM   #10563
Kath
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Kath is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Kath is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Kath is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
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The newest awareness poster for what happens when you don't brush your teeth:

Mouth of Sauron: Look kids, you could be like me!
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Old 05-02-2006, 08:51 AM   #10564
Gurthang
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And some kids still won't believe their mothers when they say 'Your face will stick like that!'

OR

A toothpaste commercial gone bad.
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Old 05-02-2006, 08:56 AM   #10565
Hama Of The Riddermark
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When scurvy attacks...
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Old 05-02-2006, 09:12 AM   #10566
mormegil
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mormegil is a guest at the Prancing Pony.mormegil is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
The substitute teacher fell for the old 'thumb tack on the chair' gag.
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Old 05-02-2006, 10:10 AM   #10567
Meela
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White Tree

"I am smiling!"
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'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age?
2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard.

Last edited by Meela; 08-29-2006 at 05:44 PM.
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Old 05-02-2006, 12:12 PM   #10568
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up Oh the old jokes...

Mouth: I have a token I was bidden to show to thee, to thee in particular old grey beard. A court restriction on all uncloaking for the next five years!

OR

The Mouth of Sauron always wondered why he could never get a girlfriend. Perhaps it was the shoes... yeah, defiantly the shoes.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

Last edited by Hookbill the Goomba; 05-03-2006 at 01:33 AM.
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Old 05-02-2006, 12:27 PM   #10569
Eomer of the Rohirrim
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Eomer of the Rohirrim is a guest at the Prancing Pony.Eomer of the Rohirrim is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
Shield

And you thought your school photo was bad!

or

Don't play with lucite, kids.
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Old 05-02-2006, 01:09 PM   #10570
Kitanna
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Kitanna is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Kitanna is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
(the standard bad teeth joke)
The Mouth of Sauron made a name for himself after the Ring was destroyed by becoming the poster boy for gingivitis.
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Old 05-02-2006, 01:20 PM   #10571
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

This is why your parents always told you to fasten your seat belts.

OR

Mouth regretted betting an Orc that he would reach the ground first after jumping off the black gate face first.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 05-02-2006, 01:54 PM   #10572
dancing spawn of ungoliant
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The Mouth of Sauron realised that all these years he had worn his helmet backwards...

Mouth: So that's why I couldn't see!
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Old 05-02-2006, 02:05 PM   #10573
narfforc
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Smile

The Mouth sings Smile in the style of that great Dwarf crooner Not King Coal

Smile though face is breaking
Smile though crowns are flaking
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Old 05-02-2006, 04:03 PM   #10574
The Only Real Estel
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Pipe

Now you know why Black Riders typically wear their hoods over their faces...
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Old 05-02-2006, 04:36 PM   #10575
Farael
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Aragorn(off screen): Say Cheeeeese!!
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Old 05-02-2006, 04:37 PM   #10576
The Only Real Estel
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Pipe

Mouth of Sauron: "What do you mean maybe we should make my helmet a little more protective? Half my face is covered up already, if we add any more they may not be able to see me at all!!"

Head Mordor Promotion Representative: "Uh...yes. That's the idea, sir."
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Old 05-02-2006, 07:09 PM   #10577
Nilpaurion Felagund
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Tolkien The horror!

Aragorn, after seeing Gandalf the Grey uncloaked.
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The plot, cut, defeated.
I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...
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Old 05-02-2006, 07:38 PM   #10578
Eonwe
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Silmaril

Contrairy to everyone's advice, the Mouth of Sauron was convinced he had a winning smile to match his winning personality.

-OR-

MoS: Quit shining that flash light on my teeth! They're bad enough as it is!
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Archery on Thursday,
Dancing on a Friday night!
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Old 05-02-2006, 08:03 PM   #10579
Elu Ancalime
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That's actually Gollum in a Hannibal Lector-style containment/constrainment during his stay with the Wood Elves.
________
Volcano vaporizer reviews

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Old 05-02-2006, 11:33 PM   #10580
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Mouth: What can I say? Mordor snack machines are cheap.

OR

Mouth: I am the mouth of Sauron. But I'm just waiting for the arm and hands to take a look at my teeth.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 05-03-2006, 05:44 AM   #10581
Parmastahir
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Parmastahir has just left Hobbiton.
Let's Make a Deal

"Look, I'll trade this mithril coat for some Longbottom Leaf. The chew we have in Mordor isn't fit for orcs!"
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Old 05-03-2006, 11:26 AM   #10582
Oddwen
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Oddwen is a guest of Elrond in Rivendell.Oddwen is a guest of Elrond in Rivendell.Oddwen is a guest of Elrond in Rivendell.
MoS: You made me love you, I didn't wanna do it, I didn't wanna do it...

Or...

MoS: You mean they can't look at my teeth? Inconceiveable!

Or...

MoS: ...and I don't even exercise!

Or...

The replies to the Mouth's personal ad dwindled to nought when he added his picture. He wondered why.

Or...

The final day in the Village - in triumph, the last Wolf morphs and prepares to attack the last Villager!

Or...

