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Old 04-27-2006, 11:39 PM   #10521
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Elrond: What do those Orc banners say? "We'll fill you"? What?

Soldier: I think you forgot your glasses, sir.

OR

Elrond was always nervous on these roller coasters.

Or yet!

Elrond: I think I left the iron on.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 04-28-2006, 01:43 AM   #10522
Lalwendë
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Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Elrond perfects his middle distance vacant stare as he rides to work on the Ringular tube line.
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Old 04-28-2006, 08:18 AM   #10523
mormegil
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mormegil is a guest at the Prancing Pony.mormegil is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
A good pre-battle kick line was the tradition amongst elves, though the records tell us precious little, this visual record is proof positive that the ritual was indeed performed.
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Old 04-28-2006, 11:44 AM   #10524
Eomer of the Rohirrim
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Eomer of the Rohirrim is a guest at the Prancing Pony.Eomer of the Rohirrim is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
Shield

The Rivendell Elves film their own Bohemian Rhapsody video.

or

Battle or no battle, Elrond does not miss the opportunity to tan.
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Los Ingobernables de Harlond
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Old 04-28-2006, 11:56 AM   #10525
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Sauron was so experienced at pick-pocketing. He had not only swiped Elrond's helm but also his trousers. It will be another five seconds before he realises.

OR

The POMEAGGU (People Of Middle Earth Against Gandalf the Grey Uncloaked) Come against their foe!
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 04-28-2006, 12:14 PM   #10526
mormegil
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mormegil is a guest at the Prancing Pony.mormegil is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
Elrond remembers at this most inoportune time that he forgot to take his Imodium A-D this morning.
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Old 04-28-2006, 01:31 PM   #10527
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Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Elrond had taken a few days off to go skiing in the white mountains before heading to battle.
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Old 04-28-2006, 01:34 PM   #10528
The Only Real Estel
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The Only Real Estel has just left Hobbiton.
Pipe

Elrond: "I hate this heat! Not only is it too hot and stuffy in here, my sweat is making my manly-looking fake beard rub off!"
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Old 04-28-2006, 02:10 PM   #10529
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davem is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.davem is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
ELVISH WHISPERS

Elrond: 'What do you mean 'Send three & fourpence, we're going to a dance?????'

OR

Elrond: "Do you hear that, Mr. Aegnor? That is the sound of inevitability."

Aegnor: "No Sir, it was me - just nerves. Sorry Sir'

Elrond: 'I thought it was a wind out of the West!

Last edited by davem; 04-28-2006 at 02:27 PM.
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Old 04-29-2006, 07:54 AM   #10530
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Parmastahir has just left Hobbiton.
Oh, THAT'S what they meant?!

"When they said 'Put a helmet on that soldier', I thought they meant something else!"
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Old 04-29-2006, 10:49 AM   #10531
narfforc
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I need to change my underwear

Elrond: Don't shoot until you see the whites of their eyes

Soldier 1: What happens if their eyes are yellow or red

Elrond: Well shoot when you hear knees knocking together

Soldier 2: What happens if they're not scared of us

Elrond: Don't worry about that, it will be my knees knocking anyway.
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[B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER.
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Old 04-29-2006, 02:05 PM   #10532
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Gandalf_the _white has just left Hobbiton.
Elrond had been taking lessons from Aragorn:How not to bath.
OR
Aragorns disguise was perfect except that he forgot to have a wash before putting it on
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Old 04-29-2006, 02:07 PM   #10533
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Elrond: I bet Elros never had this trouble.

OR

Elrond regretted playing poker with Galadriel. It was worse than playing strip poker with Gandalf... well, not THAT bad...
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 04-29-2006, 02:12 PM   #10534
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Gandalf_the _white has just left Hobbiton.
I can't believe it!! Boromirs catapult idea worked!!
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Old 04-29-2006, 11:20 PM   #10535
Parmawen
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Parmawen has just left Hobbiton.
"So after this, whoever waxed my eyebrows is going down...I told them 'a little off the top'...not the WHOLE BLOODY BROW...*sniffle*" -Elrond.
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I sang of leaves, of leaves of gold, and leaves of gold there grew.
Of wind I sang, I wind there came, and in the branches blew...
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Old 04-30-2006, 01:34 AM   #10536
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up I say!

Elrond: Good grief! A new picture!



Witch King: I'm going to ask you one more time, nicely... Is this the right road for Minas Tirith?

