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Old 05-09-2002, 10:09 AM   #321
Vinyaampawen
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Sting

Aragorn: But Arwen is the hottest elf in Middle Earth! No other elf holds a candle to her.

Gandalf: "Hottest elf"! Is this the way you are to speak of your betrothed? Anyway have you checked out the Visgoths lately? They are pretty hold stuff too!

Legolas: Well Aragorn...I think you should visit the Visgoths while I pay a visit to Arwen. Don't you believe in "sharesies"? Arwen has a "thing" for me. After all, I have been around longer.

Aragorn: Well, o.k. I will check out the Visgoths...but don't bring anymore whipped cream to Arwen and you can forget about using ours when you go visit Arwen. Anyway...Arwen is starting to like honey spread all over her body. Try that!

Legolas: Hey Bud! Thanks for the heads up! [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]
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Old 05-09-2002, 02:10 PM   #322
Lothiriel Silmarien
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Silmaril

lol, that's a really good one!
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Old 05-10-2002, 07:54 AM   #323
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Sting

Legolas: Okay, who farted? Gandalf? Don't be shy.

Boromir: Legolas, Legolas, let down your hair, that I may climb the golden stair!
Legolas (looking down from the tower): Eew! Go kiss an orc! You ain't getting your filthy hands of my pretty elfie hair!

Elrond (in balcony, singing in a tenor voice with one hand on his chest and the other in front of him): A drrream is a wish yourrrr hearrrt makes...
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Old 05-10-2002, 09:26 AM   #324
Frodo Baggins
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Sting

I have one

Bilbo or Frodo to the Sackville-Bagginses: Oh no really! Stay for tea! I insist!
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Old 05-10-2002, 10:52 AM   #325
Lothiriel Silmarien
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1420!

At Aragorn's bachelor party-

Aragorn: Ok, guys, I can't do anything bad, I'm getting married.

Eomer: Oh, yeah well Aragorn that's too bad. I'm getting married too and you don't see me whining! Enjoy the last few hours of your single life! FREEEEEDOMMM.

Aragorn: *looks at Eomer strangely* Yeah.....ok I guess your right anyway.

Faramir: Bring out the whipped cream!!!!!

*The boys are having a most splendid evening, Faramir spreading the whipped cream over the ladies and Eomer and Aragorn licking it off. Frodo and Merry are dancing on a table, and Pippin is getting drunk and spilling his beer over everyone while singing a groovy tune. Gandalf is off parading around in his fanciful robes with Legolas swinging around his hair like a headbanger. Gimli is having his beard braided while judging a wet shirt contest, and Sam.....wait, where is Sam?!!!

*The big cake comes rolling out, while Pippin is leading everyone into a drunken rendition of "Happy Birthday". They seem to be singing it very well, but Pippin is too drunk and forgets most of the words and throws everyone off. But they don't seem to mind, all they want is their cake!!*

Aragorn: Oh yeah baby, let me make my wish!

*Aragorn is just about to joyfully settle down to have his cake, while Sam comes bursting out of the cake! He startles everyone, including Aragorn who screams like a little girl*

Sam: Haaahaaaaaa, Happy Birthday big boy! Did I scare you????

Aragorn: No, I uh.....I uh just um wasn't expecting you to pop out.

Sam: *who is pretty drunk by the way* Well, don't worry mister birthday man I'm saving my birthday dance for Mister Frodo's birthday...hehe mister Frodo, I'm gonna suuuurpriiiiiise you!!!

Aragorn: Hey, uh Sam? It isn't my birthday. And you just spoiled your "surprise" that you were gonna do for Frodo's birthday...

Sam: Damn! I knew something was wrong. Oh, well....Mister Frodo, be surrrrpriiiised, oops. Sssshhhh, don't say anything, it's a surprise!!

Frodo: Ok, this is scaring me. Is Sam more drunk than Pippin???!!!!

Pippin: *who says in a drunk voice, so it's kinda hard to hear what he's saying* No way!!! NO one gets drunkerer than ME!!

Aragorn: Whatever people, let's have my cake!

