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Old 10-06-2017, 06:11 PM   #1
ArcusCalion
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Silmaril Of the Siege of Angband

This chapter is the last of the First Age chapters to have a draft posted! Hurray for progress!

This is the first draft of the chapter Of the Siege of Angband.

Our basis text is that of "Of the Siege of Angband" given in HoME V. Wherever the text is different from HoME V, this is marked by an editing mark.

The markings are:
SA-LQ-xx for tracking any changes from the QS text to the LQ texts
SA-EX-xx for tracking any other additions or changes

These are General Name changes from LQ1 and LQ2 and are not marked in the draft: Eruman >Araman, Tun > Túna, Gnomes > Noldor, Thorndor > Thorondor, Bladorion > Ard-galen, Maidros > Maedros (the last only for the QS/LQ texts, not GA additions)

Some conventions of my writing:
Normal Text is from the basic text that is mentioned above (when I change the basic-Text it will be mentioned)
Bold Text = source information, comments and remarks
{example} = text that should be deleted
[example] = normalised text, normally only used for general changes
<source example> = additions with source information
...... = This section of the paragraph is unchanged from the source.

Quote:
SA-EX-01 <GA OF THE COMING OF THE NOLDOR>

SA-LQ-01 {§88. Before the rising of the Moon Fëanor ..... This was the first battle of Beleriand} <As was before told Fëanor and his sons came first of the Exiles to Middle-earth, and they landed in the waste of Lammoth upon the outer shores of the Firth of Drengist. Now that ..... ships at Losgar went down the winds of the Sea as a tumult of great wrath, and far away all that heard that sound was filled with wonder. SA-EX-02 <GA §42. Now the flames of that burning were seen not only by Fingolfin, whom Fëanor had deserted, but also by the Orcs and the watchers of Morgoth. No tale hath told what Morgoth thought in his heart at the tidings that Fëanor his bitterest foe had brought a host out of the West. Maybe he feared him little, for he had not yet had proof of the swords of the Noldor, and soon it was seen that he purposed to drive them back into the Sea.>
Under the cold stars before the rising of the Moon Fëanor and his folk marched eastward{, and they}. SA-EX-03 <GA Drengist is a long firth which pierces the Echoing Hills of {Eryd}[Ered] Lómin that are the west-fence of the great country of Hithlum. Thus the host of Fëanor> passed the {Eryd}[Ered] Lómin, and came into the great land of Hithlum, and crossing the country of Dor-Lómin they came at length to the long lake of Mithrim, and upon its north-shore they made their first camp in that region which was called by the like name.
SA-EX-04 {There a host of the Orcs, aroused ..... sons never to treat or parley with their foe.}<GA §44 But the host of Melkor, orcs and werewolves, came through the passes of {Eryd-wethrin}[Ered Wethrin] and assailed Fëanor on a sudden, ..... Eldar no more than a handful of leaves.
§45 Yet cause he had for great joy, ...... to his aid, and the Balrogs fled back to Angband.
§46. Then his sons raised up their father ....... of whose deeds came both their greatest renown and their most grievous woe.

§47. Tidings of these great deeds ....... princes in might out of the West, eager for new realms.
§48. Thus there was from the first ....... long severance the tongue of the SA-EX-05 {Kalaquendi}[Amanyar] in Valinor and the {Moriquendi}[Úmanyar] in Beleriand had drawn far apart.

