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Old 02-25-2006, 09:50 AM   #3241
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Fortunately, Johnny the Stinky Balrog swooped down (that's right, he's got wings) and swept Tom away.
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Old 02-25-2006, 09:52 AM   #3242
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Fortunately, hobbits share odd British-humor, and found the song delightful. They even did a little dance.
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Old 02-25-2006, 10:42 AM   #3243
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Eye

Unfortunately, Johnny the Stinky Balrog found out that he had wings but couldn't use them to fly since they were made of nothing but shadow, so he fell to the ground, crushing both himself and Tom.
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Old 02-25-2006, 01:16 PM   #3244
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Fortunately, Tom Bombadil was allright, since:
Quote:
None has ever caught him yet, for Tom, he is the master:
His songs are stronger songs, and his feet are faster.
And Goldberry and Tom had a delicious dinner of stinky balog.
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Old 02-25-2006, 02:01 PM   #3245
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Unfortunately, while Tom finished off his balog, the Balrog was still at large.
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Old 02-25-2006, 02:11 PM   #3246
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Fortunately, Tom got indegestion from eating Johnny the Stinky Balrog.
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Old 02-26-2006, 12:01 AM   #3247
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Fortunately, with a large chunk of it missing, the balrog bled to death.
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Old 02-26-2006, 12:31 AM   #3248
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Unfortunately, as history proves, Johnny can never die because he is so loveable, but not as loveable as his chum Gil-Galad
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Old 02-26-2006, 01:07 AM   #3249
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Fortunately Johnny the Stinky Balrog's chum Gil-Galad was nearby and gave Tom and Goldberry toothbrushes and a stern talking to for eatting such loveable and frightening creatures.
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Old 02-26-2006, 03:30 AM   #3250
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Thumbs up Unfortunately . . .

. . . Sauron came and laid the smackdown on Gil-Galad, End of the Second Age-style.
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Old 02-26-2006, 07:17 AM   #3251
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up Sorry, Nilp...

Fortunately, as you may know from the wishing thread, 'The smack down' is a form of toasted cheese. The only effect it had was that Gil-Galad had some 2nd age cheese in his hair. The smell was the worst thing.
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Old 02-26-2006, 11:34 AM   #3252
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Eye

Unfortunately (for Gil-Galad), the cheese attracted thousands of stinging insects from miles around.
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Old 02-26-2006, 11:45 AM   #3253
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Valesse has just left Hobbiton.
Fortunately he had purchased some Osgiliath Off: the very popular and effective pest spray.
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Old 02-26-2006, 12:05 PM   #3254
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Unfortunately, it was meant for Balrogs only and Gil inflated into a large balloon.
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Old 02-26-2006, 12:07 PM   #3255
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Fortunately, the insects went to Sauron instead. He ran with all speed to Mount Doom, but not fast enough.
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Old 02-26-2006, 03:37 PM   #3256
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Eye

Fortunately, the mountain drove up to him, meeting him before the insects could get to him.
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Old 02-26-2006, 03:56 PM   #3257
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Silmaril

Unfortunately, for Sauron, the Mountain didn't stop when it met him; it ran over him, along with everything else in its path.
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Old 02-26-2006, 08:34 PM   #3258
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Fortunately it was Sauron and there was much rejoicing
































...yay
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Old 02-26-2006, 08:37 PM   #3259
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Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.
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White Tree

Unfortunately, Gimli was driving Mount Doom, and even though there was rejoicing for Sauron's death Aragorn was forced to charge Gimli with 60,000 counts of Vehicular homicide and failure to control a dangerous automobile.
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Old 02-26-2006, 08:39 PM   #3260
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Fortunately Sauron was still dead
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Old 02-26-2006, 08:42 PM   #3261
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Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.
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White Tree

Unfortunately Gimli was facing the death penalty...and Sauron started to take shape again...
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Old 02-27-2006, 12:31 AM   #3262
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Fortunately, as it was Sauron, Gimli was let off the hook, and Gimli left the handbrake off in the Mountain and Sauron was run over again.
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Old 02-27-2006, 05:30 AM   #3263
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The Eye Unfortunately . . .

. . . Sauron learned to dodge this time.

( to Hookbill)
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Old 02-27-2006, 10:03 AM   #3264
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Fortunately, some of the cheese 'Smack down' was on the floor and Sauron got his foot trapped in it!
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Old 02-27-2006, 02:06 PM   #3265
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Unfortunately, Mount Zoom broke down.
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Old 02-27-2006, 02:08 PM   #3266
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Fortunately, it still got pretty good speed in neutral if you were pointed downhill.
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Old 02-27-2006, 02:53 PM   #3267
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Unfortunately, Mount Zoom's speed kept it going
until it jammed into the main entrance to the
Lonely Mountain, presenting Smaug,
back from his success in The Hobbit Survivor,
with a quandary.
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Old 02-27-2006, 02:56 PM   #3268
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Fortunately, Smaug had the brilliant idea to use the cracks of doom to open a world famous spa! Hot pools for the warm-blooded, and lava swimming pools for the very very very cold blooded. (Mostly Smaug just worked on his lava-tan.)
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Old 02-27-2006, 03:23 PM   #3269
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Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.
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White Tree

Unfortunately smaug was sued for 5 billion dollars in his riches, because too many people were rather...burnt to a crisp from his Mount Doom Spa resort.
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Old 02-27-2006, 04:04 PM   #3270
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Fortunately, Smaug was a master speaker and he convinced everyone that it was all Gandalf's fault.
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Old 02-27-2006, 11:05 PM   #3271
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Unfortunately so was Gandalf, but Gandy was confuing so they ended up blaming hte Mutant Dog
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Old 02-28-2006, 12:27 AM   #3272
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Tolkien Fortunately . . .

(DUN DUN DUN!!!)

. . . the Mutant Dog vanished in a puff of canonicity.
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Old 02-28-2006, 12:51 AM   #3273
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Unfortunately, the smoke left by the puff of canonicity polluted the water.
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Old 02-28-2006, 06:52 AM   #3274
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Tuor of Gondolin has just left Hobbiton.
Fortunately, the only water pollluted was
The Watcher's pool, which he found quite
refreshing after regenerating some
arms those nine intruders had
thoughtlessly attacked when he
was trying to shake their hands.
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Old 02-28-2006, 10:44 PM   #3275
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Narya

Unfortunately, the Watcher's polluted pool water turned out to be toxic waste and he regenerated arms where they shouldn't be and grew an extra head, also where that shouldn't be.

Last edited by Naria; 02-28-2006 at 10:48 PM.
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Old 03-01-2006, 12:38 AM   #3276
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Fortunately, he caught a glimpse of himself in a mirror and flew out of the pool, set himself on fire and leaped off a cliff.
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Old 03-01-2006, 04:23 AM   #3277
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White-Hand Unfortunately . . .

. . . Denethor sued him for copyright infringement.
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Old 03-01-2006, 08:19 AM   #3278
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Tuor of Gondolin has just left Hobbiton.
Fortunately Billy Flynn, the famous Chicago lawyer
who successfully got Velma Kelly and Roxie Hart
off on murder charges, brilliantly defended The
Watcher.
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Old 03-01-2006, 04:05 PM   #3279
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Silmaril

Unfortunately, for the lawyers, the masses knew the cold truth behind the smooth lies. They gathered pitchforks, culbs, and torches, and beat The Watcher to within an inch of his life.
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Old 03-01-2006, 06:30 PM   #3280
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Eye Fortunately . . .

. . . the Watcher swam away.
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