*everyone screams along* YEEEEEEEAAAAAAH!!!
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Old 05-10-2002, 10:55 AM   #326
Lothiriel Silmarien
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Silmaril

I had to end it in some way.
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Old 05-11-2002, 07:04 AM   #327
Eomer of the Rohirrim
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Sting

Very funny. I know he died but this is hardly wanting accuracy; was Boromir getting down at that party? He always seemed like he would be life of the party to me. Well, apart from Merry and Pippin.

If I can add on....

Faramir: Well look over here, it's Boromir!

Aragorn: Hey man! You shoulda been here earlier.

Boromir: You're gonna forgive me when you see what I've got. Come on girls! (brings out a host Lothlorien babes)

Eomer: Elf chicks! Now that's what I'm talking about!

Boromir: And that's not all, I brought my Andrew WK cd.

(puts on CD)

Pippin: Yeah, lesh get a parry sarted !!!!!!!

Gandalf: Andrew WK! Oh yeah! Party over here!

Frodo: Come on guys, we're not all as wasted as you. Faramir! If you MUST do that with those Elven girls then please do it upstairs! Merry, put those pants back on...

Merry: You're kiddin' Mr.Frodo! EVERYBODY GET NAKED!

Arwen: Oh my Gosh Aragorn! What is going on here? Where are you Aragorn!?

Gimli: He's right over there sweety, with that Rohan chick

Aragorn: Arwen! Honey! I can explain!

Arwen: This marriage is off!

Aragorn: Come on! I was drunk! Doesn't that count for anything anymore?

(relative quiet)

Boromir: You scratched MY cd?
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Old 05-11-2002, 08:12 PM   #328
Lothiriel Silmarien
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Silmaril

That was hilarious! I liked that very much and it's a good extension. Yeah, now that I think of it, Boromir does seem like he'd be the life of the party. Too bad he died, he would definetly have gotten that party going. And the Andrew WK cd is so Boromir. Anything heavy metal and hard rock I would agree with [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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Old 05-11-2002, 08:23 PM   #329
Lothiriel Silmarien
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Silmaril

Ooh, kudos to you your from Scotland! I love anything that has to do with Scotland, so I had to point that out. Most likely I did already, but oh well.
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Old 05-11-2002, 08:41 PM   #330
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The Eye

LOL, those are so funny! So much for keeping it clean though...!! [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]
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Old 05-12-2002, 10:11 AM   #331
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Sting

I know the guy who started said keep it clean but it has degenerated (sorry!)

What can I say about Andrew WK? The guy is the choice of Boromir AND Gandalf!

Party hard Middle Earth!
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Old 05-12-2002, 06:44 PM   #332
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Silmaril

Very true, I forgot about Gandalf-imagine seeing Gandalf at one of those concerts though? Swinging around his long hair and throwing people into mosh pits. Yeah Gandalf!! lol, but for keeping it clean.....ok come on, that's just really hard. there's only so much jokes you can make and keep clean. I tried to keep it as clean as I could cuz I don't wanna get in trouble or something, but atleast I didn't curse!!! Sorry though, I don't wanna seem like I'm inconsiderate or something. I'll try and remember that next time I post something up [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]
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Old 05-13-2002, 03:05 AM   #333
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Sam: I hope communism kicks in soon

Orcs: We like short shorts!

Denethor: Lighten up eh?

Aragorn: Another 100 miles? I really need some ice cream!

I was wondering if this is the longest running thread? Really, to keep the comedy of such high quality this number of posts is exceptional.

Well done!
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Old 05-13-2002, 01:59 PM   #334
Lothiriel Silmarien
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Silmaril

I think it is the longest running thread. I mean it does have 9 pages!!! The most other than this was like 5 pages. I atleast think so, but someone else may know for certain. And that post about the orcs reminds me of the shaving cream commercial. Skintimate......or not. Ok, maybe it's just me though!
You know what would be funny though! Orcs doing Riverdance!!! They'd be doing the flips and everything. That would be twisted...orcs on crack. lol, that would be funny too! An orc thats high....hey, do you know what makes string string....? And then they go to battle but charge at people with the hilts of their swords instead of the pointed knife edge. Ok, again maybe it's just me that would find this hilarious to see! this is by far my favorite thread [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]

Orc fighting in battle: *says to the enemy he's fighting*- Hey, you gotta smoke?

