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Old 02-13-2007, 11:36 AM   #281
Lalwendë
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Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Thumbs up

And PC davem has got his job back. Will we get to see him posing around in his police hat again, the one that made him look like an extra in the Full Monty?
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Old 02-13-2007, 11:40 AM   #282
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lalwendë
And PC davem has got his job back. Will we get to see him posing around in his police hat again, the one that made him look like an extra in the Full Monty?
I assure you he will be making an appearance in an upcoming front page.
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THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 02-13-2007, 11:46 AM   #283
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Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Thumbs up

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hookbill the Goomba
I assure you he will be making an appearance in an upcoming front page.
Haha! Excellent!

I think someone should open a Barrow-downs chippy and use the few unsold copies of the Downer to wrap the customers' chips and fish up in so they get a good read while they eat!
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Old 02-15-2007, 08:18 AM   #284
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gil-Galad
i thought it was a turtle.. .but now its a penguin... meh...

Penguin - Turtle, Potato - Potato
Serious Cat's father has something to say about this...



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THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 02-17-2007, 06:47 PM   #285
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Quote:
Serious Cat's father has something to say about this...
What a noble cat... Then again, cats make any sense of undeserved self-acomplishment look regal. I'm indeed impressed.

Sauron has a vacation house of chocolate? Did he buy and register a building permit in Candyland or something?

The downs could form one of those really pesky, but highly organized homeowner's associations, you know, architects and contractors' headaches...

*hides copy of Architecture Digest*


~ Ka
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Old 02-19-2007, 02:34 AM   #286
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up Olden Times...

Unfortunately, there was no News this week. So, I had a look through The Downer's archives and found this long lost edition from many, many years ago. Enjoy!



It even comes with the whimsical adventures of Sir Phantom and Master Alan...



Even Serious Cat was around in those days...

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Old 02-19-2007, 06:53 AM   #287
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Thumbs up

Ye jolly good ol' times!
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Old 02-19-2007, 09:09 AM   #288
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Thinlómien is wading through the Dead Marshes.Thinlómien is wading through the Dead Marshes.Thinlómien is wading through the Dead Marshes.Thinlómien is wading through the Dead Marshes.Thinlómien is wading through the Dead Marshes.Thinlómien is wading through the Dead Marshes.
Poor Serious Cat! That moustache is horrible.
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Old 02-19-2007, 09:27 AM   #289
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Quote:
Originally Posted by Thinlómien
Poor Serious Cat! That moustache is horrible.
Really? I thought it quite honourable.
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Old 02-19-2007, 11:21 AM   #290
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The Might is a guest at the Prancing Pony.The Might is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
So did I...serious cat looks great
Anyway...interesting idea with the Downer this week...
Perhaps a retro cartoon of Phantom and Alien follows...
I could imagine Alien smoking a pipe and asking a butler to bring him some tea
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Old 02-22-2007, 11:23 AM   #291
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What a dandy cat!

No wag of my finger, but a sure tip of my hat to that striking show.

~ Aesthete Ka
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Old 02-23-2007, 02:49 PM   #292
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Might
I could imagine Alien smoking a pipe and asking a butler to bring him some tea


Hope you liked that.
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Old 02-23-2007, 02:57 PM   #293
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Last edited by Volo; 02-23-2007 at 03:00 PM.
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Old 02-23-2007, 04:09 PM   #294
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Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
What's Serious Cat been up to there? Did he go on a rampage, destroying everything because he got Tesco Value Meat instead of Sheba?
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Old 02-25-2007, 02:25 PM   #295
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exactly what I had in mind!
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Old 02-26-2007, 02:29 AM   #296
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
As Promised, Lal, this week, Davem is in the News...



This week, The Phantom has a brother. Will he ever appear again? Only time will tell.

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Old 02-26-2007, 07:51 AM   #297
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Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Thumbs up

Ooh, I was late reading the paper today because I've been trying to keep up with what's been happening up my road because someone got shot last night! And I heard it all and thought it was fireworks! So I've been being like a real life DCI Lalwende...


