Merendis's list of misused homophones - Page 2 - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Ithaeliel · 08-21-2002, 06:53 PM

He wood chuck, he wood, as much as he cod if a would chuck cod chuck would.

Estelyn Telcontar · 10-01-2002, 03:45 PM

Here's a nice one:

reading allowed (instead of aloud)

Aren't we glad that it is permitted?! [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

The Squatter of Amon Rûdh · 10-26-2002, 11:07 AM

The following is a real find, since it manages to combine two instances of homophone abuse with the dreaded (sp?):

Quote:

at least strong enough to be able to hue (sp? not the colour) with an single Axe swipe (if your strong and skilled enough).

Childlike Empress · 10-28-2002, 09:41 AM

This, too; three (mis-spelled) homophones in only half a sentence.

Quote:

As for whither or not Tolkien would have compleated writting about the End

[ October 28, 2002: Message edited by: Childlike Empress ]

Susan Delgado · 11-10-2002, 05:23 AM

Quote:

They where one's great King's of men

Misused homophones combined with a misquote.

[ November 10, 2002: Message edited by: Susan Delgado ]

Estelyn Telcontar · 12-16-2002, 01:51 PM

Here's a lovely example:

Quote:

The film is great but it pails beside the book.

Must be the book in which...

Quote:

Saruman becomes impailed

Or am I just inclined to

Quote:

knitpick

???

Estelyn Telcontar · 12-30-2002, 02:56 PM

We now know that the black robes were not dirty - their owners, the "wringwraiths", must have washed them!

dragoneyes · 01-03-2003, 08:41 AM

Quote:

I hope this sight is worth my time

I hope it is too.

doug*platypus · 01-10-2003, 03:03 AM

More of a homage than a gripe...

Quote:

burrahobbit! your back.

In the context of the thread it was hard to work out what this meant! I thought it was like "LOOK OUT!!! Behind you!" (I honestly did - oops!), and it wasn't til later I guessed that maybe Burrahobbit had taken a short leave of absence. Maybe to go and have something to do with a Troll's pocket.

Belin · 01-11-2003, 03:53 AM

On a very old thread, I found this:

Quote:

He reached into his cloak and pulled out a small vile

A small vile what, I wonder? Chipmunk?

[img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

--Belin Ibaimendi

[ January 11, 2003: Message edited by: Belin ]

Rosseiliantiel · 01-12-2003, 11:55 AM

How about the 'Naz-Ghouls'?

Quote:

"Gandalf, they're in the Shire, their in the Shire!" Pippin ran out of
the direction of the Shire.

Owwwww.

[ January 12, 2003: Message edited by: Rosseiliantiel ]

doug*platypus · 01-20-2003, 02:19 AM

I swore on my pet elephant's grave that this doozie would not go unnoticed. From an RPG discussion thread:

Quote:

Hey again. Glad to be excepted!

Okay, fine, be that way - we didn't want you anyway! Rest in peace, Tibor...

Ithaeliel · 01-21-2003, 09:02 PM

Man, this topic rocked... glad to see it back.

Here's a good won (misuse intended):

Do you think Lord of the Rings should have one a Golden Globe?

Um, but aren't ONE and A synonymous...? [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Susan Delgado · 01-23-2003, 03:20 AM

Couldn't let this pass:

Quote:

Only some of the Nandor went to Eriador, lead by Denethor, most then excavated to Beleriand

I suppose they could have done excavations, but I really thought that was more the Dwarves' mileu.

[ January 23, 2003: Message edited by: Susan Delgado ]

The Squatter of Amon Rûdh · 01-24-2003, 04:44 AM

Quote:

If Hobbits eat so much and where so portly why wheren't there ever any hart attacts there?

Possibly because harts are herbivores and hobbits are too portly to chase them.

Rimbaud · 01-25-2003, 08:00 AM

Excerpt from recent chat-log, #BD:

___________

* Din****er fined pickle on floor...eats it anyway
Ga*******n> DF!
Din*****er> *fines

___________

An intriguing economic model.