Man: Yeah sure, need a light?

*some demented, misshaped form of an orc flys by

Orc: Yeah that'd be great. *lights up cigarette* Oh yeah, the good stuff....Hey, maybe after he war, you know, we could hang out or something, kill an extra couple of stray animals, people, whatever...

Man: Yeah, that sounds great but I think I have to try to kill you first. You know, it's what we're supposed to be doing I think.

*a severed arm flies by and nearly misses the orcs head*

Orc: Oh yeah, right, right. Sorry if I kill you though, just so I say this now because, well I won't be able to if your dead!

*they both laugh that corny tv fake laugh, but a flying razor frisbee thing flies by and slices the orc's head off. The head then falls to the ground and rolls over to the man's feet*

Man: Guess I was the one who should have said that!! *he laughs that stupid laugh, but an arrow shoots right through him, and he falls to the floor*

Hope that wasn't too stupid.
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Old 05-13-2002, 02:20 PM   #335
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Silmaril

Éowyn (in the Houses of Healing): "Oh, my head hurts so much! I think I'll faint. Please, someone bring the smelling salts! Ohh, my back! Will you bring me another blanket, nurse? I'm absolutely freezing. Oh, I don't think I'll get out of bed in a month. I might even die."
*starts to cry*
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Old 05-17-2002, 04:37 AM   #336
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Sting

Gandalf: Fool of a Took! Throw yourself in next time, and rid us of your stupidity!

Aragorn: What happened?

Gandalf: Peregrin here dropped a stone in the well, not thinking about our danger and possibly putting us in a lot of trouble

Aragorn: Oh Pippin! Why'd ya go and do that hey?

Pippin: Gee, I'm sorry guys...

Aragorn: Oh! Well! If he's sorry then eh chaps? I suppose, while your at it, you might as well go and just...SURRENDER... us to the Orcs eh? I guess you could just go and do that eh?

Frodo: Come on Strider, he knows he made a mistake, let him go

Aragorn: No, no, no, no, no, no. Is that just me? Am I the only one who has a problem with this.....amateur? Is that it?

Gandalf: Bloody hell Aragorn! Even I can see that the lad's sorry....

Pippin: When did you start speaking like a woman Aragorn?

Aragorn: Oh! Oh my GAWD! Please someone tell me he did not just say that!

Merry: Not really a woman, more like a 14 year old girl....

Aragorn: Oooooh! I could just explode! Listen here Merry....

Balrog: Uh...guys? You're kinda running a bit late. Can we move on from here?

Gandalf: Right, sorry man
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Old 05-17-2002, 03:48 PM   #337
Lothiriel Silmarien
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Silmaril

That's a good one! Poor Pippin [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img] The Balrog made them hurry cuz he probably has an appointment to get his nails done. Hey, a Balrog's gotta do what a Balrog's gotta do! That's probably not the reason but oh well.

Sauron: *on the phone with the Nazgul next door*- Hmm, hey Nazgul #9.

Nazgul: Hey Sauron, what's up? You sound depressed.

Sauron: Yeah well....oh nevermind.

Nazgul: No what Sauron, you know you can tell me anything. I'm always here for you.

Sauron: Thanks man, that really touches me. Well.....it's just

Nazgul: Yeah, what is it Sauron....

Sauron: I'm just lonely. Nobody likes me, my followers have all gone to war and left me, and I'm just this eye......a lonely eye with no one to turn to.

Nazgul: Oh Sauron, don't fret. If you want I can be there in a quicky quicky half hour or so.

Sauron: No, no that's ok #9. You don't have to.

Nazgul: No come on I want to....I insist.

Sauron: No, really you don't have to.

Nazgul: Oh come on, we can play scrabble!

