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Old 11-18-2003, 09:28 PM   #281
Meneltarmacil
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Quote:
(The HOly Grail.. couldnt resist.. someone's probably already been there thought...)
This happens to be the second time somebody's repeated my idea... I don't mind, though.
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Old 11-20-2003, 02:48 AM   #282
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Silmaril

*bows* i am ashamed...

Legolas: Three hundred against ten thousand? They will all die.

Aragorn: Well, actually, there are two hundred... Not as smart as you thought you were are you elf?

Legolas: I should slap you for that!

Aragorn: Go ahead pansy!
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Old 11-20-2003, 11:34 AM   #283
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This one came to me during watching Are You Being Served.

Aragorn looks for the rope to pull him and Gimli away at Helm's Deep. Suddenly, Legolas jumps onto the wall above their heads.

Legolas: I'm free! *Throws rope over, with measuring tape tied to the end*
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Old 11-20-2003, 07:31 PM   #284
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Aragorn: Legolas! Bring him down!
Legolas: I've played college football...I can take you down...*jumps towards the torch-bearer*
Aragorn: No! Not that way!

FOOOOOM!!!!!

Later days! [img]smilies/cool.gif[/img]
->Elenrod

P.S. I just love that picture. Maybe it's my morbid fascination with nuclear weapons and SS-18s...

[ November 20, 2003: Message edited by: Nilpaurion Felagund ]
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Old 11-20-2003, 09:01 PM   #285
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Silmaril

Quote:
(BTW-Elennar, I love your new sig! It would be really funny to say that to somebody sometime and see their reaction)
Yes, it is fun. I have done it!


Aragorn: *yells* Bado orch echado meleth!

Elves: OK, if you say so! *they do as he says*

Aragorn: What are you doing?

Random Elf #1: You told us to.

Aragorn: No I didn't, I told you to shoot!

Random Elf #2: You need to study your elvish, you said, 'Go kiss an orc.'

Aragorn: No way! *flips through Elvish-English dictionary* Woh, you're right! Sorry, guys! Ok, lets try this again...

Yes, I know something similar has been done before (Aragorn accidentally telling them to dance the polka in their underwear), sorry, it's all I can think of right now. [img]smilies/confused.gif[/img] I think it's a funny idea, Aragorn saying the wrong thing. Whoever came up with the original should get an award.
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Old 11-21-2003, 04:50 AM   #286
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*gives a Blooper award for the original*
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'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age?
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Old 11-21-2003, 11:46 AM   #287
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Quote:
This happens to be the second time somebody's repeated my idea... I don't mind, though.
Only the second?

Lindril (short sharp shocked) Arvilya
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Old 11-22-2003, 09:38 AM   #288
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Legolas: Final tally, 42! *strokes his bow*

Gimli: Not bad, for an Elvish princeling. I, myself, am sitting on a pretty 43.

*Legolas shoots the Orc that Gimli's sitting on, and the arrow hits him in a rather sensitive part*

Gimli: EEEEEEEEEP!!!!!!!!

Legolas: *runs away as fast as his Elven legs can carry him*

*Cut to a shot of the horizon. Legolas is running away as fast as he can, and Gimli is chasing him wearing a diaper-like bandage, waving his axe, and yelling choice curse words in Khuzdul*

Sorry for mental pictures! I got the idea from the TTT EE that I was watching last night.
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Old 11-22-2003, 05:18 PM   #289
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Finwe!! That was hilarious! The last mental image was hilarious! *dies of laughter-- again*
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Old 11-22-2003, 09:12 PM   #290
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(This is kind of from the book, but oh well...)

Legolas: And has anyone seem Gimli?
Aragorn: Last I saw, he was being swept towards the caves with Eomer.
Legolas: Alas, for I much wished to tell him that I saved a bunch of money with Geiko insurance!


Or...
Legolas: Has anyone seen Gimli?
Aragorn: Last I saw, he was being swept towards the caves with Eomer.
Legolas: Rats! Lost another loan to Ditech!

Or...


Legolas: Has anyone seen Gimli?
Aragorn: Last I saw, he was being swept towards the caves with Eomer.
Gamling: That could get nasty! I hope he has that insurance!
Legolas: What insurance?
Duck: Aflac!
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Old 11-26-2003, 08:52 PM   #291
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I watched TTT again yesterday, and came up with these...

Grima: They will have women...
Saruman: *no reaction*
Grima: ...and children.
Saruman: *raises eyebrows*
Grima: Are you a pervy child-fancier?

