The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum


Visit The *EVEN NEWER* Barrow-Downs Photo Page

Go Back   The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum > The New Silmarillion > Translations from the Elvish - Public Forum
User Name
Password
Register FAQ Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read


 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
Old 06-12-2018, 05:13 PM   #1
Findegil
King's Writer
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 1,437
Findegil is a guest of Tom Bombadil.
The Last Alliance

This is the first draft of the chapter The Last Alliance in the part The Black Years.

The Basic Text in this chapter is of course from Of the Rings of Power out of the Sil77, nonetheless and I will give source information for each part that is used.

The markings are:
BY-HL-zz for Black Years, Head-Lines, marking all headlines for the chapters in this part.

LA-SL-zz for The Last Alliance, Story-Line, to document all changes that construct the main text.

Some conventions of my writing:
Normal Text is from the text that is mentioned in the source information of each insert.
Bold Text = source information, comments and remarks
{example} = text that should be deleted
[example] = normalised text, normally only used for general changes
<source example> = additions with source information
example = text inserted for grammatical or metrical reason
/example/ = outline expansion
Normally if an inserted text includes the beginning of a new § these is indicated by a missing “>” at the end of the § and a missing “<” at the beginning of the next.
Quote:
BY-HL-20<editorial addition The Last Alliance
When Sauorn came back to Middel-earth> LA-SL-01<Of the Rings of Power {There} he found that the power of Gil-galad had grown great in the years of his absence, ... and meditated war.
In that time those of the Númenóreans ... and they descended upon Middle-earth like birds of the storm.
Elendil was cast up by the waves in the land of Lindon, ... but the towers of Emyn Beraid still look towards the sea.
Isildur and Anárion were borne away southwards, ... Long before in the days of their power the mariners of Númenor had established a haven and strong places about the mouths of Anduin LA-SL-02<editorial addition named Pelargir >, in despite of Sauron in the Black Land that lay nigh upon the east. In the later days to this haven came only the Faithful of Númenor, and many therefore of the folk of the coastlands in that region were in whole or in part akin to the Elf-friends and the people of Elendil, and they welcomed his sons. LA-SL-03<Cirion and Eorl, Note 39 and The History of Galdriel and Celeborn , Note 16 {The Lord of Dol Amroth had this title. It}To Ernil the title ‘Prince’ was given {to his ancestors }by Elendil, with whom {they}he had kinship. {They were}He was the head of a family of the Faithful who had sailed from Númenor before the Downfall and had settled in the land of Belfalas, between the mouths of Ringló and Gilrain{, with a stronghold upon the high promontory of Dol Amroth (named after the last King of Lórien)}. >The chief city of this southern realm was Osgiliath, ... These were the chief dwellings of the Númenóreans in Gondor, but other works marvellous and strong they built in the land in the days of their power, at the Argonath, and at Aglarond, and at LA-SL-04{Erech}<LotR, Book I, Chapter 11 the Hill of Erech{.
Long had the terror of the Dead lain upon that hill and upon the empty fields about it. For} upon the top stood a black stone, round as a great globe, the height of a man, though its half was buried in the ground. Unearthly it looked, as though it had fallen from the sky, as some believed; but those who remembered still the lore of Westernesse told that it had been brought out of the ruin of Númenor and there set by Isildur at his landing.> LA-SL-05<HoMe 5; The last Debate It was set upto mark the the meeting place of Isildur and Anárion with the last king of the dark men of the Mountains, who swore allegiance to the sons of Elendil, vowing to aid them and their kin for ever, ‘even though Death should take us.’>{; and}And in the circle of Angrenost, which Men called Isengard, they made the Pinnacle of Orthanc of unbreakable stone.
Many treasures and great heirlooms of virtue ... but the Stones were divided.
Three Elendil took, ... and little escaped their vigilance in the days of their might.
It is said that the towers of Emyn Beraid ... but all those that were brought to Middle-earth long ago were lost.