It's that bit about davem being 'roped in to it by strange forces' that rings most true. He often blames things on this, such as not doing his ironing etc.

I'll leave it there before he sees this and gets sarcastic on me...

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Old 02-26-2007, 08:29 AM   #298
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Does davem read The Downer? Or is it too High Brow?
Or maybe he just does not like Alien...



Anyway, people, if you have any stories you'd like on the front page, just PM them to me (because I am falling behind at the moment). I'm thinking of doing a competition soon where I'll post an amusing picture and the one who can make the best story for it will not only get on the Front Page, but win... I don't know... some grass.
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Last edited by Hookbill the Goomba; 03-01-2007 at 05:29 AM.
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Old 02-26-2007, 05:07 PM   #299
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Boots Random Titles want some mud....

Hm...I wonder if Bob the Liar is really credible....

And is the Eye of Sauron allergic to muffins? That'd be a terrible allergy to have.


Lastly, you should probably give away mud instead of grass, mud's more legal in these parts.
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Old 02-26-2007, 05:24 PM   #300
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Quote:
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Lastly, you should probably give away mud instead of grass, mud's more legal in these parts.
Nahh. I'd rather have the grass, it makes your barrow look all nice and grown-over. It attracts more feckless hobbits that way.
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Old 02-28-2007, 10:45 AM   #301
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Oddwen
Nahh. I'd rather have the grass, it makes your barrow look all nice and grown-over. It attracts more feckless hobbits that way.
Quite indeed. Also, to add a topping of spare mushrooms here and there to sod is quite effective as well, I've found.
Some floral arrangements are 'meh' at best, the mushrooms are the way to go.

~ Ka, Aesthete again
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Old 03-01-2007, 05:28 AM   #302
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
My lap top died yesterday and I have been frantically trying to extract the upcoming Downer weeks off the fried hard drive.

So, several things may happen,

Firstly, I may recover the files and we'll be okay, or there will be no Downer next week or, if there is, the style and content will probably be different. Mainly because I will have to start from scratch instead of using the template I made.

Let us hope that I can get the data out. Although, I suspect I know who the culprit is...

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Old 03-01-2007, 06:12 AM   #303
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hookbill the Goomba
Does davem read The Downer? Or is it too High Brow?
Or maybe he just does not like Alien...


I just hope you do not have sinister *sage-like abilities....



*note, not the garden herb which goes so well with onions in stuffing, but the kind of 'sage' like scary Mother Shipton or Nostradamus. I am not suggesting that you, Hookbill. are green and live in the garden...

BTW davem's mac is playing up and my laptop keeps overheating so I know how you feel.
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Old 03-02-2007, 03:19 PM   #304
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Pipe

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lalwendë
I am not suggesting that you, Hookbill. are green and live in the garden...
Like, The Jack in the Green?

As some of you may be aware, my beloved laptop sadly passed away yesterday.
Unfortunately, I am, for now, without Microsoft Image composer, the program I use to make the newspapers and until I get it back I'm going to try some other methods but I cannot promise great quality in future papers.
Also, I'm thinking of hiring an assistant writer for the Paper. If anyone is interested, the job will entail writing one story a week of around 200-300 words and, if he or she likes, some of the little side headlines also.
If you're interested let me know. I need help because I've fallen a little behind with university work piling up and my computer problems.
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Old 03-05-2007, 02:14 AM   #305
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Well, here is the News... Happy now?



It's interesting that I made this Phantom and Alien just before my computer died...

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Old 03-05-2007, 05:59 AM   #306
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Legate of Amon Lanc is spying on the Black Gate.Legate of Amon Lanc is spying on the Black Gate.Legate of Amon Lanc is spying on the Black Gate.Legate of Amon Lanc is spying on the Black Gate.Legate of Amon Lanc is spying on the Black Gate.Legate of Amon Lanc is spying on the Black Gate.
Thumbs up

Seems like a little prophecy from the Alien, doesn't it?

However I am happy that you managed to get the Downer out despite all the problems! I would certainly miss it!
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Old 03-05-2007, 02:53 PM   #307
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Legate of Amon Lanc
Seems like a little prophecy from the Alien, doesn't it?
Yes, it seems I may yet have 'sage-like' abilities after all!