----------

Aragorn: Gondor will answer!
Theoden: Gondor? Where was Gondor when the Westfold fell? Where was Gondor when our enemies closed in around us? *bleep* Gondor! Oops, sorry.
(Got that one when the sound malfunctioned for a second during the last sentence)

----------

Legolas: Look at them. They are frightened. I can see it in their eyes.
All: What did you say, pretty-boy?
*hapless mutilation ensues*

Later days! [img]smilies/cool.gif[/img]
->Elenrod
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Old 11-26-2003, 09:24 PM   #292
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Thumbs up

The fellowship( Minus Gandalf) is stuck in a very dangerous situation. They must learn the lesson of not being seen.

Narrator: Here, we see Mr. Merry Brandybuck of Brandybuck Hall, the shire. Merry Brandy buck as you can clearly see cannot be seen. He shall demonstate the lesson of not being seen.

Narrator: Mr. Merry would you stand up please...

We then see Merry stand up from behind a bush in the middle of a field. Then without warning. BOOM! Merry is blown up!

Merry: AHHHHHHHHHH!

Narrator: As you can see mr. Merry has not learned the first lesson of not being seen.

This one's my favorite..heh heh. [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]

We can see a field much like that of the one where merry was in . With only one bush.

Narrator: Here we have Mr. Aragorn of Rivendale, Middle earth. Mr. Aragorn cannot be seen. Let us see how he shows the proper way of not being seen.

Narrator: Mr. Aragorn, would you stand up please.

a long moment of silence then it is broken by the narrator. Aragorn does not stand up.

Narrator: Mr. Aragorn has learned the first lesson of not being seen. Do not stand up. But, he has chosen a very obvious place to hide.

The one bush in the one field has blown up.

Aragorn: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

I'll just let you guess which monty python movie this is.



Quote:
"I don't wanna talk to you a no more, you silly englishman!" "Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elder berries!"
- Monty Python's Flying Circus, Monty Python in search of The Holy Grail
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Old 11-26-2003, 09:24 PM   #293
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Oh, wait...there's more.

From RotK...

Aragorn: A day may come...
when the courage of men fails...
when we forsake our friends...
and break all bonds of friendship.
But it is not this day.
This day...we fight!
*cricket background*
Aragorn: OK, then. This day, we run! Wait for me!

----------

Back to TTT...

Frodo: The Ring will not save Gondor! It has only the power to destroy. Please, (deep voice) LET MY PEOPLE GO.
Faramir: Or else...
*Frodo takes the Ring, and dips it into Anduin, which immediately turns to blood*
FAramir: Oh, my Eru...OK, you can go now. Toodles! *dashes off as fast as his legs could*

-----------

Aragorn: It is an army bred for a single purpose...
*Theoden approaches*
Aragorn: ...to play darn good hopscotch.
Theoden: My Eru...

Later days! [img]smilies/cool.gif[/img]
->Elenrod

[ 4:09 AM November 27, 2003: Message edited by: Nilpaurion Felagund ]
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Old 11-28-2003, 10:10 AM   #294
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Sting

I was watching TTT the other day...

__________________________________________

At Helm's Deep, Gandalf appears on the hill with Eomer and the Rohirrim behind him. He starts riding down the hill, Shadowfax trips and starts rolling down the hill with Gandalf. The Rohirrim stumble over him and they all end up rolling down the hill.

__________________________________________

Frodo: What are we holding onto, Sam?
Sam: Your trousers, Mr Frodo, I think Stinker stole your belt!
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Old 11-28-2003, 10:37 AM   #295
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Sting

The Ka, you are brilliant. Why do people only choose to use Holy Grail references when there are so many good Flying Circus ones?

And sorry for stealing yours, Nilpaurion Felagund, but it could only remind me of one thing (er, besides Michael Jackson)...


Grima: They will have women...
Saruman: *no reaction*
Grima: ...and children...
Saruman: *no reaction*
Grima: ...and there may be some hobbits.
Saruman: *eyebrows raise* Well, let's get going then! *saunters out*
Grima: *shudders* And I thought I was creepy... pervy hobbit-fancier.
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Old 11-28-2003, 01:21 PM   #296
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Teehee! [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]
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Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
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Old 11-30-2003, 09:35 PM   #297
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Quote:
(er, besides Michael Jackson)...
Who knows...they might be one and the same... [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
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Old 12-04-2003, 07:14 PM   #298
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Helm's Deep..

Aragorn: I'm too sexy for my sword..

Legolas: I'm too sexy for my bow..

Gimli: You know what this dwarf says to that? I'm too sexy for.. for.. Oh, dammit all..

(was I allowed to type that? poor Gimli!)
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Old 12-04-2003, 08:02 PM   #299
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Pippin: But were Hobbits! Halflings! Shire-folk!
Treebeard: Maybe you are, and maybe you aren't. The White Wizard will know.
Merry: The White Wizard?
Pippin: Alatar!
Gandalf: No, you foolofaTook! It's me!
Pippin: I thought you were grey.