Sauron: weeeell....

Nazgul: And then we can bake some cookies!

Sauron: Well, ok ok.
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Old 05-17-2002, 04:06 PM   #338
Lothiriel Silmarien
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Silmaril

The secret love story of Sauron and Saruman:

*Sauron and Saruman are just connecting with the palantir. It's the usual time when they get in touch with each other.*

Saruman looks into his palantir, hoping to catch Sauron when he's not looking....

Sauron: Saruman! I told you don't do that! I could be not at my best....you know I have to get ready!

Saruman: Yeah, I know that's what I was hoping for...

Sauron: Saruman, your so bad!

Saruman: Sauron, how dd it go....does he know yet?

Sauron: Sshh, Saruman, no I didn't tell him yet. Keep it quiet, I don't want him knowing yet.

Saruman: Sauron! You gotta tell him! This can't go on any longer like this.

Sauron: I know, I know. It's just not the right time yet, you know. He's a very sensitive one, I can't just flat out tell him about us. He'll be too hurt. And I don't want him doing anything rash.

Saruman: You know you gotta tell him though. You can't keep putting it off like this. Tell him! Come on, tell him now!

Sauron: No, I will, wait I...

Nazgul #9: Sauron....what are you doing? Who are you talking to?

Saruman: Is he there?? Was that him?

Sauron: Shh, hold on...Yes Nazgy?

'Nazgy': Sauron, what are you doing, are you coming soon?

Sauron: I'll be there in a minute booboo. Hold on, I just gotta....um, I just gotta

'Nazgy': Is that Saruman your talking to?!

Sauron: No, it's uh....

'Nazgy': Ooh! Let me talk to him, I gotta tell him something.

Sauron: Wait, but

'Nazgy': Hey Saruman, what's up.

Saruman: Listen, I gotta tell you something.

Sauron: No don't wait!

Saruman: No...#9 listen. Me and Sauron...we...we've been seeing each other for quite a while. And we're pretty serious and all, you know.

Nazgul: What!? Sauron, is this true!???

Sauron: Wait, Nazgy hunny, I ment to tell you, I really did!

Nazgul: No, no just save it Sauron....we're through!

Sauron: Wait, but!!! Saruman, how could you!

Saruman: Oh Sauron, you knew it had to be done, I just told him first that's all. Sauron....I love you...

Sauron: What....you do?

Saruman: Yes, I do.

Sauron: Saruman I.....

*Next, on The Dead and the Useless......*
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Old 05-17-2002, 05:02 PM   #339
Elenya
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Silmaril

My sister gave this one to me. Has anyone seen The Others, that Nicole Kidman flick? Well anyhoo:

Elrond: Where is my daughter?
Legolas: I am your daughter.

I know, it's not that funny, but can't you just picture it?
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Old 05-17-2002, 05:09 PM   #340
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Pipe

Sorry to have to bring this up but Elenya your comment reminded me very much of an earlier one and this is even more of a sight to see

Gandalf: He told me you killed him.....

Balrog: No Gandalf, I am your father

Once again i do apologise, but just had to put that down [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img]
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Old 05-17-2002, 10:04 PM   #341
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Gimli (drags Troll off Pippin): Whoa, dude, that troll guy just dropped on top of you! I was so worried!
Pippin(moans): oooh... that was weird... but... I'm okay!
Audience: Hurray!
Gimli(puts Pippins arm around his shoulder): That's great, dude! Let's go get you all fixed up!
Pippin: Thanks man!
Gimli: Hey, guess what dude? We won!
Pippin: Gimme five!
(Gimli 'gives five')
Gimli: you know what this means, don't you?
Pippin: Oh, yeah!
Gimli and Pippin(singing): We are the champions my friends... we'll keep on fightin' til the end... we are the champions, we are the champions... no time for losers, 'cause we are the champions...
Arwen: HEY! Don't sing that song! It's by Queen! And I'm the only queen! The Once and Future Queen!
[Pippin and Gimli exchange glances, shrug]
Pippin and Gimli [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]on't dis us, Arwen! Because... (singing) We are.. we are.. the youth of the Na-a-tion...
Arwen: Argh!
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Old 05-18-2002, 07:10 PM   #342
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Arwen - Does this come in black? Blue is SO not my colour..
Bilbo - Quest? What quest? Nah. I think I'll live here in Bag End happily ever after.
Eowyn - Who cares about Aragorn! There's always Gimli!
Fatty Bolger - What? Steak? No thanks. I'm on a diet. Could you hand me the salad dressing?
Pippin - Oi, Merry! Stop teasing that Gandalf and give me another another back rub!
Arwen to Eowyn - Don't even go there, girlfriend!
Gandalf - Ring schminz, let's have a cup of tea and discuss my personal matters.
[img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]
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Old 05-19-2002, 07:56 AM   #343
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Pippin: I want my ale
Gandalf: I want my smoke
Sauron: I want my ring
Frodo: I want my MTV