So, Lal, Davem, you'd better keep an eye out for Alien coming near your house with a box of matches.
But, just in case this is true...



Lets hope that one comes true!
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Old 03-05-2007, 04:52 PM   #308
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Nice...interesting powers I guess, not exactly what I had expected
Btw, I wonder if the serious cat will ever make a guest star appearence...but on the other hand I fear that Alien would eat the jolly good cat
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Old 03-05-2007, 06:13 PM   #309
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Boots Random Titles take some time to think....

Hmm....I wonder where one buys a table player.
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Old 03-05-2007, 07:34 PM   #310
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I'm sure you can find a good turntable at any music store...
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Old 03-06-2007, 11:39 AM   #311
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Legate of Amon Lanc is spying on the Black Gate.Legate of Amon Lanc is spying on the Black Gate.Legate of Amon Lanc is spying on the Black Gate.Legate of Amon Lanc is spying on the Black Gate.Legate of Amon Lanc is spying on the Black Gate.Legate of Amon Lanc is spying on the Black Gate.
Quote:
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Btw, I wonder if the serious cat will ever make a guest star appearence...but on the other hand I fear that Alien would eat the jolly good cat
Don't be silly. She wouldn't let him.
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Old 03-06-2007, 11:44 AM   #312
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The Might is a guest at the Prancing Pony.The Might is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
Which brings me to a new question.
Is serious a she or a he???
I mean, considering the moustache I think it's pretty obvious it should be a he...but you never know
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Old 03-06-2007, 02:22 PM   #313
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Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Lots of cats have mysterious moustaches, both the hes and shes. It are actually quite disturbing how many kitties bear a resemblance to a certain dictator.

Of course, our Serious Cat are look more like a Lord Peter Wimsey type...good chap.
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Old 03-06-2007, 04:24 PM   #314
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hmm...a mystery
I just thought of serious cat with its old style look being worshiped by thousands of slaves in ancient Egypt, maybe even have its own pyramid...
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Old 03-06-2007, 04:38 PM   #315
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Hey the forum cat looks just my old one before it got run over, its cute but the serious cat, I know where Winston Churchill is knowadays, Oh but my old cat. Poor Ronnie why did you have to get run over?
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Old 03-06-2007, 06:50 PM   #316
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Let's cut the chat

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Old 03-06-2007, 08:49 PM   #317
Gil-Galad
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mormegil
Let's cut the chat

don't you mean let's cut the cat?


but yeah, i wonder if hookbill is ever going to compile all his phantom and the alien comics into one organized collection...
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Old 03-07-2007, 12:38 AM   #318
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gil-Galad
but yeah, i wonder if hookbill is ever going to compile all his phantom and the alien comics into one organized collection...
It's funny you should mention that. I did have that Idea but thought it would be pointless... Mmmm... maybe not... *dreams*

Seriously, thought, does anyone want a job at The Downer?
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Old 03-07-2007, 06:26 AM   #319
Lalwendë
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Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gil-Galad
don't you mean let's cut the cat?
Maybe morm is warning us in Franglais?

the chat...le chat...the cat...

I'll get me coat...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hookbill
It's funny you should mention that. I did have that Idea but thought it would be pointless... Mmmm... maybe not... *dreams*
No Mr H of G, no dreams for you, you are scaring me with your sage like abilities. Just step back away from the cheese...

Anyway, what you are looking for is an Intern. A Deputy Editor. A Downer's Apprentice.

I might be able to come up with some amusing snippets for you if you promise not to go anywhere near the cheese at suppertime.
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Old 03-07-2007, 03:02 PM   #320
Durelin
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Durelin is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Durelin is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
It seems our very own Fordim Hedgthistle made an appearance in many newspapers across the US today, in this lovely little comic.

And it appears serious cat is not alone as an animal resident of the 'Downs... His far less sophisticated cousin seems to have caught the addiction, as well, perhaps adding to his...bad habits.




And of course one of the longest dead residents of the 'Downs...

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