Later days! [img]smilies/cool.gif[/img]
->Elenrod
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Old 12-04-2003, 08:29 PM   #300
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Battle of Helm's Deep:
The Uruk's are marching and they get to where they're supposed to stop, and Aragorn pulls out a Capital One No Hassle Card instead of his sword, then one by one all the Elves and men (and Gimli)pull their's out, and all the orcs moan [img]smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img] and turn around and march angrily away. The leader says, "What's in YOUR wallet?!?" as he steps down off of the rock he was standing on.
My friends and I thought it was funny, so I thought I would share it with you guys.
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Old 12-11-2003, 12:47 AM   #301
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Silmaril

Aragorn: She stays becuase she has hope.

Elrond: She stays becuase of you, she belongs with her people!

Aragorn: No, its the hope...

Elrond: No....

Aragorn: Yes...

*stare at eachother**

Aragorn: ouch! I knew that hard-browed stare would get me, So? Whats your point? Are you going to have me 'taken care of'

Elrond: All im saying is i wouldnt be walking down any dark alleys any time soon Estel.
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Old 12-11-2003, 01:00 AM   #302
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Silmaril

Gríma: So fair, yet so cold, like a morning of pale spring still clinging to winter's chill.
Éowyn: Youve been watching Bold and The Beautiful.
Gríma: How so?
Éowyn: Rydge just said that to Brooke on yesterdays episode.
Gríma [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]amn, i had hoped you diddnt see it!
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Old 12-12-2003, 02:22 AM   #303
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Warning: Just don't read it!!!

Théoden: So much death...what can man do against such reckless hate?
Aragorn: Ride out with me.
Théoden(turns to Aragorn): For the King of Rohan. For you.
Aragorn: Let us elope to the Undying Lands.
Théoden: I love you... *they kiss*

"Eeeew..." the crowds cried. They took the insolent writer and threw him into Mt. Doom.
"Noooo!!!" was Elenrod's last cry...
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Old 12-12-2003, 10:54 AM   #304
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Sting

*cough cough*
*gasp*
*tears*

And I thought the Aragorn picture was scary.... I'm scarred for life! *whimper*

Lindril (please make the pain go away) Arvilya
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Old 12-12-2003, 07:55 PM   #305
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Sting

*chokes on her left-over pumpkin pie and starts whimpering from the painful mental images*


Please don't do that! I think we should limit the amount of mental pictures in posts!
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Old 12-13-2003, 04:19 PM   #306
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I got this from MST3K:

Frodo: Aragorn! Aragorn!

Aragorn: I'm coming, you great cow!

(MST from Crash of Moons^ ^; )
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Old 12-13-2003, 05:30 PM   #307
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:: I thought this was rather funny for the mean people out there::

In the EE of the Fellowship, when they are leaving Rivendell and Frodo asks Gandalf which way Mordor is Gandalf says "right" Frodo walks to the right and keeps going. The rest of the Fellowship dies laughing on the left road.
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Old 12-14-2003, 07:55 PM   #308
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Quote:
Lindril (please make the pain go away) Arvilya
There is that memory thingy from MIB...but... [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img]

Quote:
I think we should limit the amount of mental pictures in posts!
WHAT?!?! And risk sanctions from the United Nations' Mental Images Institution?

I had no idea what I have done...

*whimpers away*
->Elenrod the outcast

P.S. Nice new avatar, Finwe! [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

<font size=1 color=339966>[ 1:04 AM December 15, 2003: Message edited by: Nilpaurion Felagund ]
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Old 12-15-2003, 01:22 PM   #309
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Sting

Quote:
Theoden: I love you...
*Splutters, sprays mouthful of coke over keyboard*
Yuckyuckyuckyuckyuckyuckyuckyuckyuckyuckyuck!
And double yuck!
Couple that with the Aragorn in a bikini pic...
Yuckyuckyuckyuckyuckyuckyuck...etc
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Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
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Old 12-15-2003, 03:12 PM   #310
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Sting

*SHRIIIIIEEEEEKKKK!!!!!!!!!* Geez, I thought this forum was supposed to have been censored a bit!! [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img]

Okay, how's about another CLEAN blooper?

*Council of Elrond*

Elrond: "The Ring must be destroyed."

Gimli: "Well, let's do it then!"

*brings axe down on Ring; axe blade breaks*

Elrond: "The only way that the Ring may be destroyed dwarf, is if it is dropped into the Ring of Fire on Mt. Wannahockaloogie."

Ahhhhhh, "Finding Nemo" provides plenty of good ideas.