[ January 25, 2003: Message edited by: Rimbaud ]

Estelyn Telcontar · 01-27-2003, 11:56 PM

...agreeing with a favorite character/creature:

Quote:

I conquer with the Gollum vote

I guess Gollum came, saw and concurred! [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

Susan Delgado · 01-28-2003, 01:42 AM

From an RPG in which the character is a Blacksmith:

Quote:

The blade hardly needed sharpening, but Jadae had had no other costumers that day, so it didn't matter.

Must have been dramatacists' off-season, that the poor costumers have to work in a smithy.

**The Saucepan Man** · 01-28-2003, 09:45 PM

Apologies to the author of the very fine post from which this came, but I couldn't resist it:

Quote:

due to Tolkien’s dislike of allergy

He was a martyr to hayfever ... [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Diamond18 · 01-30-2003, 10:13 PM

Quote:

Faramir was a mayor dissapointment

True, true, I guess he'd never get elected Mayor of Hobbiton with the way he behaved in the movie...

Estelyn Telcontar · 02-06-2003, 07:24 AM

I'm puzzled over

Quote:

dyehard fans

Just what is it that changes colour with such difficulty??

The Squatter of Amon Rûdh · 02-06-2003, 07:55 AM

A colour-blind chamaeleon?

Diamond18 · 02-09-2003, 08:10 PM

Oooh, a fresh typo (with the utmost respect to the author, who is probably editing it out as I speak):

Quote:

(insert wretching sound here).

I wonder how exactly one "wretchs" and what it sounds like...

Estelyn Telcontar · 02-11-2003, 03:51 PM

The literacy of the LotR experts:

Quote:

Tolkien scholars going on about how they are always write

Mental undressing??

Quote:

Bare in mind

The Squatter of Amon Rûdh · 02-16-2003, 04:08 PM

I think that this is the most unfortunate misuse of a homophone to date:

Quote:

LOTR was also a grate book

Bêthberry · 02-17-2003, 01:06 PM

The Downs takes a washing on this one:

Quote:

In the first book, I didn't get exactly what the Barrow Whites were, can someone explain what they are?

Tide? Blue Cheer? Javex?

Bethberry

XPhial · 02-17-2003, 09:37 PM

<Annundalia> Me and my friend were balling when we found out.

I was bawling too.

The Squatter of Amon Rûdh · 02-18-2003, 06:47 AM

Quote:

I didn't get exactly what the Barrow Whites were

I would suggest that they are what Ron washes when he's finished his darks.

Nuranar · 02-21-2003, 11:01 PM

Quote:

I hope that didn't boar anyone to death.

What a gruesome way to die.

Bêthberry · 02-24-2003, 02:55 PM

From a discussion on BarrowDowns' chat site:

Quote:

dont worry, my problem is grammer, though, my teacher thinks im wonderful at wrighting storys.

Bb

VanimaEdhel · 02-27-2003, 05:07 PM

Something I found on the Chat:

Quote:

It is impossible to pay to much attention to a movie, Alka

The person apparently doesn't know about "to", "too", and "two". I'll assume it was a typographical error (however, he didn't correct himself at all). [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

Estelyn Telcontar · 03-02-2003, 07:36 AM

Quote:

...riot's might brake out.

Where are the brakes located on riots? That would be a very good thing to know!

**The Saucepan Man** · 03-05-2003, 07:32 PM

Quote:

Tolkien lived through the rain of Queen Elizabeth

Can't say that surprises me. After all, we do have rather a lot of precipitation in Britain. [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img]

[ March 05, 2003: Message edited by: The Saucepan Man ]

Estelyn Telcontar · 03-07-2003, 02:55 PM

Quote:

In the Silm it says Melkor bread the dragons.

Do you fry or bake breaded dragons?? And "is it tasty? Is it crunchable?"

[ March 07, 2003: Message edited by: Estelyn Telcontar ]

Estelyn Telcontar · 03-10-2003, 03:20 AM

Quote:

Which King

Is the Which a witch??

