The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum


Visit The *EVEN NEWER* Barrow-Downs Photo Page

Go Back   The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum > The New Silmarillion > Translations from the Elvish - Public Forum
User Name
Password
Register FAQ Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read


Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 09-19-2017, 05:49 PM   #1
ArcusCalion
Quentingolmo
 
ArcusCalion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 525
ArcusCalion has just left Hobbiton.
Of Turgon and the Building of Gondolin

This is the first draft of the chapter Of Turgon and the Building of Gondolin.

Our basis text is that of the Later Quenta Silmarillion given in HoME 11. Wherever the text is different from that this is marked by an editing mark.

The markings are:
TBG-xx for tracking the changes from QS to LQ2 (I did not bother with LQ1) as well as additions from the Grey Annals.

Some conventions of my writing:
Normal Text is from the basic text that is mentioned above (when I change the basic-Text it will be mentioned)
Bold Text = source information, comments and remarks
{example} = text that should be deleted
[example] = normalised text, normally only used for general changes
<source example> = additions with source information
...... = This section of the paragraph is unchanged from the source.

Quote:
OF TURGON AND THE BUILDING OF GONDOLIN

It hath been told how ....... should accomplish his design.
Therefore, after the Dagor Aglareb, ....... Sirion protected them.
Now Turgon dwelt ....... called Gondolin [Footnote: {in margin:} the Hidden Rock TBG-01 <LQ2 ; Or so its name was afterwards known and interpreted; but its ancient form and meaning are in doubt. It is said that the name was given first in Quenya (for that language was spoken in Turgon’s house), and was Ondolindë, the Rock of the Music of Water, for there were fountains upon the hill. But the people (who spoke only the Sindarin tongue) altered this name to Gondolin and interpreted it to mean Hidden Rock: ]i]Gond dolen[/i] in their own speech.>]. Then Turgon prepared ...... spake with him. TBG-02 <GA 116 'Now thou shalt go at last to Gondolin, Turgon; and I will set my power in the Vale of Sirion, so that none shall mark thy going, nor shall any find there the hidden entrance to thy land against thy will. Longest of all the realms of the Eldalië shall Gondolin stand against Melkor. But love it not too well, and remember that the true hope of the Noldor lieth in the West and cometh from the Sea.'
§112. And Ulmo warned Turgon that he also lay under the Doom of Mandos, which Ulmo had no power to remove. 'Thus it may come to pass,' he said, 'that the curse of the Noldor shall find thee too ere the end, and treason shall awake within thy walls. Then shall they be in peril of fire. But if this peril draweth nigh, then even from {Nivrost}[Nevrast] one shall come to warn thee, and from him beyond ruin and fire hope shall be born for Elves and Men. Leave, therefore, in this house arms and a sword, that in years to come he may find them, and thus shalt thou know him and be not deceived.' And Ulmo showed to Turgon of what kind and stature should be the mail and helm and sword that he left behind.
§113. Then Ulmo returned to the Sea; and Turgon sent forth all his folk (even to a third part of the Noldor of Fingolfin's House, and a yet greater host of the Sindar), and they passed away, company by company, secretly, under the shadows of {Eryd Wethion}[Ered Wethrin], and came unseen with their wives and goods to Gondolin, and none knew whither they were gone. And last of all Turgon arose and went with his lords and household silently through the hills and passed the gates in the mountains, and they were shut. TBG-03 {But {Nivrost}[Nevrast] was empty of folk and so remained until the ruin of Beleriand.}>
And through many ........ out its fingers from the North.
TBG-04 <GA 66 §91. Now {Galaðriel Finrod’s}[Galadriel Finarfin’s] daughter, ..... but fell ever silent.
§92. And on a time Melian said ....... not tell me more?'
'For that woe is past,’ ...... may seem bright.'
§93. Then Melian looked in ....... Do I not strike near the truth?'
§94. 'Near, lady,’ answered {Galaðriel}[Galadriel], ....... nor of the burning of the ships.
§95. But Melian, who looked ...... Thingol should learn for his guidance.'
'Maybe,' said {Galaðriel}[Galadriel], 'but not of me.'
§96. And Melian spoke then no more ..... ere he fled from Aman.'
§97 Then Thingol was ....... they shall ever make treaty.'
§98. But Melian said .... princes of the Noldor.'
§99. And Thingol said ...... foes of our foe.'
'Their words and their counsels shall have two edges,' said Melian; and afterward they spake no more of this matter.>

TBG-05 <GA 67 §100. It was not long ...... to tell all that he had heard.
§101. And it chanced that at that time ..... thought evil or done evil.'
§103. 'I marvel at thee, ...... seek any pardon!'
§104. And {Inglor}[Finrod] was ...... kinslayers and traitors?' he cried.
§105. 'Yet the shadow of Mandos ....... wrought all this woe our griefs shall be lost.
§106. 'But hear this! Never ..... of kin unrepentant.'
§107. Then the sons of {Finrod}[Finarfin] ....... wherever any of that folk dwelt.>

TBG-06 <GA 102 §108. {About}[During] this time ..... to go with him into exile.>
TBG-01: change from LQ2
TBG-02: this part of the text is given in the Grey Annals
TBG-03: This part was not in the LQ2 text, as it is restated later
TBG-04: This part of the Grey Annals is found nowhere else, and as it takes place right before the completion of Gondolin it should be in this chapter. Considering the name of the chapter is about Turgon, I think it should be placed here (after the Gondolin section) even though it takes place earlier in time.
TBG-05: The next part of the Grey Annals story
TBG-06: The last part of the Grey Annals story
ArcusCalion is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-26-2017, 01:56 PM   #2
Findegil
King's Writer
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 1,694
Findegil is a guest of Tom Bombadil.
To TBG-01 to TBG-03 I agree, and in this part I as well did not find anything to add.

TBG-04 to TBG-06: ArcusCalion, you comment yourself, that these events happened before the building of Gondolin. So I think we should not add them here even so Christopher Tolkien made it in a similar way. The additions that follow from GA do not rightly fit in this position. This is already markable in Sil77. But in this version it is even stronger. I propose to use the chapter title from Sil77 ‘Of the Noldor in Beleriand’ to put this story of Thingol and the Finarfians before the actual chapter ‘Of Turgon and Building of Gondolin’. If you agree to this I would name that change TBG-00.1 and stay with the other makers.

Otherwise I am okay with these stories.

Respectfully
Findegil
Findegil is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-26-2017, 05:08 PM   #3
ArcusCalion
Quentingolmo
 
ArcusCalion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 525
ArcusCalion has just left Hobbiton.
Perhaps we could make this chapter "Of the Noldor in Beleriand" with the Doriath parts first, and then use "Of Turgon and the Building of Gondolin" as a subheading? This way we would preserve the existing chapter number, and would not split an already short chapter into two.
ArcusCalion is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2017, 11:31 AM   #4
Findegil
King's Writer
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 1,694
Findegil is a guest of Tom Bombadil.
The chapters have anyhow be renumbered in the process of editing TftE, therefore I do not see any value in keeping them. And short chapters are not that uncommon in TftE. Therefore I would leave the chapter ‘Turgon and the building of Gondolin’ as such and add ‘Of the Noldor in Beleriand’.

Respectfully
Findegil
Findegil is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2017, 05:12 PM   #5
ArcusCalion
Quentingolmo
 
ArcusCalion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 525
ArcusCalion has just left Hobbiton.
Very well
ArcusCalion is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 12:22 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.9 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.