Frodo: Your crazy, I would NEVER sing along to Nickelback (oh sorry, that should be in the thread 'Things they would say')

Orc: When I grow up, I wanna be a Nazgul!

Witch-King of Angmar: Oooh, my scones are ready!

The Barrow-Wight to Frodo: I have my own Middle Earth website y'know...

Gandalf: Barrowdowns.com isn't all its cracked up to be

Treebeard: When I finish my coke, I just throw the can away, don't you?

Prince Imrahil: Wait a minute, your marrying my daughter? How old am I? (ok, thats irrelevant, but I wanna know how old Imrahil is)

Eomer: Lothiriel, sweety, how does your dad look so young? I gotta pay a visit to his salon

Arwen: Sometimes I just wanted to get more....involved, y'know?

Gandalf: Butterbur you forgetful nuisance! I'm getting a mobile

Sam: I stand by my opinion that Lenin was superior to Stalin, with regards to ideals, AND effective politics
Pippin: No way! Lenin was weak! Stalin had the iron that was needed to run the country

Gandalf: N Sync
Aragorn: No
Gandalf: I'm telling you N Sync rock harder than the Backstreet Boys
Aragorn: You're kidding! Backstreet boys are way cuter anyway..
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Old 05-19-2002, 11:50 AM   #344
Lothiriel Silmarien
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Silmaril

Those were funny, except I don't know what you meant by the Nickelback comment, but I hope it wasn't bad!! I'm a little stupid today, sorry. Guess I tripped over the damn cat too many times. lol, Aragorn listening to Backstreet Boys.......my worst nightmare.
Ok, I thought of another thing. I just thought of it because of that comment. When Gandalf is on the bridge of Khazad-dum, he and the Balrog start dancing to Nsync, Bye Bye Bye. And instead of "You shall not pass", it would be bye bye bye. And since they'd be singing to Nsync, they fall off because such bad music couldn't be tolerated, and the bridge broke. And that's why they lost Gandalf-because of his bad taste in music. Ok, not so good, but I tried.
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Old 05-19-2002, 04:31 PM   #345
Lothiriel Silmarien
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Hey people, we really need to start posting more comments, ok. There is a topic in novices and newcomers and it has something like 326 comments.....we can't let them beat us!!!! Even though we still do have more, they will catch up! And plus, I like reading all the funny things you people say.

[ May 19, 2002: Message edited by: Lothiriel Silmarien ]
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Old 05-19-2002, 04:40 PM   #346
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Frodo: Come one! Come All! Evil Creatures wanting the Ring, Here It Is! I'm Starting the bid at $20.00!"
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Old 05-19-2002, 04:58 PM   #347
Daniel Telcontar
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Gandalf: No Frodo, do not tempt me!! I do not wish the Ri... No wait, on the other hand, I think it would be safe here with me. Just be a good little hobbit and hand it over. (Hehehe [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img])
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Old 05-20-2002, 07:03 AM   #348
Eomer of the Rohirrim
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Frodo is way too cool to listen to Nickelback.

And no way will any thread ever beat this one.

Aragorn: Stop! Stop the Battle! We are needed at barrowdowns.com

Witch King: How come?