OR

Witch King: Will you stop laughing? It’s not that funny!

Or even:

Fell Beast: BUUUURRRPPP!
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 04-30-2006, 03:25 AM   #10537
Kath
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Kath is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Kath is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Kath is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
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Pippin wondered just when Gandalf would get the password right this time.

OR

Gandalf's first attempts at dentistry weren't met with much enthusiasm.
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Old 04-30-2006, 04:25 AM   #10538
narfforc
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narfforc has been trapped in the Barrow!
The Witch-King of Hang-on-a-minute

Witch-king: Old fool this is my time

Gandalf: Yes,yes just wait until I find my contact lense.
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Old 04-30-2006, 05:53 AM   #10539
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up Drunk flying...

Witch King: He just stepped out in front of me! I didn't see him coming!

Gandalf: I'll sue you into the nothingness that awaits you and your dark master!

OR

Gandalf: And I got this scar from fighting a pyromaniac steward, and this one from the time I was uncloaking at Bilbo’s party and this one…

Witch King: Kill me now!
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 04-30-2006, 05:57 AM   #10540
Lalwendë
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Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Fell Beast: "Kurrrrrrrhhhhhh kurrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhh yiiiiiiiiiiiicccccccc......."

Witch King: "Oh, hell, he's trying to bring up another fur ball."
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Gordon's alive!
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Old 04-30-2006, 06:14 AM   #10541
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up A Film Advertisment!

This summer:
4 unlikely heroes must join forces in order to find the straight road:
A lazy Wizard
An outcast Half ling
A Dead guy
And a Horse with an attitude.

In the new comedy adventure: Looking' for a road.

Coming to Cinemas June 9th 1023 IV Age.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 04-30-2006, 07:31 AM   #10542
Kuruharan
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Kuruharan is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Kuruharan is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Kuruharan is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Boots Continuing the intoxication theme

Gandalf: No *hic* really offisher...I onnnnly hash a wittle bit ta be...sochible *hic*
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...finding a path that cannot be found, walking a road that cannot be seen, climbing a ladder that was never placed, or reading a paragraph that has no...
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Old 04-30-2006, 07:40 AM   #10543
Mithalwen
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Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Memories of old school riding lessons:

Witch King Instructor : "For goodness sake you have to get straight back on before you lose your nerve. Stop making a fuss about a silly little tumble "
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Old 04-30-2006, 12:56 PM   #10544
Meela
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Meela has just left Hobbiton.
White Tree

Gandalf is overpowered by a greater evil than the Witch-King - a Fell Beast's breath.
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'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age?
2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard.
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Old 04-30-2006, 02:27 PM   #10545
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Formendacil is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Formendacil is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Formendacil is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Formendacil is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
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Pippin and the Witchking look at each other in terror: Gandalf's empty cloak, lying on the road, can mean only one thing: Gandalf the White is somewhere, Uncloaked.
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Old 04-30-2006, 03:27 PM   #10546
Farael
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Farael has just left Hobbiton.
I can't believe no-one got this

Fell beast: YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!!
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Old 04-30-2006, 05:03 PM   #10547
The Only Real Estel
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Pipe At the Rodeo

The crowd (the Fell Beast mainly) roars with laughter at the latest cowboys' attempt to ride the famed bucking bronco Shadowfax.
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Old 04-30-2006, 09:00 PM   #10548
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Gurthang has just left Hobbiton.
The fell beast's jaw drops to the floor upon seeing Gandalf uncloak.

OR

Pippin and Shadowfax do their best statue imitations hoping that the Witch-King won't notice them.

OR

Fell Beast: *Pant pant pant*
Witch-King: "Gandalf, have you by chance seen a three-foot, red rubber ball? It's difficult to play fetch when we don't have our ball."
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Old 04-30-2006, 09:51 PM   #10549
mormegil
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mormegil is a guest at the Prancing Pony.mormegil is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
It was a dark moment for all those of Minas Tirith, the Witch-King had arrived. As none but the most stout hearted could even stand his presence Gandalf had to face him alone. Gandalf strode forward with a regal magnificence not seen in Middle-earth since the first age. His flowy white hair glistened and his aura seemingly emmited a light as if his very sould possesed the light of the Silmaril.

As he marched towards his destiny Gandalf thought, "this will take all my skill and strength, even then is it enough to best this foe?"