§49. Now Morgoth being dismayed by the rout of his armies and the unlooked-for valor of the Noldor, and desiring time for new designs, sent emissaries to {Maidros}[Maedros] SA-EX-06 <moved from next sentence the tall, the eldest son,> {§89. Yet even in the hour of his death an embassy came to them from Morgoth,} acknowledging defeat, and offering terms, even to the surrender of a Silmaril. Then Maedros moved up {the tall, the eldest son,} persuaded the Noldor to feign to treat with Morgoth, and to meet his emissaries .... and brought to Angband and tortured.
§90. Then the SA-EX-07 {six} brethren of Maedros ...... and they were unwilling to depart, SA-LQ-02 {whatever he might do.}<whatever he might do, being held by their oath.> Therefore Morgoth ..... right hand in a band of steel.
§91. Now rumor came to the camp in Hithlum of the march of Fingolfin and his sons, and {Inglor the son of Finrod}[Finrod the son of Finarfin], who had crossed the Grinding Ice. ...... Fingolfin marched into Mithrim the Sun rose flaming SA-LQ-03 {in the West}<above the shadows>; and Fingolfin unfurled ...... was come into the world SA-LQ-04 {, and good was made of evil, as happens still}. Then the Orcs .... their trumpets shook the towers of Thangorodrim.
SA-EX-08 {§92. But Fingolfin doubted the wiles of Morgoth, and he withdrew from the doors of hell, and turned back unto Mithrim, so that Eredwethion, the Shadow Mountains, might shelter his folk while they rested.} <GA §58. Now Fingolfin, being of other temper than Fëanor, and wary of the wiles of Morgoth, after sounding his challenge withdrew from Dor-Daedeloth and turned towards Mithrim, for he had heard tidings that there he should find the sons of Fëanor, and he desired also to have the shield of the mountains, while his folk rested and grew strong; for he had seen the strength of Angband and deemed not that it would fall to the sound of trumpets only. Therefore coming at length to Hithlum he made his first camp and dwelling by the north-shore of Lake Mithrim.>
But there was little love between those that followed Fingolfin and the house of Fëanor; for the agony of those that had endured the crossing of the ice had been great, and their hearts were filled with bitterness SA-EX-09 <GA ; and though Fingolfin learned that Fëanor was dead, he held his sons the accomplices of their father, and there was peril of war between the two hosts>. The numbers of the host of SA-LQ-05 {Túna}<Tirion> had been diminished ...... , and the lake lay between the peoples. SA-EX-10 <GA §60. Many indeed of Fëanor’s folk repented them sorely of the deed at Losgar, and were astounded at the valor which had brought the friends that they abandoned over the Ice of the North, and they would have welcomed them humbly had they dared for shame.> In this the work of the curse was seen, for the delay wrought by their feud did great harm to the fortunes of all the Noldor. They achieved nothing upon the Orcs SA-EX-11 <GA , while Morgoth was dismayed and his servants still cowed by the sudden light.>
§93. Then Morgoth arose from ..... seen in Hithlum, staining the bright airs SA-LQ-06 {of those earliest of mornings.}< in the first mornings of the world.> The North shook ..... , dark and poisonous.

SA-LQ-07 <Of Fingon and Maedros>

§94. Then Fingon the valiant resolved to heal the feud. Of all the children of Finwë he is justly most SA-LQ-08 {renowned}<honored>: for his valor was ..... of his torment troubled his heart SA-LQ-09 <, and long before, in the bliss of Valinor, ere Melkor was unchained, or lies came between them, he had been close in friendship with Maedros> SA-EX-12 <GA (though he knew not yet that {Maidros}[Maedros] had not forgotten him at the burning of the ships)>. Aided by the very ....... aught save cries of fear and woe.
§95. Thus he found what he sought. ....... , and recall some pity for the SA-LQ-10 {banished Gnomes}<Noldor in their need>!'
§96. Now his prayer was answered ....... ; and he stayed Fingon's hand.
§97. Thorondor was the mightiest ..... and Thorondor bore them both to Mithrim.
§98. There Maedros in time was ...... By this deed Fingon won great renown, and all the Noldor praised him; and the feud SA-LQ-11 {was healed}<was assuaged> between Fingolfin and the sons of Fëanor. But Maedros begged forgiveness for the desertion in Araman, and SA-EX-13 {gave back the goods of Fingolfin that had been borne away in the ships; and he waived his claim to kingship over all the Noldor. To} to this his brethren did not all in their hearts agree. SA-EX-14 {Therefore the house of Fëanor were called the Dispossessed, (as Mandos foretold) because the overlordship passed from it, the elder, to the house of Fingolfin, both in Elendë and in Beleriand, and because also of the loss of the Silmarils.} But there was now a peace and a truce to jealousy; yet still there held the binding oath.