Aragorn: The thread 'Things LotR characters would never say' needs more posts!

Witch King: Oh, uh, ok, how about this - Eowyn would NEVER say 'Just bring it Witch King you filthy little tart!'

Eowyn: That's true

Aragorn: Yeah, thats the idea! Get posting guys!
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Old 05-20-2002, 07:04 AM   #349
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ok so that one was REAL cheap, but it was still funny in a corny sort of way
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Old 05-20-2002, 01:41 PM   #350
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Silmaril

Corny is funny.
And I'm not gonna get started on what you said about Nickelback.....but Frodo is cool, you weren't lying there. Actually I think Frodo is too cool to listen to the gaystreet boys and nstink. No offense to the people who like them, sorry. And Britney too, he would never listen to her either. Just in my opinion, so please don't bite my head off people! Now I gotta think of something....oh ok, got something. Although it may not be all that good.

*In Moria*
Gandalf is hurrying the company toward the Bridge.

Gandalf: Frodo, hurry up! The Balrog is coming!

Frodo: Wait Gandalf, I can't leave without him!

Gandalf: Frodo you must!

Frodo: No!!! He's been by my side this whole time, I can't leave him now.

Gandalf: Forget it Frodo you must come!

Sam: Don't worry Mr. Frodo I'm here!

Frodo: No Sam, my Ken doll! I left my Ken doll back there!

*The fellowship safely passes through Moria*

Gandalf: I wonder why that Balrog never came to get us...

Balrog: Get your hands off my Ken doll orc!!

Orc: I found him first!

Balrog: Want me to burn you damn head off?!! Didn't think so.
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Old 05-20-2002, 02:00 PM   #351
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Elrond sits down on his pouffy couch in Rivendell, glad to relax now that that pesky Fellowship is gone. I mean, really. Legolas trying all his hiar care products, and Boromir and Aragorn fighting over Arwen... it can really wear you out.
*turns on T.V.*
"Today, on Fashion Spy..."
Elrond: My favourite show!
"...you will be seeing the Fashion Greats, and the Fashion Mistakes."
*Elrond is aborbsed.*
"Here is today's Fashion Greats. We planted a secret camera at the Council of Elrond to get the footage you see here."
*Elrond sits straight up*
Elrond: That's my council! I'm on T.V.! They think I'm a fashion great!
"If you look to the corner, you'll see him. His blond hair is perfectly balanced by his silver robes..."
*Announcer blahs on and on about how great this guy is, Elrond acts very smug, convinced its him*
"And the name of our Fashion Great is..."
Elrond: Me! It's me! Elrond!
"...Legolas!"
*Elrond too shocked to do anything.Just sits there gaping.*
"Now, on his opposite is our fashion mistake. Those robes are totally second age, and I think I can still see battle smears from the Last Alliance!.."
*Announcer blahs on and on about how bad this guy is. then:*
"...and this poor unfortunate soul's name is... Elrond!"
*Elrond bursts into tears*
Elrond: Nooot faair! I'm w-w-way prettier than L-l-legolas! I'm gonna take a ba-a-ath!
*retreats sniffing to his bathroom, where we can soon hear him talking to his rubber ducky and singing.*
Elrond: ducky, everyone's so mean to me! *sniff*
Ducky: quack squeak.
Elrond: You really think so?
Ducky: squeak squeakity quack.
Elrond: Oh, me too! Let's elope! I'm so over Celebrian!
Ducky: Cluck squeak quackity.

"Next week on the Desperate and Deranged..."
p.s.: I do not in anyway mean offence to Elrond. Elrond is cool. This is stuff they'd NEVER say, remember?
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Old 05-20-2002, 02:20 PM   #352
Lothiriel Silmarien
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Silmaril

lol, quack squeak quack.
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~*~Now lost, lost to those from the East is Valimar!
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Old 05-22-2002, 11:33 AM   #353
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Aragorn: Hasta la Vista....baby

Gimli: If ya smeeeeeeellllll what the Dwarf is cookin'!

