The Barrow Downs Newspaper

[Hookbill the Goomba]

The Downer would like to apologise for the lack of inside stories last week. Due to a printing error, the last issue was full of water.

Letters to the Editor
II

Dear sir,

I think your newspaper is vile! I wouldn't buy it if you paid me! Your stories are nonsensical and downright false! Your comics are setting a bad example for children and your outrageous price tag makes me sick!

Yours etcetera, etcetera,

Mr. R.B. Arebe.

Dear Mr. Arebe.

You stink.

Dear Sir,

My son loves The Phantom and Alien, but he would like to know why The Phantom doesn’t just kill Alien!

Yours in haste,

Tony Hash with an Iron Moutache.

Dear Mr Hash,

All will become clear eventually. I hope.

Dear Mr. Editor,

Your report last month about the Barrow Wight being sued was utter nonsense. I, I mean he, did not get sued by anyone. So just stop it!

Yours etcetera,

B. Wightington

Dear sir,

No.