SA-EX-15 Of the Siege of Angband

§99. Now the Noldor being reunited marched ..... far and wide over the land, and they built there many fair habitations, and established realms SA-EX-16 {; for save in Doriath and in Ossiriand (of which more is after said) there were few folks there before them. These ...... that the restraint of Morgoth would last forever.} <GA §63. Beyond the Girdle of Melian those of {Finrod}[Finarfin]’s house were suffered to pass, for they could claim ..... of the deeds of Fëanor save his valiant death.
§64. And King Thingol hearkened, ....... or who seek me in great need.'
§65. Now the Noldor held council ...... of war in the highlands.
§66. To this council came Angrod ....... we shall go as seems good to us.'
§67. But {Cranthir}[Caranthir], who loved not ..... , though their mother was of other kin.'
§68. Then Angrod was exceedingly wroth ...... burst forth in rash word or violence.
§69. Therefore when the council came ...... , and not the least wise.'
§70 But the sons of Fëanor departed ....... with their kinsfolk westward, save at need.
§71 It is said, indeed, that {Maidros}[Maedros] ....... , though it slept now for a time.
§72. SA-EX-17 {In this year}[During this time] Fingolfin, King of the Noldor, called .... Shadow brooded in the North. (At this feast it is recorded that the tongue of the Grey-elves was most spoken even by the Noldor, for whereas the Noldor readily learned the speech of the land, the Sindar were slow to master the tongue of Aman.)>
SA-EX-18 {But the}The hearts of the Noldor were high and full of hope, and it seemed to many of them that the words of Fëanor had been justified, bidding them seek freedom and fair kingdoms in Middle-earth.

SA-EX-01: I have chosen this subheading from the Grey Annals as a more fitting name for the chapter, after adding in much material from the Grey Annals, as the bulk of this chapter now deals with events before the Siege of Angband. In the published Sil, CT named it "Of the Return of the Noldor," but I opted to stick with the Tolkien heading from the Grey Annals.
SA-LQ-01: The whole original first paragraph of QS was replaced by a few paragraphs in LQ.
SA-EX-02: Some material from the Grey Annals not in QS or LQ
SA-EX-03: Same as 02
SA-EX-04: The account in the Grey Annals is far more fleshed out, so I have replaced the QS account. There is a minor difference between the two, in that in the (older) QS version the battle takes place in Bladorion, whereas in the (newer) GA version it is a vast battle taking place in Mithrim, Serech, and Bladorion over the course of 10 days. The LQ account never updated the story in QS, but it can be assumed that the GA version was the final one, as it was written at a similar time to LQ, and could be viewed as a summary, with only minute differences.
SA-EX-05: We are told in Q&E that the term Moriquendi was considered offensive and never used by the people in Beleriand, so I replaced the terms with the more acceptable Amanyar and Umanyar.
SA-EX-06: This is the transition from the GA insertion to the QS main text. I have moved the descriptors for Maedros up to the first occurrence of his name in the new paragraph to smooth out the transition.
SA-EX-07: I eliminated "six" because one of the twins is dead at this point.
SA-LQ-02: This is the LQ update to the QS text.
SA-LQ-03: This is the LQ update to the QS text.
SA-LQ-04: This was removed in LQ
SA-EX-08: This account in GA was fuller, so I added it in, along with a paragraph break from GA.
SA-EX-09: The peril of war was not in QS.
SA-LQ-05: Update from QS to LQ.
SA-EX-10: This is not in QS.
SA-EX-11: Again, not in QS.
SA-LQ-06: Update from QS to LQ.
SA-LQ-07: This heading was added into he LQ text.
SA-LQ-08: Update from QS to LQ.
SA-LQ-09: This was added in LQ.
SA-EX-12: This is not in QS.
SA-LQ-10: Update from QS to LQ.
SA-LQ-11: Update from QS to LQ.
SA-EX-13: I removed this, firstly because in the Shibboleth insertion we used it is said that the Noldor did not have time to unload most of the things from the ships, so they cannot have Fingolfin's stuff to give him, and secondly because in the Grey Annals account Maedros renounces the kingship later at a council. I have left the sentence in about the discontent of the Sons of Feanor, but as this was in reference to the kingship this may be removed.
SA-EX-14: This is said later on in a Grey Annals insertion.
SA-EX-15: This is an addition I am making in the interest of keeping the Of the Siege of Angband heading in the text, as well as to separate a very large section of Grey Annals text concerning the Siege into its own section. There is no heading here in QS, but I think it merits one in this version.
SA-EX-16: This section is replaced by a much much fuller version in the Grey Annals.
SA-EX-17: This is a simple wording change due to the fact that this is not Annal format.
SA-EX-18: Here we come back to our QS base text, but as the antecedent sentences were removed, the "But" has no reference, so I have removed it for smoother transition.

With that, all the drafts for the First Age are complete!!!
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