Arwen: Don't call me babe

Galadriel: Call me babe
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Old 05-22-2002, 11:43 AM   #354
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Inspired by gangsta films;


Gandalf: I'm gonna beat you so bad!

Saruman: What?

Gandalf: I'm a beat you so bad!

Saruman: What?

Gandalf: .....you get the point.

Saruman: Mmm Hmm, I got your point!

(scuffle breaks out)

Eowyn: Ooooh! Come on now, back it up G

Saruman: Yeah, you know I got'chu

Eowyn: Ooooh! Listen here now, you better step right out of his face !

Gandalf: Yeah that's right sucka!

Wormtongue: Oh come on now, what? You call him a sucka? Them's fighting words!

Gandalf: Damn straight! If you got the fortitude, you meet me here next week, after I take out that punk Sauron!

Aragorn: I do hate to interrupt but must we really act so barbaric? I'm royalty don't you know...

Saruman: Back up white boy

Aragorn: Excuse me?

Saruman: Uh...nevermind, looky here. I take both you suckas out RIGHT NOW! Anyone got a problem wit that?

Frodo: Uh, guys, I lost the ring
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Old 05-22-2002, 11:53 AM   #355
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Frodo: Sunshine, lollipops and rainbows!

Sam: Oh, I hate this place!

Frodo: Oh come on Sam! Cheer up! We'll be home before you know it

Sam: But you heard what Mr Gandalf said Frodo, we're likely to die while doing this task. Oh the humanity!

Frodo: No Sam, look ahead! We're almost there, you'll see!

Sam: I don't wanna

Frodo: Well Sam, if you're going to be grouchy then you can just wait here until I get back and we'll walk home then ok?

Sam: Really?

Frodo: I don't want you to do something you don't want to.

Sam: Oh Mr Frodo! Thank you sir! (runs away in glee)

Sam: Oh that lad!

*days later*

Gollum: Yesss precious, finally we gets it back don't we?

Frodo: Oh! Gollum, you scared me!

Gollum: Oh but we mustn't be scared in this land mustn't we precious? Yessss, must be cheerful and look ahead, yes, yess!

Frodo: Can the sweet talk Gollum, I've heard you speaking to Faramir's men and it's nothing like that

Gollum: Look, I was bored ok? It became a habit

Frodo: So what now?

Gollum: Ah, just get rid of the Ring, I don't care for it. You know the whole story was made up by Gandalf and Saruman to fool Sauron don't you?

Frodo: Yeah, pretty obvious really, who were G and Elrond trying to kid eh?

Gollum: Ha ha ha! Indeed!

Frodo: Well, so long Gollum

Gollum: Yeah, later Frodo. Hey, I'll give you a call when you get back ok? Come round to my place for some dinner. Bring Sam too, nice chap.
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Old 05-22-2002, 02:36 PM   #356
Lothiriel Silmarien
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Eomer, good gansta one, lol. But add some of the girls like,

Arwen: Girl, you betta watch it. That's my man, you know what I'm sayin?

Eowyn: Naw aw, I'm gon get him if I want you hear me?

Arwen: Mmm, no you did not! No you didn't. Oh no, girl you betta watch it ya hear me?

Something like that I guess. I can't end it I'm too lazy now, lol.
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Old 05-23-2002, 08:46 AM   #357
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Galadriel: Oooh that's right, I'm talking DOWN TOWN! You hearing me?
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Old 05-23-2002, 01:48 PM   #358
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Galadriel *on cell phone*- Celeborn! Can you hear me? Oh, stupid phone. Celeborn! Listen! I'm running out of minutes, so pay attention! We're having guests over for dinner so make some extra lembas while I do the shopping! Okay? Did you hear me? Did you- uh oh, tunnel! *connection dies* Ooh, I hope he heard me. . .
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Old 05-24-2002, 05:43 AM   #359
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Boromir: But Daddy! You got Faramir a new ball! I wanna comic book!
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Old 05-24-2002, 09:44 PM   #360
Olo Gamwich
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1420!

I am amazed at how many people have posted here...
[img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img]
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