Thus the Exiles of Númenor established their realms in Arnor and in Gondor; ... and the malice of the Eye of Sauron few even of the great among Elves and Men could endure.
Now Sauron prepared war against the Eldar and the Men of Westernesse, ... a great and cruel people that dwelt in the wide lands south of Mordor beyond the mouths of Anduin.
LA-SL-06<HoMe 5; The last Debate Isildur came to the Stone of Erech, when he gathered strength to resist the power of Mordor, and he summoned the Men of the Mountains to come to his aid, and they would not.
{'}Then Isildur said to their king of that day: "Thou shalt be the last. Yet if the West prove mightier than thy black Master, this curse I set on thee and thy folk: to rest never till your oath is fulfilled. For this war shall last down many ages, and you shall be summoned once again ere the end." And they fled before the wrath of Isildur, and did not dare to go forth to war on Sauron's part. And they hid themselves in secret places in the mountains and seldom came forth again, but slowly died and dwindled in the barren hills.> LA-SL-07<HoMe 5; The last Debate But afterwards{, in the days of Gondor's later power, men set a ring-wall about the Stone of Erech, and built beside it on the hilltop a tall dark tower, and there was guarded the seventh Palantir, which now is lost.(27) The tower is ruinous and the ring-wall is broken, and} all about the land {is}was empty, for none {will}would dwell near the Hill of Erech, because it {is}was said that at times the Shadow-men will gather there, thronging about the {ruined wall}stone, and whispering. And though their tongue is now long forgotten, it is said that they {cry}cried "We are come!" and they {wish}wished to fulfill the broken oath and be at rest. But the terror of the Dead {lies}lied on that hill and all the land about.
> When therefore Sauron saw his time ... and Anárion knew that unless help should come his kingdom would not long stand.
Now Elendil and Gil-galad took counsel together, for they perceived that Sauron would grow too strong and would overcome all his enemies one by one, if they did not unite against him. Therefore they made that League which is called the Last Alliance. LA-SL-08<The History of Galadriel and Celeborn At that time also Gil-galad gave{ Vilya, the Blue Ring, to Elrond, and appointed him to be his vice-regent in Eriador; but} the Red Ring{ he kept, until he gave it} to Círdan when he set out from Lindon{ in the days of the Last Alliance}.> LA-SL-09<LotR, Book I, Chapter 11 It is told that Elendil stood {there}upon the Tower of Amon Sûl watching for the coming of Gil-galad out of the West, in the days of the Last Alliance{.}>, and they marched east into Middle-earth gathering a great host of Elves and Men; and they halted for a while at Imladris. LA-SL-10<LotR, Book II, Chapter 2 {I}Elrond was the herald of Gil-galad and marched with his host. > It is said that the host that was there assembled was fairer and more splendid in arms than any that has since been seen in Middle-earth, and none greater has been mustered since the host of the Valar went against Thangorodrim.
From Imladris they crossed the Misty Mountains by many passes and marched down the River Anduin, and LA-SL-11<LotR, Book III, Chapter 4 Sauron {of old }destroyed the gardens>< of the Entwives{ are wasted}: Men call them the Brown Lands now.> {so}So Gil-galad and Elendil came at last upon the host of Sauron on Dagorlad, the Battle Plain, which lies before the gate of the Black Land. All living things were divided in that day, and some of every kind, even of beasts and birds, were found in either host, save the Elves only. They alone were undivided and followed Gil-galad. Of the Dwarves few fought upon either side; but the kindred of Durin of Moria fought against Sauron. LA-SL-12<The History of Galadriel and Celeborn; Appendix B
Despite the desire of the Silvan Elves to meddle as little as might be in the affairs of the Noldor and Sindar, or of any other peoples, Dwarves, Men, or Orcs, Oropher had the wisdom to foresee that peace would not return unless Sauron was overcome. He therefore assembled a great army of his now numerous people, and joining with the lesser army of Malgalad of Lórien he led the host of the Silvan Elves to battle. The Silvan Elves were hardy and valiant, but ill-equipped with armour or weapons in comparison with the Eldar of the West; also they were independent, and not disposed to place themselves under the supreme command of Gil-galad. Their losses were thus more grievous than they need have been, even in that terrible war. Malgalad and more than half his following perished in the great battle of the Dagorlad, being cut off from the main host and driven into the Dead Marshes. Oropher was slain in the first assault upon Mordor, rushing forward at the head of his most doughty warriors before Gil-galad had given the signal for the advance.>
The host of Gil-galad and Elendil had the victory, for the might of the Elves was still great in those days, and the Númenóreans were strong and tall, and terrible in their wrath. Against Aeglos the spear of Gil-galad none could stand; and the sword of Elendil filled Orcs and Men with fear, for it shone with the light of the sun and of the moon, and it was named Narsil.
Then LA-SL-13<The Disaster of the Gladden Fields, Note 11 Isildur{ had} sent {them}Aratan and Ciryon to man his fortress of Minas Ithil, lest Sauron should escape Gil galad and Elendil and seek to force away through Cirith Dúath (later called Cirith Ungol) and take vengeance on the Dúnedain before he was overcome. >Gil-galad and Elendil passed into Mordor and encompassed the stronghold of Sauron; and they laid siege to it for seven years, and suffered grievous loss by fire and by the darts and bolts of the Enemy, and Sauron sent many sorties against them. There in the valley of Gorgoroth /beside many others /Anárion son of Elendil was slain LA-SL-14<LotR, Appendix A; Note 25(for the helm of Anárion was crushed by the stone-cast from Barad-dûr that slew him)>{, and many others}. But at the last the siege was so strait that Sauron himself came forth; and he wrestled with Gil-galad and Elendil LA-SL-15<LotR, Book II, Chapter 2 <on the slopes of Orodruin.>{He}Isildur alone stood by his father in that last mortal contest; and by Gil-galad only Círdan stood, and {I}Elrond.><Gil-galad died> by< the heat of Sauron's hand, which was black and yet burned like fire, and so Gil-galad was destroyed;>{, and they both were slain}, and the sword of Elendil broke under him as he fell. But Sauron also was thrown down, and with the hilt-shard of Narsil Isildur cut the Ruling Ring from the hand of Sauron and took it for his own. Then Sauron was for that time vanquished, and he forsook his body, and his spirit fled far away and hid in waste places; and he took no visible shape again for many long years.> LA-SL-16<Of the Rings of Power For Isildur would not surrender {it}the Ruling Ring to Elrond and Círdan who stood by. They counselled him to cast it into the fire of Orodruin nigh at hand, in which it had been forged, so that it should perish, and the power of Sauron be for ever diminished, and he should remain only as a shadow of malice in the wilderness. But Isildur refused this counsel, saying: ‘This I will have as were-gild for my father's death, and my brothers. Was it not I that dealt the Enemy his death-blow?' And the Ring that he held seemed to him exceedingly fair to look on; and he would not suffer it to be destroyed.> LA-SL-17<LotR, Book II, Chapter 2 {' "This I will have as weregild for my father, and my brother," he said; and therefore}Therefore whether {we}Elrond or Círdan would or no, he took it to treasure it.>
Somme comments on my editing:

BY-HL-20: I did not find a good head line of Tolkien for this. I do not like it much to invent one, but I did not see any better choice.

LA-SL-01: We have to add here a kind of indication to what this refers, since the ‘There’ has lost its reference.

LA-SL-02: A lot of text was have added between the last mention of Pelargir, therefore I think we should give the name here again.

LA-SL-03: This seems to be the right place to give the reason for the title ‘Prince’ that the Lords of Dol-Amroth held. And as I understand the Note about Dor-en-Ernil, Ernil was the name of the Lord that received that title.

LA-SL-04: The oath of the later dead men of Dunharrow belongs chronologically here and there seems no better text than that from LotR.

LA-SL-05: I used this older text because it has a bit more details about the oath.

LA-SL-06: The preliminary version of this are either nearly exactly as this as the final or completely different.

LA-SL-07: At least for this info we have a different wording form this older version.

LA-SL-08: We avoided to give this information as outlook to the future when we told the story of Gil-galad receiving the rings, so it has to come in here.

LA-SL-09: I do not gladly take up sentences from LotR, but here I don’t see any better chance.

LA-SL-10: The same is true here. But in this case it might be acceptable since Elrond the narrator is the sole eye witness we have.

LA-SL-11: A Detail found nowhere else again.

LA-SL-12: We do not have many details about the Battle, so think we have to take whatever we can get.

LA-SL-13: I would like to tell this here and not later in retrospect.

LA-SL-14: A note from the Appendix is safer to take: It must have had a source in the internal recording in Middle-earth, so such details must have been told some where.

LA-SL-15: This is a construction from some passages in the retelling of Elrond during the council in Imlardis.

LA-SL-16: I moved this from later in the text, since I think it belongs rather to end of the Second age instead of the beginning of the Third.

LA-SL-17: At the end of the text I had again no choice but to use Elrond’s account. For me this chapter should end here and we should use the text of the following paragraph from Of the Rings of Power and Thrid Age ‘Thus began the Third Age of the World, after the Eldest Days and the Black Years …’ somewhere at the start of the part ‘The fading Years’.

Respectfully
Findegil

Last edited by Findegil; 06-12-2018 at 05:18 PM.
Findegil is offline   Reply With Quote
 

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 11:55 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.9 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.