(We is almost to our 100th post, precioussss!)
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Old 12-15-2003, 03:27 PM   #311
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Theoden:Where was Gondor when the Westfold fell?
cut to knights of gondor at a bar
knight of gondor:werent we supposed to be helping Rohan?

---------------------------------------------

Legolas: they will all die! Cast them all to Udun! DIE DIE DIE!
---------------------------------------------
Legolas pulls back to shoot his arrow when out jumps...
Gimli: BOO!

Legolas pokes himself with the back of his bow

Cool! I started page 9!

<font size=1 color=339966>[ 4:28 PM December 15, 2003: Message edited by: Arothir ]
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Old 12-16-2003, 02:54 AM   #312
Nilpaurion Felagund
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A lame sequel to a shocking revelation...

Arwen(bursts inside Hornburg): So, this is what happens behind my back!
Aragorn: Pookums, I can explain...
Arwen: Not you, Dûnadan. I was talking to Snoogie here. *points to Théoden*
Théoden: Woogie-woops, I'm sorry...

*slinks silently away*
-&gt;Elenrod: You'll never take me alive!
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The plot, cut, defeated.
I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...
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Old 12-16-2003, 10:43 AM   #313
Lindril Arvilya
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Sting

I'd say this is turning into a sordid love triangle, but really, it's a square.

Aragorn: *slumped on the steps outside, trying to ignore kissy noises from inside* I can't believe Arwen would cheat on me... *sniff sniff* *tries to take it like a man* *bursts into tears*
Eowyn: *thinks "Score! Here's my chance!"* Aragorn, my lord, what's wrong?
Aragorn: Arwen... cheated... on.... me!!!!!
Eowyn: Oh, you poor man, she doesn't deserve you! (Asks the fatal question) Who's the poor guy who has to put up with her for the rest of his life?
Aragorn: *pauses... can he do this?* Well, uh, er.... *thinks "She'll find out soon enough"* Uh... Haldir.
*smooch*
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Old 12-16-2003, 11:11 AM   #314
Feared Half-Elf
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Sting

Quote:
Uh...Haldir.
*snork*

I think it's just become a love pentagon!

Can't think of anything right now, sorry!
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Old 12-16-2003, 08:41 PM   #315
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Silmaril

Continuing that...

*Haldir walks in*

Haldir: I'm here, shnookums!

Arwen: *runs over to him*

Theoden: Wait! What about me?...

*Haldir begins to talk, but Arwen interrupts him*

Arwen: Well, you know, it never would have worked, you're a human, and as everyone knows, that means I'm just so much better than you.

Haldir: OK, everyone shut up. *pushes Arwen away* *to Theoden* You know I would never leave you.


[img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img]
Where did this come from???
*Elennar runs away to get nasty unpleasant thoughts out of her mind* OUTOUTOUTOUTOUT! NOW!
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Old 08-08-2005, 02:58 PM   #316
husborne
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Ring Things that never happend

Things that never happend

Things that never happend in the Lord of the Rings films.


Aragorn in mid-battle

"Everyone Stop Fighting, I've got a paper cut"



Add your funnyMissing scences


Have fun.




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own-middle-earth
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Old 11-13-2005, 12:40 AM   #317
The Elf-warrior
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Aragorn: "No news of Frodo?"

Gandalf: "Of course not."

Aragorn "We have time. Every day, Frodo moves closer to Mordor."

Gandalf: "How do we know that Frodo is alive? What are you, psychic or something?"

Aragorn: "Well, I have a measure of Elvish foresight. What does your heart tell you you?"

Gandalf: "Nothing. I would be very freaked out if I had a talking heart."
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Old 11-15-2005, 09:58 AM   #318
Morsul the Dark
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Saruman: You will taste men flesh!

Uruk-Hai #9942:Im a vegetarian!!!

Saruman:You will taste westfold grass

Uruk-Hai #9942:That'll do!
----------------------------------------------------

Dead King:That line has been broken
Aragorn:It was remade *slash go through king*....*slash slash slash* *gulp*
cut to Elrond
Elrond:where's my sword? why do I have narsil....Ohh sh........
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Old 11-16-2005, 01:03 AM   #319
The 1,000 Reader
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I found this one somewhere else. I can't remember where, though. Sorry if this is old.

(Gollum is dancing at the Crack of Doom.)

Sam: Why isn't he falling off like in the books?

Frodo: Well, it looks like I'll have to push him in.

Sam: Mr. Frodo, make it look like your fighting him for the Ring.

Frodo: Why?

Sam: For the audience, Mr. Frodo.

Frodo: Ah, yes. The audience. (Goes and fights Gollum.)
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