Luthien: Mother, this is the man I want to marry!
MoS: Hello, Mrs. Greycloak!
Melian: AAAAAIIIIII!!!

Or...

The Flying Nun?!?

Or...

Mother Superior jumped the gun...
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I listen for returning feet and voices at the door


Last edited by Oddwen; 05-03-2006 at 11:29 AM.
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Old 05-03-2006, 01:00 PM   #10583
Boromir88
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Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.
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White Tree

MoS: No I am not Darth Vader! Stop asking me!

OR

Public Service Announcement: This is what would happen to Boromir88 if you do not read through the entire thread.
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Old 05-03-2006, 01:08 PM   #10584
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Those pesky Orcs had swapped Mouth's toothpaste for glue again.

OR

And he wondered what went so wrong at the job interview.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 05-03-2006, 05:03 PM   #10585
THE Ka
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Not even the Mouth of Sauron was spared by the yearbook photographer...

~ Aesthete
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Hevur tú reikað líka sum eg,
í endaleysu tokuni?
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Old 05-04-2006, 01:30 PM   #10586
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up Going with the helmet joke...

The Mouth of Sauron had his helmet ‘uncloak proof’. Gandalf could get frostbite as far as he was concerned.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 05-04-2006, 01:57 PM   #10587
Bêthberry
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Bêthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.Bêthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.Bêthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.Bêthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.
1420!

Some people, no matter who they are, just hate getting a needle.
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Old 05-04-2006, 04:16 PM   #10588
The Only Real Estel
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Pipe

Mouth: "What do you mean I look like Gilbert Gottfried?"
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Old 05-04-2006, 04:38 PM   #10589
Gurthang
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Gurthang has just left Hobbiton.
Mouth of Sauron: "So, mom... dad... What do you think of my new nosering? Do you think it's too big?"

OR

The Mouth of Sauron suddenly realized that he should not have gone with the 'budget' golden teeth.

OR

The Mouth of Sauron thinks he's got some nice grillz.
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Old 05-04-2006, 06:29 PM   #10590
The Elf-warrior
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Haradrim chewing tobacco: Breakfast of champions.
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Old 05-04-2006, 11:43 PM   #10591
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Quote:
The Mouth of Sauron suddenly realized that he should not have gone with the 'budget' golden teeth.
Mouth: I knew I shouldn't have gone with the budget eye care.

OR

Gandalf gets a horrible vision of what the future could be like if he continued to smoke.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 05-05-2006, 04:14 AM   #10592
Boromir88
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Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.
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White Tree

Hookbill has gotten me to think of something:

The MoS is the first patient in Middle-earth's break through laser eye surgery...
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Old 05-05-2006, 12:14 PM   #10593
Beanamir of Gondor
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Eye

Mouth of Sauron: Awww, Aragorn, you bought me a bouquet of athelas!

(dunno, that's what it looks like to me)
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Old 05-05-2006, 02:35 PM   #10594
narfforc
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narfforc has been trapped in the Barrow!
Phew what a stink

The words Cheesy Grin refer to the smell and not the look
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Old 05-05-2006, 03:15 PM   #10595
Anguirel
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A Profound Philosophic Dialogue

DIAMOND: I'm afraid the Wolves win.

MOUTH OF SAURON: What?! But I killed the last werewolf fair and square...

DIAMOND: Not exactly. You see, there were three extra Cobblers, an Owl, a Pussycat and a secret Cursed Villager.

ELEMPI: Not to mention the Duelling Wizards who transformed you into a Black Beorning.

MOUTH OF SAURON: Argh! And people wonder why I forget my own name! Curse this game and its cruel contortions!
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Old 05-05-2006, 06:08 PM   #10596
Boromir88
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Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.
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White Tree

Mouth of Sauron: I have a message from my master I was bidden to tell thee...

Aragorn: Yeah we know, get on with it, so I can chop off your head.

Mouth of Sauron: No! It's a new pic!



Gimli surely didn't expect dwarf women to look like this...
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Old 05-06-2006, 12:37 AM   #10597
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

While everyone else stares in horror at Gandalf's cloak-less nature, Pippin says, "Seen it before." and goes back to sleep.

OR

Gimli: Moria!

Legolas: Moria!

Pippin: It's only a model.

Boromir: Shhh!
__________________
I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 05-06-2006, 03:36 AM   #10598
narfforc
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narfforc has been trapped in the Barrow!
MoS: I am The Mouthpiece Of Sourone, The Dork-Lord of Bad-Odour and The Lord of the Grins.

(Rearrange Rings=Grins)
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Old 05-06-2006, 07:25 AM   #10599
Kath
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Kath is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Kath is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Kath is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
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Merry stared on in fascination as Gimli began to glow.
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Old 05-06-2006, 08:26 AM   #10600
narfforc
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narfforc has been trapped in the Barrow!
I can do anything better than you, no you can't, yes I can

In the annual 'I can shoot an arrow further than you can throw an axe contest', Gimli tells Legolas that the elf has won, so he can tell the big fellow with a fiery temper why he's disturbed him
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