Quote:

The Wight Rider

Since when does B-W have a horse??

[ March 10, 2003: Message edited by: Estelyn Telcontar ]

Hilde Bracegirdle · 03-10-2003, 12:05 PM

Quote:

As a bonus I have learned to use the dicitioonairy and can now type up to 20 wpm...

I don't mean to be mean adding this in here, but it made me smile! Would you say that he/she needs a dictionary or to type slower?

Actually, I need the dictionary as it's not a homophone!

[ March 10, 2003: Message edited by: Hilde Bracegirdle ]

Ithaeliel · 03-12-2003, 08:34 PM

Quote:

The Eldar weeded for the most part in their youth and soon after their fiftieth year

Ah, the joys of gardening when you're young and hale... I wonder what became of their flowers after the elves hit fifty?

Galadrie1 · 03-17-2003, 03:17 PM

A thousand apologies to the person who posted this, but I just couldn't resist.

Quote:

the Barrow-Weight

Just how much does a Barrow weigh? Would you include everything inside it in the weight?

**The Saucepan Man** · 03-21-2003, 08:30 PM

Quote:

Shire- The rolling hills of Whales

Presumably that'll be Humpback Whales. [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img]

Sophia the Thunder Mistress · 03-21-2003, 09:08 PM

Many many apologies to the person who wrote this, but I thought of this thread the minute I saw it and laughed for ages...

Quote:

The rolling planes

Like airliners? or fighter jets maybe?

Another winner is when you run a couple of words together...

Quote:

hob*****aracter

[ March 21, 2003: Message edited by: Sophia the Thunder Mistress ]

08-21-2002, 06:53 PM	#41
Ithaeliel Cornus Caliga Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Five-hundred-twenty-five thousand, six hundred minutes from here Posts: 724	He wood chuck, he wood, as much as he cod if a would chuck cod chuck would. __________________ That best portion of a good man's life, His little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and of love. .................William Wordsworth

10-01-2002, 03:45 PM	#42
Estelyn Telcontar Princess of Skwerlz Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: where the Sea is eastwards (WtR: 6060 miles) Posts: 7,645	Here's a nice one: reading allowed (instead of aloud) Aren't we glad that it is permitted?! [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img] __________________ 'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'

12-30-2002, 02:56 PM	#47
Estelyn Telcontar Princess of Skwerlz Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: where the Sea is eastwards (WtR: 6060 miles) Posts: 7,645	We now know that the black robes were not dirty - their owners, the "wringwraiths", must have washed them! __________________ 'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'

01-21-2003, 09:02 PM	#53
Ithaeliel Cornus Caliga Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Five-hundred-twenty-five thousand, six hundred minutes from here Posts: 724	Man, this topic rocked... glad to see it back. Here's a good won (misuse intended): Do you think Lord of the Rings should have one a Golden Globe? Um, but aren't ONE and A synonymous...? [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] __________________ That best portion of a good man's life, His little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and of love. .................William Wordsworth

01-25-2003, 08:00 AM	#56
Rimbaud The Perilous Poet Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Heart of the matter Posts: 1,096	Excerpt from recent chat-log, #BD: ___________ * Din**er fined pickle on floor...eats it anyway Ga***n> DF! Din**er> fines ___________ An intriguing economic model. [ January 25, 2003: Message edited by: Rimbaud ] __________________ And all the rest is literature

02-06-2003, 07:55 AM	#62
The Squatter of Amon Rûdh Spectre of Decay Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Bar-en-Danwedh Posts: 2,206	A colour-blind chamaeleon? __________________ Man kenuva métim' andúne?

02-17-2003, 09:37 PM	#67
XPhial Pile O'Bones Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Here, there, and everywhere. Posts: 24	<Annundalia> Me and my friend were balling when we found out. I was bawling too. __________________ Must we take a life for hateful eyes to glisten once again? For we find ourselves in the same old mess singin' drunken lullabies.