Each step seemed like minutes, however at length he arrived to confront his foe. Gandlaf drew himself to his full height and raised his staff, to all who saw it seemed that the white grew while the dark diminished. Then Gandalf spoke, his voice was as solid as rock and as clear as a horn when he said, "Go back fiend, it is not your time, go back to the abyss that was prepared for you and your mas...What's this? A penny! Well I'll be, say here W-K be a good lad and wait a moment while I pick it up."
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Old 04-30-2006, 10:12 PM   #10550
THE Ka
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Shadowfax had enough of the 'uncloaking' jokes...

Shadowfax: This is just ridiculous... *exits stage left*


~ Aesthete
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Vinur, vinur skilur tú meg? Veitst tú ongan loyniveg?
Hevur tú reikađ líka sum eg,
í endaleysu tokuni?
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Old 05-01-2006, 12:55 AM   #10551
Hookbill the Goomba
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Fell Beast: *spits*

Gandalf: Aaaagh! I'm melting! No-ooooo!!

OR

Pippin: Silly Gandalf can't take his ale.

Gandalf: Wee! I'm not going to hurt you Mr Dragon. Give us a kiss! *Hick-up*

W - K: I'm... going to... go... now.
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once.
THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 05-01-2006, 01:59 AM   #10552
The Sixth Wizard
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White Tree

Witch King: Oh my GOD Gandalf, must you always leave yourself as a prime target for the "uncloaking" jokes?

OR

Pippin: Oh no Gandalf's gone and his cape is left behind!
Why does he have to impersonate Archimedes at a time like this?

(get it, Archimedes running out of the bath saying Eureka? YOU DON'T?! <sigh>)

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Old 05-01-2006, 11:14 AM   #10553
Bęthberry
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Bęthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.Bęthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.Bęthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.Bęthberry is wading through snowdrifts on Redhorn.
Pipe

Gandalf contemplates a quick burst of Flame Imperishable which will relegate the fell beast to dinosaur mythology.
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Old 05-01-2006, 11:30 AM   #10554
Lalwendë
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Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Lalwendë is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
Pippin: "Gandalf! This is the last time I take you in the Tate Modern! You always freak out at the modern art. This is just the Witch King's performance art reinterpretation of Francis Bacon's Three Studies for Figures at the Base of a Crucifixion. I believe it is in the running for the Turner Prize."
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Gordon's alive!
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Old 05-01-2006, 12:16 PM   #10555
Mithalwen
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Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Ent Draught strikes again...

Pippin is more interested by the fact that he is now significantly taller than Shadowfax than by the fell beast.
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Old 05-01-2006, 12:54 PM   #10556
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Rune Son of Bjarne is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Rune Son of Bjarne is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Rune Son of Bjarne is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
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Tolkien Little known fact:

Where other "beasts" cough up hair-balls, The Witch-Kings coughs up Wizards.

This also explains the origin of the Istari.

or

The Witch-King made a little on the side by running a laundry service.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lalaith View Post
Rune is my brother from another mother.

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Old 05-01-2006, 03:00 PM   #10557
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Maeggaladiel has just left Hobbiton.
Gandalf: No, you can NOT borrow my sidewalk chalk! Can't you see I'm using it right now?


OR


Wizard-tipping became the game of choice for young fell beasts.


OR

Jealous of Gandalf's height advantage, Pippin secretly pays the fell beast to bite off Gandalf's legs.
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Old 05-01-2006, 04:10 PM   #10558
The Elf-warrior
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Shadowfax got a better offer.
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Fenris Wolf: WW LXXX.
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Old 05-01-2006, 08:07 PM   #10559
Nilpaurion Felagund
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Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines]
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Nilpaurion Felagund is a guest at the Prancing Pony.Nilpaurion Felagund is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
Boots X to the Z. Hehe.

Witch-King: Hey, dude, I need you to pimp my ride!
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フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo)
The plot, cut, defeated.
I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...
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Old 05-01-2006, 11:46 PM   #10560
Hookbill the Goomba
Alive without breath
 
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 6,153
Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
W - K: Old Fool! Old Fool! Do you not know death when you see it? This is my hour!

Pippin: *Eats popcorn*

OR

Everyone waits in line at the Minas Tirith McDonalds Ride through.

Shadow fax: Yeah, I'll have a Big Mc, a Horn Burger and a diet Denethor shake.
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THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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